Crossover legends, Season 2
by South Down
Summary: After Braving the Ods, Dipper finally reaches Crossover town is Reunited with Mabel, Together they make new Friends and Enimes, Find out secrets from their Parents and Face the growing threat of Lord Jargafar and the Villain Factions.
1. Chapter 1

**Episode 23.**

**Anal probes.**

**The Journey is finally over, Dipper Mark and their Friends have finally made it to Crossover town, There Dipper is reunited with Family Acquainted with new Friends and finds new enemies, While looming threat of Evil lurks everywhere, Mostly From the wrathful Lord Jargafar.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, While Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman look on blankly at the bus stop.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

Scratch: You cannot keep me-

Suddenly another bunch of Rocks fell to earth and Buried him Causing Cluny and Tak to gasp, Followed by a Large boulder, They gasped again, Than a giant ton of Bricks crushed him, Again they gasped, Than it caught fire and a plane came Crashing down in the pile Exploding into pieces.

Dipper woke up with a Scream.

Dipper: Whoa, You guys I just a crazy dream where we killed Ironclaw and were found by- Oh.

Dib and the others lay in a bunk bed opposite Dipper, Dib on bottom and Vana on the top, A head poked down from Dippers top bunk, It was Stewie, The talking baby who had greeted him.

Stewie: Hey would you keep it down? It's loud enough with Brains snoring without you nerd screaming in your sleep.

Brian woke up from where he lay.

Brian: Wh-What?

Vana: This coming from an abnormally intelligent baby, Who what does "Things with his Stuffed bear.

Stewie: I don't do things to Rupert he does things to me!

Vana: Whatever, Would you guys just shut up, I'm trying to get some sleep.

And Vana went back to bed.

Dipper racked his brain together.

Dipper: I still can't believe I did it… I destroyed the Alpha key.

Dib: You weren't shocked by it earlier.

Dipper: I guess… It was the only way to stop Ironclaw from killing us… Even though he would have done it anyway.

Stewie: Well, You must feel pretty badass about it huh?

Dipper: I… Not really, So… It's almost over.

Brian: Sparxs say we should at the Outskirts by Tomorrow, Badger and the others should be waiting for us in the Encampment.

Dib: Encampment? Why not inside the town.

Stewie: Oh hell no, Not going near that place, I mean Some of us are, but not all, There's been some weird things going on there lately and I for one want no part of it, Besides the people there are nuts.

Brian: Kinda like out old town.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark sat in his chair as he sipped down a cup of wine.

Mark: I'm gonna be honest I didn't think you were out looking for us too, I thought Kitty, Eric and Vana were the only ones.

The black cyborg monkey Mark was talking to simply Nodded.

Antauri: Trust me they weren't, We had gotten word that your team had disappeared in the North pole, (How you got lost their is completely Unknown.) As soon as word of your adventures in France and Ba sing se reached our ears,We were prepared to send out Other scout teams to find and assist you, That was when Ironclaw attacked.

Mark: Huh? You know I had no Idea how we ended up in the North pole either, Must have gone off course when the Egg carrier chased us.

Antauri: Hm, Most likely.

Mark: So, How have things bean?

Antauri: We've. managed to hold together, The sack on Caer dathyl left several of us drained, Confused and… Unsettled, Some of them have been waiting for good news ever since.

Mark: Well, With Scratch Ironclaw dead and the Avatar found, Perhaps this will lift morale up a bit.

Antauri: We can only Hope mark.

A voice was heard over the speaker in Antauri's room.

Chiro: Antuari, We're almost there.

**Later.**

Everyone gathered on the Bridge, All staring in anticipation at the Screen, Among the usual Characters, Were several new ones, Chiro, Sparkx, Nova, Otto and Gibson, Who along with Antauri made up teh Super robot Monkey team or Hperforce that Piloted the Giant robot they were currently in.

Aang: So this is it? We're almost there?

Mac: We're almost there!

Otto: This is like new years all over again!

As the Super Robot came out of the Clouds all could see it clearly now, The Weirdly small town that they had fought so hard to reach... Right there below them. ( And It was a complete let down, Because it was just some Redneck trash heap in the guise of a "Quiet little Mountain town called South park." )

Dib: Seriously, We came all this way for this place?

Katara: What a Dump!

Vana: Thank you, Several of us were born and raised here Bitch!

Sokka: That's Seriously Crossover town?

Sparx: Yep, May not look like much, But it's home, Down there on the Outskirts, That's the Freedom watch encampment.

Gibson: Ah, and there's a few of them come to greet us.

Down below a few figures were waiting for them, The super Robot made it's landing on the pad and allowed All aboard to Disembark, Meeting them were Four Animals, A Badger, A toad, A water Rat and a Mole.

Mark: Angus Badger, Good to see you again.

Badger: As to you Lieutenant, Glad to see you all made, In one piece.

Jack: You wouldn't believe it if we elaborated.

Toad: Jolly good to have you back chaps! Welcome to Crossover town all of you!

Mole: Here Here!

Mark:

Badger: Come, We'll show you around, The others will be waiting, Oh yes and get a cloak on the Avatar, We don't want any Excitement yet.

Aang scratched his Forehead than shrugged.

Aang: Fair enough.

Once Aang was in a Brown Cloak they all came into camp, Other heroes were scattered about, Doing random chores or other stuff.

Katara: Wow, Is this all?

Rat: Any that survived the Sack, Some of the rest are just other refugees affected by the war.

Mole: Some of them have gone into town, Your welcome to do so if you wish.

Mac: Good, I've been meaning to look up a few friends.

Mark: Jack, You take care Of Aang, Sokka and Katara, The rest of you do as you wish!

Dib: Do as wish? You mean?

Mark: Explore or something.

Vana: All right!

Eric: Yeah!

Kitty: Wooh!

Trever: Yay!

Dib: Cool.

Dipper: Nice!

Mark: Except Dipper.

Dipper: What?

Mark: We need to talk about a few things.

Dipper looked over at Dib and the others as they left, Dib looked back and Waved, Dipper waved back too.

No one noticed the Two Boys gazing sinisterly at Dipper, Before nodding to each other before scuttling off.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper sat outside a medium sized Tent, Where Badger Chiro and Antauri were inside talking With Mark, Jack Aang and Katara, He couldn't hear what they were saying so he just picked some grass out of Boredom, His mind went back to everything that happened, But most of all… Was what Ironclaw had said.

_Scratch: Ask me this boy, How long did you hope to survive? Longer than you parents did? Longer than. The Prime commander?_

_Dipper: How do you know my Parents?_

_Scratch: They never told you? Why did you think the dark lord sacked your town? Conquest? Pleasure?_

_Dipper slowly took up his blaster._

_Scratch: No… Because your parents were there… _

Dipper gasped at the Memory, What did he mean? What did his Parents ever do to… Him.

Katara came out of the tent.

Katara: Dipper, There ready to talk to you.

Dipper came over and entered, Just as Jack was showing them the Chaos Emerald.

Badger: So it's true… And the Alpha key?

Mark and Jack looked at each other.

Jack: Well… That's… Interesting.

Badger: What do you mean?

Mark: Well, During the Trip Several of Jargafars minions attacked us, They were joined by a mouse who we met at an abandoned air temple.

Jack pulled out a picture of him.

Jack: You know this "Damien Mouse?"

Antauri: Dr. Damien Martin Mouseington, A former member of the Science division, Until he defected and went mad, He disappeared six years ago.

Badger: Why was he with Jargafars Minions, And what about the Alpha key?

Aang: He was with Ironclaw when attacked us, They were after the Key, We defeated Damien and several of Jargafars officers, but We couldn't hold Scratch for long so we… May have Destroyed it.

Badger: W-What?!

Chiro: Yeah, That was our reaction to.

Jack: Plus Ironclaw died in the Process.

Mark: And fairness, Pretty generic and Pointless.

Badger: Generic and- Yeah actually it pretty much was… I suppose, Oh yes Dipper was it.

Dipper had been unnoticed the entire time.

Dipper: Yes, Sir?

Badger: You took a great risk in doing what you did, The loss of the Alpha key was a hard Sacrifice, But it was done nonetheless, You should be Honored for it.

Dipper: Thank you… Uh, Sir?

Antauri: However, There is the matter… Scratch Ironclaw.

Dipper: What about it?

Mark: Dipper, Ironclaw was Lord Jargafars second in command and you destroyed him.

Dipper: Yeah, I'm still coming to terms with that… To be honest.

Chiro: You did a great service to the Watch by killing him, The Prime commander is avenged… And Now Jargafars gonna want you dead even more now.

Dipper: Well when you put like th- Wait WHAT?!

Mark: And that's why your discharged.

Dipper: Discharged!?

Mark sighed and knelt down to his level.

Mark: Look, You've been a great help, You protected the Emerald well, Evan saved us from the Underworld, But…

Dipper: But what?

Mark: Look there are things you don't know and probably aren't ready for, Like a possibly angry dark overlord that's out to kill you.

Dipper: Yeah about that Scratch said Jargafar Attacked our town because my Parents were there, What does that mean?

Everyone looked surprised.

Mark: Scratch told you that?

Dipper: Yes.

Mark looked from Jack to badger.

Mark: Well…First off we can't answer that Dipper, Second the point is… Just follow me.

Dipper followed Mark outside the tent and went over to the side.

Mark: Look Dipper, The Journeys over, We got the Emerald and Aang somewhere safe, And well… You have been feeling tired right?

Dipper: I guess…

Mark: We're not dismissing the things you've done for everyone Dipper, It's just… Well, You've been feeling tired haven't you.

Dipper: I guess… Everything that's Happened the last two months, Everything I've been thrust into, I just maybe I need a break from it.

Mark nodded.

Mark: Well Dipper, I suppose that's what you need, That's why your out, You'll attend school here tomorrow, You've already ban in rolled somewhere and… Try not to get sucked in to the Things that go on here?

Dipper: What do you mean?

Mark: Well, I suppose you'll see, For now you'll sleep with Brian and Stewie, They'll look after you tonight.

Dipper: Why can't you?

Mark: I have… Things to take care of… Trust me, Everything will be fine.

Dipper: Okay.

Mark: Alright, Now go talk to Brian and Stewie.

Dipper walked off, As soon as he was gone, Jack came out.

Jack: You can't keep him in the dark forever, He'll learn things out himself on way or another.

Mark looked to the Ground.

Mark: Well… Then I may have to reveal his secrets, Not all of them.

Jack nodded.

Jack: So we meeting with the Mayor tomorrow.

Mark: Yeah, But first I have some Family matters To take care of Tomorrow.

**The next day.**

Dipper made sure he had everything the next day, Textbooks, Pencils Etc, Other things he would need for school, He evan got money to buy lunch.

Brian: So you know what bus stop your at?

Dipper: Yeah sure, Thanks for sheltering me.

Brain: Yeah your welcome, You might want to keep a low profile at school though, It's not every day that the kid who took out the Dark lords top guy, They might try and uh… Mooch off you?

Dipper: Really?

Brain: Trust me, It's kinda natural.

Stewie: You don't even know that for sure.

Brain: So? It's the case with Popular kids-

Dipper left the house, Deciding to let the two dish it out.

Stewie: Oh hey before you go, Watch out for that Female you! I swear there's a girl that looks like you.

Dipper heard stewie and was confused.

Dipper: _Wait… Did Stewie mean?_

As Dipper walked through the Neighborhood on his way to the Bus stop, He heard footsteps following him and a gasp, Dipper turned around…

Mabel: Dipper?!

Dipper: Mabel?!

Both twins Screamed with joy and Ran towards each other Embracing in a hug and swung around.

Dipper: Oh my gosh! You've bean here!? I-I didn't realize, I've been through alot, Nearly died several times… Have you been hearing about my travels? What have you been doing? I missed you so Much!

Mabel: I missed you too, Bro-Bro, You will not believe the things I've done.

Dipper and Mabel walked along together chatting Merily.

Dipper: So how's it bean with Uncle Henry and Aunt Valery?

Mabel: Great! They let me Keep Waddles! It took some… Convincing But they came around.

Dipper: Waddles is still around? That's wonderful! So you found "New people?"

Mabel: Heck yeah, And they're great! Well not as Great as Candy and Grenda were but, Their still cool, Oh hey there they are!

Dipper: Really? Wow more…

Dipper stopped suddenly, There at the Bus stop were Mabels Friends, Only they weren't Girls… They were Boys.

One wore a Brown coat with a Blue and Red poof ball hat, Another wore an Orange coat with a Green Ushanka, A Third one was a large fat kid in Yellow and sky blue hat similar to the First boys hat but more stretched out, And last on was dressed entirely in Orange Slightly Dirty Clothes, Mostly a Parka with a hood that covered his entire head.

Stan: Why is there a Genderbent version of the new girl?

Kyle: No Idea.

Mabel: Guys, Meet my Brother who was tragically separated from me after our Town got burned down by a Bloodthirsty madman! Dipper!

Dipper: Uh, Hi!

Mabel Dipper, Meet my guy friends! Stan!

Stan: Hi!

Mabel: kenny!

Kenny: (Mfph)

Mabel: Cartman!

Cartman: Sup!

Mabel: And Kyle!

Kyle: Aw Damn it!

Dipper: What?

Kyle: My little Brother is trying to follow me to school again!

At Kyles leg was a small Baby with a Flopping head.

Ike: Ze fu Niner!

Kyle: Ike! You can't come to school with me!

Cartman: Yeah! Go home you little dildo!

Kyle: Dude! Don't call my Brother a Dildo!

Stan: What's a dildo?

Kyle: I don't know, But I bet He doesn't know either!

Cartman: I know what it means!

Kyle: Well? What?

Cartman: I'm not telling you!

Stan: What's a dildo Kenny?

Kenny muffled something Dipper couldn't make out.

Cartman: Yep, That's what Kyle's little Brother is all right!

The other Three boys laughed, Until Kyle swung his Brother in Cartman's face, Knocking to the Ground.

Dipper: Whoa!

Stan: Sweet dude!

Dipper: Wha-?

Kyle: Yeah check this out, Ready Ike? Kick the Baby!

Ike: Don't kick the Baby!

Kyle: Kick the Baby!

Kyle Punted Ike to the Other side of the Road where he Crashed into some Mailboxes, Dipper was Horrified!

Mabel: Haha! There hilarious.

Cartman got up and yawned.

Kenny: (Whoa cartman, Looks like you didn't get enough sleep last night!)

Cartman: That's because I was having these bogus nightmares.

Kyle: Really? What about?

Cartman: Well, I dreamt I was in my bed.

**Cartman: **_In the Dark, When all of a sudden this bright big light filled the room, Than slowly my bedroom door began to open, And the Next thing I remember, I was being dragged through a hallway._

_Cartman: Week!_

**Cartman: **_And then there were these big Aliens that wanted to operate on my ass, And they had these big heads and Black eyes-_

**Flashback ends.**

Stan: Dude! Visitors!

Dipper: Huh?

Cartman: What?

Kyle: That wasn't a dream, Those were Real!

Cartman: No it was just a dream my mom said so.

Mabel: Visitors are real! Kenny's Brother said so! They kidnap people and Murder Cows.

Cartman: Shut up you guys you're just trying to make me scared!

?: Oh, Not scared enough Fatso.

The kids Turned around to find some Other Boys standing near them.

Derick: So, You're Pines huh? Heard you killed a Dangerous Villain, Pretty Famous eh?

Dipper: Uh… I…

Dipper than looked at the Four other Boys this kid was Surrounded by, One was Red haired and wore a Green shirt with Freckles on his checks, With a green sun of his Shirt and Black pants held up by a Black belt, The Second was a Smug looking boy in a Purple shirt with yellow Suspenders, and a black tie, The last two Stood between him like bodyguards, One looked like him but with a cleaner haircut, wore a blue shirt with a color and pocket and the Other had little to no hair and wore a Purple and Grey shirt with Black suspenders like the Second boy.

Derick: Oh, That's Chandler, He's Terrance and their Bill and Fosse, And I'm Richards, Derick RIchards.

Mabel cut in front of the two.

Mabel: He's not here for your shit Richards.

Derick dropped his Smirk.

Derick: Oh right, I didn't realize you were related to freaks, Like Mabel here.

Mabel: And what's that supposed to mean?!

Derick: Nothing, It's just that I didn't realize Crazed Maniacs and Nuts could be related.

Mabel: Oh yeah Well, Crazed Maniacs are creative I'll have you know, Your hair for Instance, Just makes you look like a F ?!ing Gresser.

Derick: Maybe that's just the looking I'm going for Bitch! Maybe your Parents could have at least- Oh that's right You don't-

Kenny: (That's enough!)

Derick: No one asked you to butt in Muffle boy!

And he shoved Kenny to the Ground.

Mabel: Oh no you didn't!

Before a fight could break out, A car suddenly stopped right at the Bus stop and a Man came out, A large Fat Black man with a Black beard, A chefs hat and a red shirt.

Chef: Hey Richards! That's enough of your Slander!

Derick wisely backed off as did his Minions, He and the Pines gave one last glare at each other before he slunk off.

Chef: Hello there Children.

Kids: Hey chef.

Chef: You alright?

Mabel: Yeah thanks to you, This is my Brother Dipper!

Chef: Dipper Pines?, Glad to finally meet you.

Dipper: Thanks.

Stan: Hey Chef, What's gonna be for lunch today?

Chef: Well, Today its sauce berry steak with Buttered noodles a choice of Green Bean casserole or Vegetable Medley.

Cartman: Kickass.

Chef: Say did any of you Children see the Visitors last night?

Cartman's eyes widened.

Kyle: Yeah, Cartman saw it.

Cartman: No! T-that was just a dream!

Chef: Oh was it the ones with a big Grey heads and the Black eyes?

Cartman gasped.

Stan: Yeah, they took him aboard their ship.

Chef: Oh, Did they give you an anal probe?

Dipper: A what?

Chef: That's when they put this big metal something up your butt.

Cartman: NO! I mean… Why would they do that?

Dipper: Aliens stuck something up his butt?

Cartman: Shut up!

Chef: Well I gotta get to school, You all watch Eric now he could be under alien control.

Chef turned around and the Back of his Shirt was an Alien head with the word "Believe" under it, Cartman's blood went cold.

Mabel: Wow, Sorry about your ass Cartman.

Cartman: They didn't do anything to my Ass! It was all a dream!

The Bus soon rolled up and opened the door, The kids climber aboard and met the Driver, A large Fat ugly woman with a bird in her hair.

Mabel: Good Morning miss Crabtree!

Mrs. Crabtree: Sit down! We're running late!

The kids took their seats and the Bus pulled away, Kyle looked out the window to see his Brother standing back at the bus stop.

Kyle: Damn it He's still there.

Stan: Ah relax Don't worry about him.

Kyle: No Dude! If anything happens to him, My parents are gonna kill me!

Mrs. Crabtree: Sit down back there! AAAGGGHHH!

Stan: Yeah whatever you fat bitch.

Mrs. Crabtree: WHAT DID YOU SAY!?

Stan: I-I said I have a bad itch.

Mrs. Crabtree: Oh.

Dipper: So… How long have you been hanging out with these guys?

Mabel: Since I started going to there Bus stop.

Before Dipper could say more, He heard Kyle gasp.

Kyle: Oh my God!

Dipper looked out the back window and saw it Ike held between two Aliens!

Dipper: AAAAGHH!

Stan Kenny and Mabel looked back and were Horrified.

Mabel: AGHH!

Stan: Visitors!

Kenny muffled something and pulled his hood shut.

Kyle: Ike! Stop the Bus!

Kyle got out of his seat and ran up to Mrs. Crabtree.

Kyle: Mrs. Crabtree, You have to stop the bus!

Mrs. Crabtree: Do you want an office referral!

Kyle: N-No.

Mrs Crabtree: Than sit down!

She then roared at the top of her lungs, Sending Kyle screaming back to his seat.

Mabel: Cartman! Are those the same visitors you saw!?

Cartman hadn't noticed anything that went on behind him.

Cartman: Shut up you guys this isn't working.

Kyle: Oh my God Oh my God… What do we Do, What do we do!?

Stan: Kyle, Relax, We'll get him back.

Dipper: Not really sure how, That fat bitch won't let us.

Mrs. Crabtree: What did you say!?

Mabel: Uh, He said Rabbits eat lettuce.

Mrs. Crabtree: Oh, Well yes they certainly do.

She then swerved and sent the kids flying into the Kids opposite them.

**Meanwhile.**

An alien spacecraft soared through the sky, With the people below oblivious to it, Mark walked up to a Greyish green house and knocked on the door.

?: For the last time, We did not ask for a giant trampoline again!

Mark: Who said anything about a Trampoline?

The door opened and a man appeared, He was dressed in Blue green shirt and Black trousers, And had ginger hair just like Mark, Only he also had a beard.

Harrold: Mark?

Mark: Hello little Brother.

Harrold: Mark Testaburger, It is you!

Harrold embraced his Brother in hug.

Mark: Haha, Bean a while Harrold, Bean well?

Harrold: As well as can, Come on, Come in! Come in!

Harrold Ushers Mark into the House, He took off his cloak and hung it on a Clothes Hanger, He also removed his Gauntlets too.

Harrold: Tea? Or maybe something a little stronger? Honey! Marks here.

Mark: Perhaps some Strawberry cordial?

A woman came downstairs at this, She was dressed in a White shirt and Collar, A blue Cardigan, Brown skirt and Gold earrings, She also had Black hair.

Mark: Hello Valory.

Valory: Mark, Good to see you.

Mark: Same here, Things good here?

Valory: Fine thank you.

Harold: How's life out in the field?

Mark: My head wasn't blown off, Does that count?

They all laughed, Harrold brought in two beakers and a bottle of Strawberry cordial, He undid the cap and poured into the Cups, Mark took a sip.

Mark: Ah, Good stuff.

Harrold: So I heard you brought back a few things…

Mark: Yeah, A Lot of stuff out there… You wouldn't believe it if I told you.

Valory: That intense?

Mark: Pretty much, I honestly don't know where to start, So how have things been here?

Harrold: All good, Things have been quiet-ish, A Lot of dead cows lately.

Mark: Dead cows?

Valory: Yeah, A Lot farmers have been reporting their cattle stock mauled to pieces by something, No one knows what though.

Mark pondered this.

Mark: Sounds like something funny's going on, So how's Mabel?

Harrold: She good… I think she's taken the whole… You know… Surprisingly well…

Mark looked down saldy at this…

Mark: Well… That's good for her…

Valory: She also had us… Keep the pig, He's out back now I think.

She got up to go check, Leaving Mark and Harrold alone.

Mark: So where is she?

Harrold: She went off to school.

Mark: Really? Dipper's going there too! I sent him there this morning.

Harrold; Really? That's great! They'll love seeing each other again!

Mark: I'm just worried about their assigned Teacher though…

Harrold: Really? Who's that?

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper felt he was already in a good dream turned nuts, He was placed in a fourth grade class. (Which was weird because he was thirteen.) And the teacher was an old man with a Puppet.

Mr Garrison: And now Children, Our friend Mr Hat is going to tell us all about Christopher Columbas.

Mr Hat: That's right Mr Garrison, Chrispother Columbas discovered america and was the Indians best friend! He helped the Indians win their war against Fredrick douglas and freed the Hebrews win their war against Christopher columbas.

Dipper: _This is Bullshit._

Kyle: Oh man, I can't come home without my Brother, My dad will start saying "Where's your Brother Kyle, You weren't looking out for your Brother Kyle-

Stan: Okay dude enough.

Kyle: "You know he can't think on his own yet Kyle, Wash and Floos Kyle, WHERE HAS THAT FINGER BEEN KYLE?!"

Dipper: Jesus, Issue much?!

Mr Garrison: Is there a Problem boys?

Kyle: Yes, Mr Garrison I have to go now.

Mr Garrison: Why? Another Prostate Tumor?

Kyle: No I little Brother's bean abducted by aliens.

There was a long pause and then the Kids in the Class Started laughing.

Stan: It's true! We saw it ourselves, And they gave Cartman an anal probe!

Cartman laughed Nervously.

Cartman: Hehe… That's uh, That's a little joke.

Kyle got out of his seat and went up to the front desk.

Kyle: Please Mr Garrison, I have to go, Can I please excused from class?

Mr Garrison: Hm, Well I don't know Kyle, You'll have to ask Mr Hat.

Kyle: I don't want to ask Mr Hat, I'm asking you!

Mr Garrison: No, I think you should ask Mr Hat.

Mr Hat: Yeah Kyle, Ask me.

Kyle groaned.

Kyle: Mr Hat, May I please be excused from class?

Mr Hat: Well Kyle, NO! YOU HEAR ME?! YOU GO TO HELL! YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE!

Mr Garrison: Hm, Guess you'll have to take your seat Kyle.

Kyle: Damn it!

Kyle angrily went back to his seat, Cartman laughed.

Cartman: Ha! Mr Hat yelled at you!

Than suddenly, Flames started coming out of Cartman's rectum.

Dipper: What the?!

The Flames suddenly flew out of Cartman's ass

Mabel: Oh my god! He's farting Fire!

Stan: What's going on!?

Cartman: Shut up it's nothing!

Dipper: The Probe, It must be shooting fire from His Rectum.

More flames spued out and made contact with the head of a British kid Named Pip!

Mr Garrison: Eric do you need to sit in the Corner until your Faming gas is under control?

Cartman didn't answer, Pip just ran around the Room with his head aflame!

**Meanwhile.**

Mark and Harrold Stroled outside the house together.

Harrold: So Scratch is dead?

Mark: Yes… And the Alpha key is destroyed.

Harrold: Well… That is something, And about this… Last airbender.

Mark: Ah Aang yes, I've been meaning to get to that, And this.

Mark Pulled the Chaos Emerald from his pocket and showed it to Harrold.

Harrold: Oh… This hasn't been seen since the scattering… And also those Fiascos with Chaos, The space colony ark and the Black arms invasion.

Mark: Oh yeah, I forgot about those times.

Harrold: You know Jargafar had Caer Dathyl sacked for them.

Mark: Yes, What could he want with them.

Harrold: I don't know.

Jack: Hey Mark!

Harrold and Mark looked to see Jack coming over to them, Followed by Aang and Katara.

Jack: We were just looking for you.

Aang: Whoa Another Mark?

Mark: Oh right, Kids meet my Brother Mark.

Harrold: Hello.

Mark: Harrold You know Jack, These are Aang and Katara.

Katara: Pleased to meet you.

Aang: Hey.

Harrold: Well I never… An Airbender? After all this time.

Jack: He's also the Avatar.

Harrold Gasped.

Harrold: No…

Aang: Yeah I am.

Harrold: Oh my god…

Before anything more could be said, A herd of Cows stampede past, Followed by a cop car.

Officer Barbrady: Come back here cows!

Katara: Uh, What was that?

Jack: Usual Crazies…

**Meanwhile.**

It was lunch time now and it was packed with Kids eating, Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny were lined up waiting for lunch, Some kids were looking at Dipper others were talking to each other.

Jewish kid: So than I had bad Gas.

Jason: Yeah super sweet killer.

Cartman let out a Flaming gas cloud out.

Cartman: Man, I sure am hungry.

Dipper: How can you eat when your farting fire?

Cartman: Shut up Asshole.

A boy came up behind Cartman, He wore a Sky Blue Shirt, Dark green pants, and Blonde hair that looked like a tuft.

Butters: Uh, Hi there you Dipper pines?

Dipper: Uh yeah?

Butters: Well, I'm Leopald, But everybody calls me Butters, I wanted to ask, Is it true?

Dipper: Is what true?

Butters: That your the guy who took out Scratch Ironclaw?

Mabel: You better believe it.

Dipper: Mabel…

Butters: Wow, That's awesome! We should be friends, That Way I would get picked on less.

Dipper: Uh, Okay…?

?: Oh my god It's him!

Two girls immediately went up to Dipper with wide eyes, One wore a red Coat with Frizzy blonde hair, And the other wore a Dark blue Coat with Red hair.

Red: OMG It is him! The kids who Killed Scratch Ironclaw!

Bebe: You've Avenged us! You've Avenged us All!

Mabel: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! Ladies ease off, You already know my Brother.

Bebe: This kids your Brother.

Dipper: You should have already known that…

Bebe and Red were his Cousins best Friends, Who came with her during one of her visits to Piedmont, Dipper remembered to have not liked Bebe, Considering her to be Prissy and Stupid Girls, Who Red seamed more tombayish.

Kyle: So what do you guys want?

Bebe: Oh right, Stan this is for you.

Red: Yeah from your love interest.

Bebe handed stan a note and the two girls giggled away.

Dipper: Love interest?

Mabel: Yeah should have mentioned that by now.

Butters: Well geez what does the note say?

Stan read the note.

Stan: Holy crap! It says she wants to meet me at Starks pond, After school!

Mabel: Wow, Maybe you could kiss her.

Kyle: Or slip on her tongue.

Kenny muffled something else.

Stan: What? How do you know she has a Cat?

Kenny shrugged.

Cartman: That's never gonna happen, You just throw up when she talks to you.

Stan: No I don't!

Mabel: Yeah you do.

Dipper: Uh who are you talking about?

Mabel: You'll see…

Dipper: What's that supposed to-

Kyle: We don't have time for this, We need to find a way out of school to get my little brother back!

The line moved up and the kids were met with Chef.

Chef: Hello there Children.

Kids: Hey chef.

Chef: How are you doing?

Kyle: Bad.

Chef: Why bad?

Kyle: Chef? Have you ever had something happen to you? But nobody believed you?

Chef: Oh Children, That's a problem we all have to face in life, Hear let me sing you a little song about it.

On que, Music started playing out of nowhere and chef started swaying back and forth.

Chef: _**I'm gonna make love to ya Woman! **_

_**Gonna lay you down by the Fire!**_

_**And Carrese your womanly body!**_

_**Make you moan and Perspire!**_

_**Gonna get those juices**_

Stan: Uh Chef.

_**Flowin, We make love baby.**_

Stan: Chef?

_**Love Baby, Love Baby**_

_**Love Love Love Love**_

_**BABY!**_

Stan: CHEF!

Chef stopped singing.

Chef: Uh, Do you feel better?

Kyle: No!

Dipper: What the Hell kind of song was that?!

Chef: Oh come on What could possibly be so wrong? It's sauceberry stake day.

Mabel: The Aliens took Kyle's baby Brother.

Chef: What?!

Chef Ran up in front of them.

Chef: What the Hell are you kids doing here eating sauceberry stake, Go find him Damn it!

Dipper: We can't, Mr Garrison won't let us, He thinks we're making it up.

Cartman: You are making it up.

And a bout of Flame erupt from Cartman's Ass and a Long Metallic something came out, It had two arms and a large Eye like head, Cartman barely noticed it.

Mabel: Woah! Awesome!

The thing retreated back in Cartman's ass.

Cartman: What?

Kyle: What was that.

Chef turned Cartman around and Looked at his Ass.

Chef: It was some kind of Symbiotic metamorphic size device, It could mean the visitors want to communicate with us.

Butters: Wow,

Cartman turned around a scowled

Cartman: Oh I see, So you guys are gonna join in on the little joke huh?

Chef: It's no joke children, This is big!

Kyle: But how do we get Ike back, If I don't, My parents are gonna Slaughter me.

Chef thought for a moment.

Chef: Well you might as well talk that Out with Mr Mackey, The School counselor.

**Later.**

Mr Mackey: I'm tired of Seeing you in my office, You get sent here Every day Craig!

Craig: I know.

Mr Mackey: Why can't you behave?

Craig: I don't know.

Mr Mackey: Well, I tell you what, If you don't shape up, M'kay and behave, Your gonna be held back a grade if-

Craig flipped him off Mid sentence.

Mr Mackey: Did you just flip me off?!

Craig: No.

Mr Mackey: Yes you did you just flipped me the bird, Now see this is what-

Craig flipped him off again.

Mr Mackey: There you just did it again!

Craig: No I didn't.

Mr Mackey: Yes you did and until you stop flipping people off you can just go back in line next!

Craig got out of his seat and went to the door, At that moment, Dipper, Mabe, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny and Butters came in.

Mr Mackey: Hello kids, M'kay.

Butters: Hey Craig.

Craig said nothing, He just flipped off Dipper as he went out.

Mabel: It's his thing.

Mr Mackey: M'kay, Now you must be the new kid, Dipper is it, Well I'm Counselor Mackey, M'kay and if you-

Dipper: Thank you but, We kinda have other Problems.

Mr Mackey: What kind?

Stan: Kyle's farting fire and Aliens kidnapped Kyle's brother.

Mr Mackey: What?

Cartman: Don't believe them Mr Mackey, They're just trying to

Cartman Farted more fire out his Rectum.

Mr Mackey: Oh My! M'kay, Uh, Eric you should probably go home, Until you get that Under control.

Kyle: And what about me?

Mr Mackey: Well Kyle, I highly doubt live aliens abducted your brother, M'kay, He could simply be lost, M'kay, Or probably at home, In fact maybe I could call-

Kyle: NO Don't!

Mackey stopped before he could pick up the phone.

Stan: Listen Sir, If it's alright with you we'll just… Take Cartman home ourselves.

Mr Mackey: Hm, I'm not sure that's something students should be allowed to do, That's more of an adult thing and-

Cartman Farted Fire once more, THis time it set a bookcase alight, Mackey fell out of his chair in alarm.

Mr Mackey: Oh Jesus, Uh Go right ahead kids get him out of here! M'kay!

The kids Scrambled out of the Office as fast as they could.

Mr Mackey: Somebody call 911!

**Meanwhile.**

The Testaburgers, Jack, Aang and Katara rode down town in the Tesaturgers car.

Katara: I gotta say this town doesn't seem half bad.

Aang: Where are we going again?

Jack: Badger wants us to Present you to the Mayor, I told you this off screen.

Aang: Oh yeah.

Mark: What for though?

Valory: It's the Richards, Their at it again.

Katara: The Who?

Harrold: Basically the Malfoys if they were more like House Bolton from Game of Thrones.

Valory: Mrs Richards is before the City Council now, This time the Familys attacking the Royal Council openly.

Mark: And us too no doubt.

Jack: If you ask me, They should have locked up in Caer Ungol years ago.

Mark: Perhaps, But nothing will come of it, Richards are more Politician than Fighters.

Harrold: Or the other way around, Depending on what you hear or Believe.

Mark: Either way there dangerous… Especially with their… Ties.

The Car soon came up to the Mayor's Office.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Butters and Cartman trudged along, THe latter kids save for Dipper singing merrily.

Kids: _**We got out of school, No more school today!**_

As they sang another verse, Cartman farted Flames once again.

Cartman: AH! My ass, You guys Seriously!

Dipper: Man, It's getting worse by the Minute.

Butters: What do we do?

Kyle: You think we could use it to get my Little Brother back?

Cartman growled.

Cartman: Would stop going on about your little Brother!? I know it was just a dream, I know I don't hav an Anal Probe and I am not Under Alien Control!

**(Zap)**

Cartman: _**I love to singa, About the Moona and the Juna and the Springa,**_

_**I love to singa, About a sky of blue or a tea for two-**_

**(Zap)**

The other kids Stared on in shock.

Stan: What the Heck was that?!

Mabel: He is under alien control!

Dipper: Yeah that thing in his Butt is linked up to the Visitors!

Carmtan: Shut up already I'm not under alien control!

Kyle just walked up and Shouted in Cartmans ear.

Kyle: HEY! IF YOU VISITORS CAN HEAR ME! BRING ME BACK MY BROTHER GOD DAMN IT!

Suddenly, An alien spacecraft came out of the Sky.

Dipper: Oh my god…

Stan: It's them!

Kyle: Give me back my Brother!

Dipper: Mabal do you have Camera on you?

Mabel: I have a phone.

Dipper: Good.

But suddenly Kyle threw a rock at the Spaceship and it bounced off, In retaliation, THe Ship fired and Hit Kenny, Sending him flying into the Road.

Stan: Oh my god! They killed Kenny!

Kyle: You Bastards!

The ship than flew off.

Kyle: Come back here COME BACK!

Dipper: Damn it! We were so close!

Butters: Uh Not really.

Stan: Hey look, Kennys alright!

Kenny stood back up and called after the other kids, Than got stampeded by a bunch of Cows, He got back up, Only to be run over by a Police Car.

Officer Barbrady: I'll get you cows!

The kids walked over to his Mangled body, Dipper and Butters were the most Horrified.

Dipper: Oh my god…

Mabel: Poor Kenny.

Stan: Now do you believe us Cartman?

Cartman: No.

Kyle: What?! But they killed Kenny.

Cartman: He's not dead!

Mabel: He is too! Kenny's dead!

She picked up a stick and poked Kenny with it.

Mabel: See?

Cartman: GOD DAMN IT I DIDN"T HAVE AN ANAL PROBE!

Kyle: He's dead Cartman!

Kyle pulled Kennys head to Emphasize!

Dipper: Dear lord!

Cartman: You know what? Screw you guys I'm going home!

Kyle: Go home than you fat chicken! You guys are all I have left now.

Stan: Sorry dude, I gotta get to Stark's pond.

And Stan walked off.

Kyle: Oh come on! What about Ike? He must be so scared, Up there all alone.

Dipper: Without someone Kicking him into Mailboxes.

Kyle: Huh?

Dipper: You don't actually care about your Brother do you?

Kyle: I- I Of course I care!

Dipper: No you don't! Your just scared Your Parents will hurt you if your not with him!

Mabel: Not exactly a bad thing.

Dipper: If you want him back, Get him yourself! Don't drag us around to be Blasted! C'mon guys.

And with that, Dipper, Mabel and Butters followed after Stan.

Kyle: Rats.

**Meanwhile.**

Aang, katara, Jack and the Testaburgers walking into the Building as they heard a woman's voice!

Mrs Richards: This Defensive is Suicide! The watch has Proven themselves a fail order of Weaklings, The Sack of their home is proof enough!

Mark: Uh Huh, Definitely Mrs Richards, With the words of her husband too.

They reached the door.

Jack: Wait listen.

Jack pressed his Ear against the door.

Gerald: Some of them Killed Scratch Ironclaw, The very Creature that led the Sack.

Mrs. Richards: So what? We have no proof of this, And Neither does the Royal Council, Which brings us to another thing! Their Cowardice does us no favors either.

Mayor Mcdaniels: In hindsight They have our own lands to consider, Especially after Jargafars capture of Agrabah.

At this, Jack opened the door and walked in with the others.

Linda: If anything we need the Freedom watch If Jargafar turns his sights on us.

Mrs. Richards: Than perhaps we should seek out his Rivals for help.

Sheila: Side with Villains?!

Skeeter: Unspeakable!

Randy: Have you no sense?! They cannot be trusted?

Srg Yates: Who would you seek help from uh? Maleficent? The Horned king? Frollo?

Mrs Richards: Hear me! We cannot rely on the Defensive forever, A superior arsonal is all we can hope for! If not than we-!

She stopped when she saw who was behind her, Mrs Richards and Black hair and Dark brown eyes, She wore a Black Dress with a tint of Blue, Her skin indicated she was of Latino descent and yet her Accent sounded Uncharacteristically English.

Mrs Richards: Ah, We were just talking about you.

Mark: That's refreshing Mavis usually your Preaching about us.

A few Sniggering From the Council was heard.

Mark: Mayor McDanials, We have something to Present.

Aang emerged from behind Valory.

Mavis: Who's this? Some Buddhits spouting namaste?

Aang: Okay first off, I'm not a Buddhits, Fuck those posers and second I'm Aang, The Last airbender.

A collective gasp and Murmur rose from the Council.

Sgt Yates: There are no Airbenders.

Jack: This one is, And the Avatar to boot.

Mavis: Ha! Avatar? Is this some pretenders joke?

Sheila: Send him away!

Skeeter: Let's get back to business!

Valory: Wait! Wait this is the Avatar!

Aang: I can prove it to, Watch this…

There was a long pause and then… Aang did that stupid Kyosji Island trick.

Mayor McDaniels: What… What is that?

Mark: Its airbending.

Gerald: So he is an airbender?

Harrold: Uh… Yeah.

Jack: He did a lot more powerful airbending on the Journey trust me.

Linda: So it's true than? Ironclaw is dead?

Mark: Yes and as to the Journey-

**Meanwhile.**

Cartman came home and slammed the door behind him.

Liane: Hello Eric.

Cartman: Hi mom.

Liane: How was school.

Cartman: It left me pissed off.

Liane: Here, I made you powdered donut cupcake surprise.

Cartman: I don't want Powdered donut cupcake surprise, Everyone at school called me fat!

Liane: Your not fat, Your big boned.

Cartman: That's what I said.

Liane: You can have an Incy Wincy bit can't you?

Cartman: No!

Liane: Just a wincy incy woo woo?

Cartman: No Leave me alone!

Cartman than brushed past his Mother.

Liane: How about a nice chocolate chip and pot pie than?

Cartman stopped when he heard this.

Cartman: I guess that sound pretty good.

He hopped on the couch, While his mom went to the Kitchen.

Cartman: Oh and mom?

Liane: Yes hon?

Cartman: If Kyle or the New kid comes over, I'm not here okay?

Liane: Sure, You want some cheesy poofs?

Cartman: Yeah I want cheesy poofs.

**Meanwhile at Starks pond.**

It was the time after school and Stan was at Starks pond, Soon joined by Dipper, Mabel, Butters and Kyle, The pond was a large lake with a Large forest off to the side, They were standing near a bench not far from a sign with the Lakes name and an old tree.

Butters: Well geez, Guess she's not coming Stan.

Stan: But her note said she'd be here.

Dipper: Okay seriously who is your love interest?

Mabel: Yeah I probably should have mentioned this before.

Mabel took Dipper to the Side.

Mabel: You know Wendy right?

Dipper: Of course I know Wendy, How could I not-

Mabel: Not that Wendy.

Dipper: What do you mean not that-?

?: You wanna stop talking in corners?

Behind them was a girl around Stan, Kyle and Butters age, Clad in a Purple coat, Yellow pants and a pink berat.

Dipper: Wendy.

Dipper deadpand and came over to the scowling girl.

Wendy: Mason Dipper.

Dipper: Wendy testaburger.

Mabel: Yep, That's our cousin folks.

Butters: You're her Cousin?

Dipper: So, Your looking nice.

Wendy: Still gushing over "Mysteries."

Dipper: Yeah, Still Fighting over "Girls rights" Or, Something?

Wendy: Women's rights.

Dipper: Yeah, Yeah…

Wendy: …

After a few Moments the Two started laughing and Wendy jumped into Dippers arms.

Wendy: It's wonderful to see you again Dipper!

Dipper: Haha! You know I barely managed to Remember you.

Butters: Wait, Do they hate each other or?

Mabel: No There cool.

Stan: He's her cousin?!

Wendy: Oh right Hi Stan.

Stan than vomited.

Wendy: Ew!

Mabel: Yeah you can't talk to Stan Wendy, He throws up when you do.

Wendy: Why Stan?

Stan threw up again.

Wendy: Ew!

Mabel: Comedy!

Stan: Wait, That's the kid who throws up on her?

Kyle: Okay enough! You and Stan just get this over with so we can go find my Brother?

Wendy: Why what happened?

**Meanwhile.**

Cartman sat in his eating cheesy poofs and watching the news.

TV Anchor: We will continue to cover the Story of the Horned King's growing political and military might, In other news as more UFO sightings increase, More mysterious patterns begin to appear all around Crossover town, In crop circles which when viewed from above, From Strange patterns.

The Camera panned up to show Cartman's image in the form of a Crop circle.

Cartman: Huh, That kinda looks like… Tom sallic.

News Anchor: Could it be that More Aliens are trying to make contact with us here on Earth?

As the news went on, Cartman's cat slunk over purring in a pleading manor

Mr Kitty: Meow.

Cartman: No kitty, This is my pot pie!

Mr Kitty: Meow.

Cartman: No Kitty that's a bad Kitty,

Mr Kitty: Meow!

Cartman: No Kitty it's mine!

Mr Kitty: Hiss!

Cartman: MOM! Mr Kitty's being a dildo!

Liane: Well I know a certain kitty kitty who's sleeping with Mommy tonight.

Cartman: What?

**Meanwhile.**

Mayor McDaniels: So it's true, the Avatar has Returned.

A collective "Awe." Was heard.

Mavis: Well, I think I speak for all of us when I say, Welcome Avatar, Your Presence emboldens us all in these dark times.

Aang: Thank you.

Mayor McDaniels: So Lieutenant, What about the Emerald.

Mark: It will kept under our watch until This Council decides what to do with it.

Gerald: Hm, A wise course of Action.

Skeeter: Here, here.

As the Meeting went on, Jack and Katara noticed Mavis slink out of the room, With a dark scowl.

Jack: Hmm, She's up to something, I can feel it.

**Meanwhile.**

Kyle: And now I have to go home without him, And My Parents are gonna kill me.

Wendy: Well, Why don't you get Cartman?

Kyle: Huh?

Butters: Why?

Wendy: Well, If Cartman has something stuffed up his Ass, Maybe the Visitors are using him as part of their plan.

Mabel: What are you saying.

Wendy: We should use Cartman as bait to bring the Visitors back.

Kyle: Hey! Your Right Wendy, C'mon you guys we have to go get Cartman!

Kyle than hurried off, Wendy followed.

Wendy: C'mon Stan!

Stan barfed on the Back of Wendy!

Wendy: Ew!

Dipper: C'mon you.

Dipper grabbed Stans Arm and pulled him along, Mabel and Butters followed.

**Later.**

At Cartman's house, Mr Kitty was still begging for Pot pie.

Mr Kitty: Meow.

Cartman: NO Kitty, You can't have any!

Mr Kitty: Meow.

Cartman: NO KITTY THAT'S A BAD KITTY!

Than Cartman Farted Flames that set Mr Kitty alight and he shot off like a flaming rocket, All over the House.

Cartman: Excuse me Kitty.

Liane opened the Door and Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Wendy and Butters entered.

Liane: Eric, Look who's here.

Cartman: Oh God…

Mabel: C'mon Cartman! We're gonna go play at the Bus stop!

Cartman: I can't my mom says-

Liane: That's okay Eric, I think you need to spend time with your little Friends.

Cartman: But Mom, I don't want to spend time with my-

Liane: Don't be difficult Eric!

Cartman: Okay.

Cartman than sulked after the other kids.

Cartman: THis better be fun.

Dipper: Oh it will, it will.

And with that, They kids left the House, Unaware of Lianes eyes fixed on Dipper and Mabel.

Liane: Does Randy know…?

**Later.**

That night, They tied Cartman up to a Tree on the Outskirts of town near the Freedom watch encampment.

Cartman: You guys! I need to get home!

Butters: Don't worry Eric, This rope will make sure you're not taken on board again.

Cartman tugged at the Rope for a while.

Mabel: How come the Visitors Aren't coming for him?

Dipper: I don't know, Maybe we should signal them somehow.

Cartman once again passed flaming gas.

Wendy: Maybe like that?

Kyle: Hey yeah, ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS FART SOME MORE CARTMAN!

Cartman farted again, But this Time, Something more Happened, As Cartman Farted a Large satellite Dish emerged and Transformed behind him, Cartman didn't notice.

Stan: WHOA!

Mabel: Now do you believe us Cartman!

Cartman: You guys can't scare me! I know you're making it all up!

Dipper: Making it all- There's a giant satellite Dish emerging from your Ass!

Cartman: Sure you guys Whatever!

The Satellite dish fired a beam into space, It could be scene for miles around

Mr Garrison: I tell you there's some crazy stuff going on in this town.

Mr Hatt: You can say that again Mr Garrison.

Back with the Kids, Before Cartman could say another word Several Alien spacecraft appeared over him.

Kyle: Come down here you stinking aliens!

As if on Cue, The visitors came down from their ship, Kyle Stuttered.

Stan: Go on Dude.

Kyle: Uh… Visitors, This morning you took my Brother Ike, He's the little Freckled kid that looks like a football, At first I was happy you took him away, But I've learned something today, That having a little Brother is a pretty special thing, Aw Heck Mr visitors I'm just a kid all alone in this Crazy world But if you could find it in your Hearts or whatever you have to give my Brother back to me, It sure would make my life brighter again.

Stan: That was beautiful dude.

Kyle: Did it work.

THe Visitors turned to leave.

Dipper: No it didn't.

Wendy: HEY YOU SCRAWNY SHITS! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU MUST BE SOME **BEEP** TO BE ABLE TO IGNORE A CRYING CHILD!

Stan: WOW!

Mabel: Yeah!

Dipper: You go Cous!

Wendy: YOU KNOW WHAT YOU BEEP LIKE? YOU LIKE TO **BEEP** AND **BEEP** AND **BEEP** AND **BEEP!**

Butters: Hey Fellers, What's a BEEP?

Dipper: You don't want to know.

On the Spaceship, A door opened and Ike Appeared.

Kyle: IKE! Jump down! NOW!

Before Ike could, A herd of Cattle appeared out of nowhere in front of the Visitors, mooing in Terror, Than one of the Visitors raised his hand and said.

Visitor: Moo!

The cows perked up.

Visitor: ( Greetings cows of Earth, We come in peace.)

Cows: (Really?)

Visitors: (We have Experimented with All the beings of Earth that didn't try and Kill us and we have determined you to be the most intelligent of all.)

Cartman: What the Hell are they talking about?

Cows: (Than why have you been killing us?)

Visitors: (Sorry about that, That was Carl, He's new.)

Carl: (Yeah, Sorry about that.)

The lead visitor presented a device.

Visitors: (Here take this, It's a gift, To symbolize peace between our Species, Farewell Cows, Peace be with you.)

The Visitors returned to their ship, Unaware that Ike had Escaped, They also Beamed up Cartman.

Cartman: WEEK!

And with that, The ship flew away into the Stars.

Butters: Whew, I'm sure glad that's over with.

Kyle: C'mon Ike, We better get home, I think we can make it in time for Dinner.

And with that, Kyle and Ike headed off for home.

Stan: Thanks for your help Wendy.

Wendy: Whatever Dude.

Stan: Hey! I didn't throw up!

Wendy: Cool!

Romantic music played in the Background As Stan and Wendy inched closer to kiss… However.

Stan: BAUGH!

Wendy: Ew!

Stan: Sorry.

Dipper: Okay seriously, They just got introduced and Already they're established as a couple?

Mabel: Meh that's love life!

After that, Stan and Wendy became a Couple and the Latter, Along with Dipper and Mable went home together.

Mabel: Wow, What day right Guys?

Dipper: Yeah, It sure has, Hope Cartamsn okay though.

Wendy: Who cares?

Mabel: Hey Dipper, I just realized something.

Dipper: _That Wendy's new Boyfriend has the same name as Grunkle Stan?_

Mabel: Yeah, And you never told me about your adventures.

Dipper Paused as they reached the House.

Dipper: Well, I think that's… Something I might leave to Uncle Mark.

As they Entered the House, They found Mark, Harrold and Valory waiting.

Mark: Just where have you kids bean all day?

Wendy ran into Mark's arms and Hugged him, Waddles ran into the Room and Tackled Mabel and Dippers head was Ruffled by Harrold, Merriment rang through the House and into the Night.

**Meanwhile.**

The Dark lord Stared down at the scrap of an arm on the Dias and than to Eggamn Tak and Cluny.

Eggman: My lord, As sad as this- AGH!

Eggman was blasted through a Wall by a blast of Black power, Causing Tak and Cluny to Cringe as Jargafar rose and removed his hood, His head still in shadows and his red eyes glaring Balefully.

Lord Jargafar: Fine, I'll get them Myself.

**To be Continued.**

**Well, Here it is folks, The First Episode of Season 2, Sorry If I sidelined many of the Character you've come to love, But I've been wanting to get to Mabel Brian Stewie and Wendy for a long time, And some more Characters too, Maybe a Certain Blonde as well, Stay tuned for more and Watch out for the Next Chapter in South Park the Dark time comes!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Episode 24**

**Scuzzlebutt.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, While Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman look on blankly at the bus stop.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

It had been a week since Cartman had Miraculously returned from space, And now he was waiting outside his House with his Mother.

Liane: Now you be careful Eric, The woods can be Dangerous.

Cartman: Okay Mom.

Just than a jeep Pulled up with two men and Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Wendy inside.

Mabel: Hey Cartman! Ready to go Hunting?

Stan: Yeah, My uncle Jimbo says we gotta get up there Early, Right Uncle Jimbo.

Jimbo was a Portly man, With Orange Hunting clothes and a dark Green jacket.

Jimbo: That's Right Stanley, Non intelligent Animals are much easier to shoot in the Morning.

Liane handed Cartman a bag of Food.

Liane: Here hon, I packed you some cheesy poof and Happy tarts.

Jimbo: Don't worry Miss Cartman, We'll take good Care of him, I bright my Old war buddy Ned to keep things safe.

Ned was a Short man than Jimbo with a Large Oval like head, One Arm and Glasses that cover his eyes, In his one Arm he Held a Microphone.

Ned: Hmm, Hello Mrs Cartman how are you today?

Cartman was soon in the Jepp.

Liane: Be sure to use lots of Bugs spray and If you have to Poo Poo, Don't wipe with Poison Ivy.

The other Kids laughed at Cartman's Embarrassment.

Cartman: Dude that's sick Mom!

Liane: And I know it can get scary up in those woods, But just remember, Mommies not far away.

The Kids laughed again.

Cartman: Drive Drive!

Jimbo did as Cartman wanted, Leaving behind a Waving Liane.

Kyle: Don't get scared up in the Mountains Cartman.

Cartman: Shut up!

Stan: Maybe your Mom can give me a kiss to Cartman.

Wendy: Yeah- What?

Kenny than Muffled something.

Jimbo: Oh Ho! That's disgusting!

Cartman: You piece of Crap, I'll kill you!

Cartman began punching Kenny, Who punched back.

Jimbo: That's the Spirit Kids, Get that old Testosterone flowing.

Cartman raised his fist for another Punch.

Jimbo: Now Kids, I need to get Serious for a minute, I need you to Understand the Basic Rules of Hunting since this is your first time, First off don't ever walk with your gun unless the Safetys on, Secondly, Don't shoot anything that Stands on two legs or Talks and Lastly, Never spill your bear on the Boy chamber.

Dipper: Uh… Mr Kern, We don't drink bear.

Jimbo: You don't?

Ned: Oh that's right, Children from ages 9 to 13 don't drink beer.

Mabel: I like Chocolate milk with Sprinkles!

Jimbo: Well, We'll be doing plenty of Hunting on this trip, After all Hunting sober is like… Fishing.

Mabel: Fishings fun.

The Jeep Traveled up a nearby Hill and they were soon in the Woods.

Jimbo: Well, here we are.

The kids climbed out of the Jeep.

Jimbo: Okay now, Each of you Youngins take a gun, A bear and some smokes.

Ned handed Eacho the Gun the listed Items.

Cartman: Hey! I didn't get a Gun.

Jimbo Handed Cartman a More modern Gun.

Cartman: Sweet, This is just like the gun I used in Nam.

Wendy: What? You weren't in Vietnam.

Ned: Hmm, Were you stationed in denaine?

Stan: Cartman always makes stuff up Ned you can't believe him.

Cartman: Hey, I'll blow your freaking head off!

Dipper: Whoa Jesus!

Jimbo hurried over and Grabbed Cartman's bear.

Jimbo: Hey look out son that's dangerous! You could have spilled your bear!

Wendy: Are you Serious?!

**Later.**

Jimbo, Ned and the kids trekked along through the Woods.

Stan: My uncle says that after this, He'll take me hunting in Africa.

Kyle: Wow, That would be cool.

Cartman: My mom says there's a lot of Black people in Africa.

Wendy: And what's that supposed to mean?

Dipper: Wendy he's not worth it.

Jimbo suddenly called the boys up.

Jimbo: Kids Lookie there!

A large bear was walking on a Rock.

Jimbo: That there is a Rocky mountain black bear, One of the few Remaining of its kind, Isn't it beautiful?

Mabel: Wow… So majestic.

Wendy: So rare…

Dipper pulled out a camera.

Dipper: So much Na-

Jimbo: LOOK OUT IT'S COMING RIGHT FOR US!

Jimbo fired his Gun at the Bear sending it flying out of Sight!

Dipper: What the?!

Stan: It wasn't' coming right for us it was just sitting there!

Jimbo Shushed him

Jimbo: Not so loud! That was just a technicality.

Dipper: A technicality?! What are you talking about?!

Jimbo: You see kids, The Democrats have passed a lot of laws trying to stop us Hunters from hunting.

Cartman: Democrats piss me off.

Wendy: You don't even know what Democrats are.

Jimbo: They say we can't shoot non-Anthro Animals anymore, Unless there posing an Immediate threat, There for, Before we shoot something, We have to say, "It's coming right for us!"

Dipper: Uh… Ha exactly does that work?

Ned: Hmm, Jimbo look!

A dear trotted into view.

Jimbo: Oh look it's a dear! Looks like about a fort six incher Ned.

Suddenly Jimbo pulled out a Bazooka!

Jimbo: IT'S COMING RIGHT FOR US!

Jimbo fired the Rocket and blew the Deer to bits!

Cartman: Kick ass!

Stan, Dipper, Mabel and Wendy were Horrified.

Jimbo: Did you see that? I was prepared for the Ferousis Charging buck!

Ned: Hmm, Rabbit Rabbit! Five o'clock!

A small brown Rabbit hopped into plain sight.

Wendy: Oh no, Don't you-

Jimbo and Ned fell flat on their Stomachs and crawled after the Rabbit.

Jimbo: Let's move! MOVE!

THe kids followed after.

Stan: Is this Hunting?

Wendy: What do you think?!

Cartman: Aw Dude, I'm starting to have flashbacks.

Dipper: What?

Kyle: Huh?

Cartman: Stand forth, Pull left flank, Look out for Charlie's up in the Trees.

Soon, Jimbo, Ned and the kids moved into position, To see the Rabbit sitting still near a flower.

Jimbo: This one's yours Stan.

Stan pulled up his Gun up and took aim.

Jimbo: It's coming right for us.

Ned: It's coming right for us.

Stan closed his left eye in concentration.

Kyle: Shoot it Stan!

Cartman: I got your back soldier.

Wendy: Stan don't.

Stan eventually lowered his Gun.

Stan: I can't.

The Rabbit hopped away

Jimbo: What the- What's wrong with you?

Stan: I didn't wanna shoot the Bunny.

Jimbo: What the hell do you mean you don't want to shoot the Bunny? You're Babbling Your Hysterical, Your not making any sense.

Wendy: He said he didn't want to shoot the Bunny.

Jimbo got up and waved his gun.

Jimbo: No nephew of mine is gonna be a tree Hunger!

Cartman: Yeah Hippie, Go back to woodstock if you can't shoot anything.

Stan: I'll shoot you!

Cartman: I can shoot you too!

Stan: I'll kill you!

Cartman: I'll pump you full of led!

Dipper: Dear God! Stop!

Mabel: I… Had no Idea Hunting was so…

Suddenly a rumbling shook the Ground.

Wendy: What was that?

**Meanwhile.**

At a Geologist Station a Man with Black hair and Mustache was boardly looking at some readings, Suddenly they began to pick up speed.

Randy: What the heck is this?

Randy rolled his chair over to a phone and called.

Randy: Hey, Nelson, It's Randy, Listen uh… The little needles moving really fast, What does that mean? Uh huh, Uh huh.

Randy looked out the Window to see a smoking Mountain.

Randy: Yeah it's smoking, Uh huh, OH Really? Really? Oh my god… A VOLCANO!

**Meanwhile.**

That night, The Kids, Jimbo and Ned had set up camp, They were currently smoking Hot dogs by a fire.

Cartman: This weiners won't cook.

Ned; Hmm, This wood won't burn.

Jimbo pulled out a bottle of Gin.

Jimbo: Looks like we'll have to use the old indian fire trick.

Ned picked up a Barrel of Gasoline and Poured it on the fire, It caught light and blew up in his face, He caught fire and Started Running and Rolling all over the Place, jimbo laughed.

Jimbo: HAHAHA! Hey Stop Drop and roll Ned HaHaha!

Ned hit the barrel with his foot and slipped it's contents, Which trekked towards the Jeep and blew it up.

Jimbo: God Damn it Ned I just got that Jeep! Now how are we supposed to get home?!

Dipper: Dude! He's on fire for God's sake!

Cartman held his Hot dogs over Neds buring form.

CartmanL Hey guys, This roasts pretty good now.

**Meanwhile.**

Badger: Perhaps we should consider reaching out to the Royal council again?

Mayor McDaniels: We can't exactly reach them at this time, However we-

Before the Mayor could continued the Speaker spoke.

Aide: Uh, Mayor, Randy Marsh is here to see you.

Mayor McDaniels: Send him in.

Randy ventured into the Room with a Board.

Randy: Mayor we've got a big Problem, Mount Evison is about to Erupt!

Mayor McDaniels: What?!

Badger: Are you serious man?!

Randy set up the Graph.

Randy: Afraid Not, This Graph shows everything from normal to bad, Right now Crossover town is here!

**Totally screwed.**

Mayor McDaniels: Dear god!

Badger: Oh no! Randy some of the Children are out camping with your Brother Right now!

Randy: What?!

Mayor McDaniels: Johnson! Johnson! Muster a Rescue team, And get Any available Freedom watchers on the line!

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo: And then, Ned picked up the Grenade and- BOOM! Blasted his arm clean off, We spent three hours looking for that arm, But it was never found again, Some say it still crawling around to this day.

Ned jumped at Cartman with a fake arm! Causing him to yelp, The other kids laughed.

Cartman: Heh, That wasn't scary.

Mabel: You were too, You almost peed your pants!

Cartman: No I didn't!

Jimbo: Hey Ned, You wanna toss me another beer?

Ned reached inside the cooler and pulled out a Gin, Which he tossed to Jimbo.

Jimbo: You kids wanna try one out?

Kyle: No thanks, That stuff tastes like Pee.

Mabel: Yeah, Squirrel Pee.

Jimbo: What's the Matter with ya? Can't you try a little alcohol?

Kenny sat near the Gasoline Barrel and Drank right out of it from the tube.

Jimbo: Christ look at that Little bastard go!

Kenny finished drinking the Gasoline.

Jimbo: Now you see Stan? That is a dirty little bastard.

Stan: Hey, I'm a dirty little bastard too.

Cartman: Hey guys, I know a scary story.

Kyle: Shut up Cartman you can't scare anybody.

Cartman: Oh yeah? Have you guys ever heard of-

Cartman turned on a flashlight.

Cartman: Scuzzlebutt?

Mabel: The Wha Wha?

Cartman: Scuzzlebutt is a creature that lives up on this very mountain, And kills anybody that dares come to the top.

Dipper: Wow, Really why?

Cartman: Because, It loves the taste of Blood, And likes to add pieces to his deformed body.

Mabel: Deformed How.

Cartman: Well, on his left Arm, He has.

Stan: A hook.

Kyle: A knife.

Cartman: No, A piece of Celery.

Wendy: Celery?

Cartman: Yes, And he walks with one leg, Because the other is missing, And where it should be, There's nothing but, Patrick duffy.

Wendy:... That's not Scary.

Cartman: So he lives on this Mountain, and weaves baskets and other assorted Crafts, They say that on quiet nights, You can hear him weaving his Baskets, Kik, Kik, Kik.

Wendy: Weaving Baskets have no sound.

Stan: You suck at telling Scary stories Cartman.

Dipper: Where exactly does it make its home?

The kids looked at Dipper.

Kyle: Oh god you don't actually believe it do you?

Dipper: It could be real you never know!

Before anyone could say anymore, a Tremor filled the Earth.

Dipper: What was that?

Stan: Maybe it's Scuzzlebutt coming to Weave us into baskets

Kyle: Wow, I hope he doesn't get us with his Celery hand.

The kids laughed.

Cartman: Go to hell you guys!

Jimbo than strummed a tune on his Jango.

Jimbo: Hey Ned, Why don't you whip out the old cancer Kazoo, let's do a little song.

Ned: _**Abumbayah my lord, kumbayah.**_

_**Uumbayah my lord, kumbayah.**_

_**Uumbayah my lord, kumbayah.**_

Jimbo started to cry as he heard it.

_**Mmmoh lord, Kumbayah.**_

_**Emsomeone's crying my lord, Kumbayah**_

_**Someone's crying my lord, Kumbayah...**_

Nearby, Cartman had slipped off and began creating a disguise.

Cartman: So, All of them but Dipper don't think scuzzlebutt is real huh? Lets see how they like when they actually see a Scuzzlebutt.

Ned: _**Someones crying,**_

_**My lord, Kumbayah.**_

**The next morning.**

Dipper and Mabel slept their tent, When Wendy came in.

Wendy: Dipper, Mabel, Wake up.

Dipper: Huh, Er wha?

Wendy: I don't know where Cartman is, I think someone took him away.

Dipper: Where are the others?

Wendy: Stan and Kyle are still Around, And Jimbo and Ned went fishing with Kenny.

Dipper and Mabel came out of the Tent, And were met by a miserable looking Stan.

Mabel: Hey Stan, What's the matter?

Stan: I thought this was supposed to be my camping trip, Why does my Uncle Like Kenny so much? Doesn't he like me anymore?

Wendy: Stan, Get over it, No one cares.

Stan: I care! This is Family were talking about!

Wendy: Yeah well, Your Uncles Crazy.

Stan: Oh please, Your Uncles a two bit Con artist with the same name as me.

Wendy: That's their Uncle!

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo: Wow, What a beautiful day for fishing.

Jimbo Kenny and Ned were on a boat with a Rocket attached.

Jimbo: Look Ned, There's fish right there!

Jimbo threw a grenade down into the Water, Sending the fish flying into the boat, Dead.

Ned: Hmm, Got it.

Kenny threw a grenade at a school of Fishes, And blew them out of the water.

Jimbo: Wow, Great Instincts boy.

On the mainland not far away Stan called out.

Stan: Uncle Jimbo! Cartman's Missing.

Jimbo: Who? The Fat Kid?

Stan: Yeah?

Jimbo: Aw Hell, We better go look for him, Gotta cut it short Ned, Fire up the Twelve twenty.

Ned pulled a string Attached to the Rocket, It blasted into the Ocean, Killing all the Fish instantly and shooting the boat up in a Geyser, Which disappeared and landed them back to the Surface.

Jimbo: Well, I think that's about the Limit for our Fishing Permit.

Ned: Hmm, And It smells like dead fish here.

Kenny: (A little like a BEEP!)

Ned: Hmm, That's nasty.

Jimbo: Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen a kid as cool as you Kenny, I'm making you, Mu honorary nephew.

On the Shore, Stan overheard this, And his Heart sank, Wendy, Dipper and Mabel were not to Far away, Wendy went over to Stan, Leaving Dipper and Mabel Alone.

Dipper: Hey Mabel, Do you the Scuzzlebutt might have something to do with Cartman's disappearance?

Mabel: Are you still on that? Come on Dipper, It's just a story.

Dipper: Like everything back in Gravity falls?

Mabel: … What are you saying?

Dipper: Nothing much? Just maybe you know, We do a little hunting of our own.

Mabel: Like old times?

Dipper: Like old times!

The Twins Brofisted.

**Meanwhile.**

Mayor McDaniels: Alright are the Teams Rostered?

Valery: Yes Mayor, There awaiting the order to move out.

Badger: And several of the Townsfolk have been rostered to help as well.

Mayor McDaniels: Good, We need to get up there now!

Chef: Come on Everybody! We have to save the Children!

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo, Ned, Wendy, Kenny, Stan and Kyle followed Cartman's tracks to where he was last sean.

Jimbo: Well he couldn't have gone far, Unless something drove him off.

Ned: Hmm, There's not many animals out today Jimbo.

Jimbo: Yeah, It's like something funny's going on.

Another Rumble from the Mountain was felt.

Wendy: More Rumbling? I think there's some Vol- Hey where are Dipper and Mabel?

They all looked around, but the couldn't see either of them.

Jimbo: Great now we have three missing Kids! Hey Look a Ram!

A ram came into view.

Jimbo: IT's COMING RIGHT FOR US!

Before Jimbo Could Fire, Kenny fired has Gun straight at the Ram, Killing it on the Spot.

Jimbo: nice shooting Kenny.

He then took Stan's gun.

Jimbo: Here, You need a bigger Gun.

Kyle: OH MY GOD LOOK!

On a High Ridge, Stood a brown Creature looming down on them, It was just Cartman in a Brown sheet, and Waving a twig and a Piece of Celery.

Cartman: I am ScuzzleButt! Lord of the Mountains! Behold My Patrick duffy leg!

Suddenly Dipper and Mabel Popped up beside it.

Mabel: OH MY GOD IT'S REAL!

Dipper: Mabel Get the Camera!

Kyle: Oh My god! Scuzzlebutt! Cartman wasn't lying!

Wendy: And it's got Dipper and Mabel!

Jimbo: Don't worry, I'll distract them, You get your Cousins.

Wendy nodded and Scurried up the Hill, Careful not to let Cartman see her.

Dipper: Where's your Patrick duffy leg?

Mabel: Does it like Glitter?

Wendy: Pst you guys! Over here!

The twins looked over to see Wendy hiding in the Nearby Bush.

Mabel: Wendy?

Wendy: Get over here! Your in the way!

Dipper: Of what?

Down below, jimbo had strapped on a Rocket launcher pack and aimed it at Cartman.

Jimbo: FIre in the Hole!

Jimbo launched the Rockets, Which zoomed towards Cartman.

Cartman: Holy Crap!

Cartman, Dipper and Mabel Jumped out of the way just in time!

Jimbo: Damn, I think I missed.

Cartman: Hey! What the Hell is wrong with you people?!

Jimbo: C'mon! Let's move, Move, Move!

The Kids hurried up the Mountain right after Cartman, Who ran right up it.

**Meanwhile.**

Mayor McDaniels: Okay people, Split up into teams and search the Mountain, Report back anything you find.

Valery: Oh god Harold! Our poor Daughter.

Harold: There there, We'll find them.

Badger: And there's this Blasted Volcano to deal with too.

Randy: I might have a solution to that.

Mayor McDaniels: What?

Randy showed them a chart.

Randy: Well, If we could dig a very large trench, we could divert the Lava into a canyon, And it would bypass the town Completely.

Harold: And Just where would it lead?

Randy: I don't know.

Badger: Do we even have the time and Manpower? We already have people looking for the Kids.

Mayor Mcdaniels: Do we have any leftovers?

Badger: Well, Yes.

Mayor McDaniels: Then set them to dig the Trench.

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo: These look like his Tracks, He must have gone this way, Ned Prepare some HK12 and Plasticy.

Ned headed off.

Jimbo: I'll bet he's head someplace up above us, The higher up it goes, The Better it can breath.

Kyle: Look up there!

Cartman could be sene climbing his way up to a cave in the Mountain.

Cartman: You guys! It's just me!

None of them heard him.

Jimbo: Are we sure it's Scuzzlebutt?

Dipper: It looked like him to me.

Mabel: And Me!

Wendy: Does it have Patrick duffy for a leg?

Jimbo: i can't tell lets kill it!

Mabel: What? NO!

Cartman: I gotta get out of this stupid Costume.

Jimbo: Kenny you take the front.

Stan suddenly yanked the Gun out of Kenny's arms.

Stan: No, I'll do it Uncle Jimbo, I wanna bag that Animal!

Jimbo: That's the spirit! Let's hunt!

They all charged up the Mountain after Cartman, Who fled further up the Mountain.

Cartman: You guys! You Guys! I'm just kidding!

**Meanwhile**

Work on the trench began in earnest, While they did, Others looked for the Missing kids, And were taught… "Safety precautions."

Officer Barbrady: Okay people listen up, As we near the top of the mountain the chances or our encountering some lava become great, Therefore, Sergeant Yates has instructed me to show you this Training video to assist us, In Volcano safety, Mr Garrison, Rabbit if you would please.

Mr Garrison and a Stuffed yellow Rabbit turned on a Film Projector and lit up the Screen next to Barbrady.

_Host: Harborings of Sorrow Natural disasters can be the cause of troubling and Undesirable stress, And a Volcano is no exception, But what should you do if a Volcano erupts near you or Your family? Here we see the Stevens family enjoying a may picnic, But suddenly Daughter hears a noise. It's a Volcano. Junior seems worried, But have no fear junior, Jane learned in school what to do when you hear a volcano erupt, That's right Jane, Duck and Cover, So what will you do when you hear a volcano erupt? That's right, Duck and Cover. Thank you and Good night._

Officer Barbrady: Okay any questions.

Katara: That has got to be the most rediculus load of Fuck I have ever sean!

Officer Barbrady: That's enough out of you!

Sokka: Where are Mark, Mac and Aang in all this?!

**Meanwhile.**

Mac: This is Bullshit! Just because I'm black, and I carry a lot of Guns, And My Last name is Gunsling! I'm suddenly a Dangerous Criminal? Well, I'm not! So get me out of here.

Mark: what did you evan do to end up here?

Aang; Yeah how?

Mac: Nothing!

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo, Ned and the Kids hurried up the Mountain and found Cartman catching his breath from above.

Stan: I'm gonna bag Scuzzlebutt and then we'll see who's a little bastard!

Stan aimed the Gun.

Cartman: Hey! You guys! Seriously! It's just me!

Kyle: Do it Stan Kill it!

Mabel: No! Don't!

Dipper: Stan you can't!

Wendy: Stan this isn't you!

Stan withdrew his Gun.

Stan: Damn it I can't do it!

Jimbo: You pansy! Give me that Gun!

Dipper: No! This is History in the Making!

Mabel: Do not harm the Paranormal!

Cartman removed his Sack and dropped the objects in his hands.

Cartman: Hey!

Dipper: Cartman?

Mabel: Huh?

Cartman: God Damn it don't shoot me!

Jimbo: What the Sam hill?

Cartman: I was just trying to scare you guys! You can put the Gun down now.

Dipper: So… this was all a Trick?

Cartman: Yes!

Mabel: Aw… I was hoping for nostalgia with my Brother… And also a distraction from all the trauma of watching animals get shot.

Jimbo: Huh?

All of a Sudden the top of the Mountain blew up in Lava!

Ned: Hmm, Holy Crap!

Jimbo: The Mountain! It's blown its top!

The Volcano spewed Lava Everywhere, And shot a Flaming Builder out, Which seemed to land right on Kenny.

Kyle: Oh my God! They killed Kenny!

Kenny stepped out from behind the Boulder.

Wendy: No they didn't.

Kenny waved but his Sleeve caught fire and the Boulder rolled on top of him.

Kyle: you bastards!

**Meanwhile.**

Jack: Look out the Volcano!

Man: Quick Duck and Cover.

Three men did so and were incinerated by the Lava.

Jack: idiots… Everyone else Run!

**Meanwhile.**

Jimbo, Ned and the Kids Ran screaming for their lives, But the Lava was coming right for them!

Jimbo: The Lavas coming right for us!

That's what I said…

**Down below.**

The ones working the Trench heard the Eruption and clear out just in time!

Badger: Rat! Mole! Is that everyone.

Rat: I think so Badger!

Toad: Look!

Jimbo, Ned and the Kids came into view.

Dib: It's Dipper!

Butters: Oh Hamburgers!

Chef: look!

Jimbo, Ned and the Kids ran to the Trench And Stopped.

Jimbo: What the Heck is this Trench doing here? We can't get across!

Randy: Uh-Oh.

Cartman: Help!

The Lava began to rush closer.

Suddenly, A large beast appeared from nowhere, It had Celery for a hand and Patrick duffy for a Leg!

Mabel: Oh my god!

Dipper: It's the real Scuzzlebutt!

Cartman: What?! Scuzzlebutt is real?

Jimbo: Quick Ned shoot it!

Ned tried to Fire his Gun, But Nothing came out.

Ned: Hmm, Oh no, Out of Amo!

Mayor McDaniels: What… Is that thing?!

Chef: That's… ScuzzleButt!

Randy: I faced him as a Kid, He weaves Baskets and has Patrick duffy for a leg!

Mr Garrison: Wait… So he's Harmless?

Badger: How can this get any Crazier?

Jimbo: Well Kids, I'm sorry I got you all Killed.

Wendy: You think!?

ScuzzleButt suddenly grabbed a tree and ripped it in half then removed all the leaves and weaved into… A Basket.

Dipper: Whoa, That was wicker Basket.

Mabel: Wow, He's saving us!

ScuzzleButt looped a Strong Branch into the Basket and Jimbo, Ned and the Kids climbed in, He than hoisted them over the Trench and onto to safe Ground, Those on the other side cheered.

Vana; Oh my God! ScuzzleButt Saved the day!

Randy: And my Calculations were Correct, the Lava is following the Trench into the Canyon!

And It did.

Harold: Uh, Randy? Where does the Canyon lead?

Randy: Uh…

**Meanwhile.**

Well, It's a bad day for Denvor.

**Meanwhile.**

Badger: You gotta be kidding me.

Toad: Oh well, Crossover town is saved!

As the town Cheered, Kenny appeared over a hill.

Stan: Hey look Kenny's okay!

Mayor McDaniels: Well, We owe everything to this wonderful, Yet misunderstood Creature, Thank you Scuzzlebutt.

Dipper: Mr Scuzzlebutt Can I-

Suddenly Stan Shot Scuzzlebutt through the head.

Stan: I did it, I did it, I finally killed something!

Dipper: NO!

Wendy: Stan!

Jimbo: Damn it Stan you shouldn't have done that!

Stan: What?

Jimbo: Listen, There's somethings you kill and somethings you don't!

Stan: Uh… No.

Ned: Hmm, Only now in this late hour do I realize the Folly of Guns, I'll never use a gun again.

Ned than Dropped his Gun and It fired at Kenny Who flew back into the trees, With Several Rats following.

Stan: But I just wanted you to be proud of me, Like you were with Kenny!

Jimbo: But Kenny's dead now Stan, And your always gonna be my nephew, You just can't kill anything, You understand.

Wendy: Do you understand the Difference between Hunting and Camping?

Jimbo: What do you mean?

Wendy: When I agreed to come on this trip, I was under the impression that NOTHING WOULD DIE!

Jimbo: Oh…

Mabel: I have seen blood… Far too much…

Dipper: So long… So long without Paranormal crap and You Ruin it Stan!

Stan: Sorry.

Wendy: God only knows what the Rest of Your Family is like Stan.

From afar, Randy Marsh stared at DIpper and Mabel, with wide eyes.

Randy: So it's true…

**To be continued…**

**Stay tuned next time folks!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Episode 25.**

**Clone Terror.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, While Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman look on blankly at the bus stop.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

The Next day after the Scuzzlebutt incident, Dipper, mabel, Kyle, Stan, Cartman and Kenny were at the Bus stop again, There was something different about Stan.

Cartman: Hey Stan, Where'd you get that black eye?

Stan was Startled.

Stan: No one, I mean, Nothing.

Dipper: Is something wrong Stan.

Mabel: Did your sister beat you up again Stan?

Stna: No!

Dipper: Why? Because of ScuzzleButt?

Stan: She's pissed off, Because she got headgear at the Dentist, She's taking it out on me!

Kyle: Wow, Kinda sucks how you let her beat you up like that Stan.

Cartman: I would never let a woman kick my Ass, If she tried anything, I would say HEY You get your bitch ass back in the kitchen you and make me some pot pie!

Dipper: Have you told your Parents?

Stan: They don't believe me, They think she's all innocent and sweet, But I know she's a pissed off Bitch!

Dipper: Dude, You shouldn't let her treat you like that! No one should treat you like that!

Cartman: Dude you have never met Stan's sister she's… Hey Kyle, What's with the Elephant.

Kyle: You mean this one?

An Elephant was right next to Kyle, Tied on a leash.

Kyle: Oh yeah, He's my new pet Elephant.

Mabel: WOW! A pet Elephant?! Anything can be Pets!

Kyle: Yeah, But my Mom can't let me keep him in the House, She says he's too big.

Mabel: In hindsight you should have just got a pig instead.

Cartman: I got a pig too.

Kyle: Wel pigs aren't smart like Elephants.

Mabel: Oh Posh! Waddles is plenty smart!

Just than the Bus pulled up.

Mrs Crabtree: Hey! What is that thing!

Kyle: Uh this? This is… the new Retarded kid.

Mrs Crabtree: Oh, I'm sorry little Girl, But you still can't get on, You have to take the special ed bus.

**Later.**

Mr Garrison: And now Children, Our friend Mr Hat is going to tell us all about genetic engineering.

Mr Hat: That's right Mr Garrison, Genetic engineering is an exciting new science, You can splice the DNA from some animals and make them better.

Kyle raised his Hand.

Mr Garrison: Yes Kyle?

Kyle: With genetic engineering could you make an Elephant smaller?

Mr Garrison: Well, Uh… I suppose it could be done, Maybe with a dog, Or a Cat, Or… A pig.

Kyle: That's it! I'm going splice my Elephant with a Pot Belly Pig and Make Pot Belly Elephants!

The class all gasped out.

Kyle: They'd be smart like Elephants, But Small like Pigs.

Bebe: Wow, I'd want a pot belly Elephant!

Pip: I'll pay ten dollars for one!

Craig: I'll pay fifty!

Terrance: That's stupid!

Kyle: Shut up Terrance! We can genetifo anything we want!

Derick: 25 bucks says you can't!

Terrance: Yeah, I could clone a whole Human being before you can slice and Elephant and a Pig.

Mr Garrison: Well isn't this exciting, Two A plus students in a cloning war.

Mr Hat: Yeah Mr Garrison, Genetic Engineering lets us correct gods Horrible Mistakes, Like German people.

Mr Garrison: Well, You both might wanna visit the Genetics Ranch outside of Town for some help, And you could both use this for your Science Fair Projects next month.

Just than, The Bell rang and school was over, The kids got out of their seats and packed up for home.

Kyle: Genetic engineering Ranch? Sweet.

Dipper: But we still need a pig.

Kyle: We could use Cartman's or Mabel's pigs.

Cartman: What?!

Mabel: You leave Waddles out of this!

Kenny: (Relax, We're not gonna hurt them, We just need one of them to give up some blood.)

Cartman: Okay take Mabel's pig.

Mabel: No take Cartman's Pig!

The two Argued until they got to the Bus Stop, and Went home.

Mabel: You wouldn't let them take Waddles would you?!

Dipper: Of course not, We'll use Cartman's Pig.

Mabel: Good.

The twins were silent for a moment.

Dipper: Mabel, can I ask you something?

Mabel: Yeah.

Dipper: Were you… Fine?

Mabel: Huh?

Dipper: Were you Really Really fine… Without me?

Mabel: What are you talking about?

Dipper: I mean…

Dipper sighed.

Dipper: I said whatever came our way, We'd face it together, Remember? And we… We didn't.

Dipper shed a few tears.

Dipper: I left you alone… Went on my own thing… Uh… Left you alone…

Mabel: I had Our Aunt, Uncle and Wendy.

Dipper: It probably broke your heart…

Mabel: Dipper…

Dipper: And if it did your Probably hiding a lot of Resentment.

Mabel: Dipper.

Dipper: And If you do… I want you to know… I'm Sorry!

Dipper broke down.

Dipper: With all my heart!

Mabel: DIPPER! It's okay.

Dipper: Wha?

Mabel: I understand- Okay first off.

Mabel slapped Dipper across the face.

Mabel: Suck it up you Pussy! And Second, I get it, I'm not pretending everything didn't happen… Mom, Dad, Our Town, The Rats… I still remember it… It wasn't your decision to separate us, And To be honest, Yes I was a little hurt at first, But I got over it quickly, And I had like I said before, I had Uncle Harold, Aunt Valory and Wendy with me and Waddles too, So yeah, I was okay with not being near you, You don't have to apologize Dipper.

Dipper stared at her sister.

Dipper: Wow… You've really grown up Mabel.

Mabel: Yep, Grown up Mabel That's me! Boop.

Dipper laughed as Mabel poked his nose.

Dipper: Come here.

The twins shared a good long hug with each other.

**The next morning.**

Dipper and Mabel woke up the next morning and left the house, Where they were met By Kyle, Kenny, Cartman, Who had brought his Pig and a battered and Bruised Stan.

Kyle: Ready to go you guys?

Dipper: Go where?

Kyle: To the Genetics ranch, I got Mabel's text about how she didn't want Waddles to be Splice so instead We got Cartman's pig so we can splice it's genes with my Elephant.

Cartman: Nobody's splicing nothing from Fluffy!

Dipper: Geez Stan, What happened to you?

Stan: What do you think?

Dipper: Your Sister?

Stan: Yeah…

Dipper Frowned.

Dipper: Why is your sister so mean to you?

**Later.**

It had reached night time by the time they got to the Ranch, It was a Big building on the top of a Spooky hill where a large black metal fence stood keeping anyone else out, With a sign saying Keep out.

The six Kids approached the gate, With Kyle's Elephant.

Dipper: This must be it.

Cartman: Well, Looks like nobody's home, Guess we should come back some other time.

Kyle: No Cartman, We're going in there and splicing Fluffy and my Elephant together.

Cartman petted his Pig.

Cartman: Don't worry Fluffy, I won't let them hurt you.

Kyle: It's just a stupid Pig.

Stan: Yeah quit being such a baby.

Cartman: Baby? Well at least I don't get my ass kicked by a girl!

Stan: At least I don't get wet my bed.

Cartman: Ey! You don't know anything!

Kyle: What would you know? You only get higher than a D!

Cartman: Ey! You shut your mouth and Go back to san francisco with all the other Jews!

Kyle: There's no Jews in San Francisco!

?: Can I help you!

A large man appeared from nowhere, He was an Elderly man, Who wore a Yellow Hawian shirt with and Flowers and an Open Collar that showed chest hair, Yellow Trousers, and white bandana and brown hat on his head.

His Appearance sacred the kids, And made Kenny zip up his Parka.

Dipper: Uh… Hello sir, Uh we were just wanted to Crossbreed and Elephant and a Pig.

Dr mephesto: Oh what a brilliant Idea, Huge elephant sized pigs!

Kyle: Uh no we were thinking more of little pot bellied Elephants that people can keep in their houses as pets.

Dr Mephesto: Oh that's an even better idea, Come on in.

Mephesto led them inside his lab, Where several animals were kept, In cages and other containment devices, Mephesto led them through his lab.

Dr Mephesto: I'm so glad you kids decided to take an interest in genetic engineering.

Cartman: It's okay Fluffy, Nobodys gonna hurt you.

Dr Mephesto: It's thanks to genetic engineering that the world will soon be rid of Hunger, disease Pollution and evan the War itself, Provided the forces of evil don't get their hands on it, Here I have created things that will change the world for the better, for instance, Here is a monkey with four asses.

Four assed Monkey: Hmm…

Dipper: What?

Dr mephesto: And here of course is my four assed Ostrich, and my four assed Mongoose.

Mabel: Do you have anything besides Animals with Four asses.

Dr Mephesto: Oh well, I suppose so, uh Ah yes, Over here.

Dr Mephesto led the kids to another part of the lab.

Dr Mephesto: Here I have Rats spliced with Ducks and Gorillas spliced with Mosquitos and here, I have Fish spliced with Rabbits to make Bunny fish.

Cartman looked in the tank.

Cartman: Hey, these bunny ears are just tied on with little strings.

Dr Mephesto: And here, is Swiss cheese splice with Chalk and a beard.

Dipper: Those aren't evan mixed together.

Kyle: And what about our pot bellied Elephant?

Dr Mephesto: Well, I'm sorry kids, But Pig and Elephant DNA just won't splice, Haven't you ever heard that song by lover boy?

Dipper: What song?

Dr Mephesto: _**Dangit Doit! **_

_**Pig and Elephant DNA!**_

_**Just won't splice!**_

Dr Mephesto: Al though maybe I could help add a few asses to that swine of yours.

Cartman: You can keep your hands off of Fluffy's Ass!

Mephesto picked a Needle off of his table.

Dr Mephesto: You know it's amazing what we can do with a little blood sample these days.

Stan: What are you- OW!

Mephesto pricked Stan arma dn scuked Blood.

Kyle: Hey! What was that for?!

Dr Mephesto: Oh Pardon me I Cripped, Could I have some hair please?

Dipper: Oh, No, I think we'll be going now.

And with that the kids left.

**The next morning.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny were standing in line for lunch, With them was Pip, The kid who Cartman Farted fire on, He was a Weird kid, With a Pentagon like head, Blond hair under a victorian century cap, Almost Vicotian style dress coat, A big brown bow tie, Sky blue shorts with Purple socks and a Maron double collar.

Cartman: Man, I sure am Hungry.

Pip: Any idea what's for lunch today?

Dipper: Pizza last I heard.

Cartman: Don't talk to him, Nobody likes him.

Stan: Yeah what kind of Name is Pip any way?

Pip: Well, My father's family name being Pirrup, And my Christian name Phillip, My infant tongue.

Cartman: God Damn it nobody gives a rats ass!

Just then, Derek and his gang came over.

Derek: Hey douches, You dumb asses give up on your stupid Science fair Progect yet?

Kyle: No, Were already half way done.

Derek: Half way? Than all you've got is a stupid pig!

Bill and Fosse laughed.

Bill: Yeah, Heh, Heh.

Fosse: Stupid gay pig!

Chandler: Bet you they Don't have a pig at all!

Mabel: Oh we have a pig, In fact I bet it's more than what you got!

Terrance: On the Contrary, We've already got our clone, Well under way. Fosse show it off.

Fosse undid the Black bag he was carrying and a Foot hopped out!

Pip: Oh goodness! They cloned a foot!

The foot hopped over to the Boys and Kicked Cartman's face.

Cartman: Ey! I'll kick you in the nuts!

And with that he kicked the foot away, Where it landed in Butters lunch tray and bounced off again.

Derek: By friday! We'll have cloned a whole human being! Good luck with your stupid little Pig.

And they walked off.

Mabel: God I hate that guy.

The kids moved up to Chef.

Chef: Hello Children.

Kids: Hey Chef.

Chef: How are you doing?

Stan: Bad.

Chef: Why bad?

Kyle: We need to genetically engineer an Elephant and Pig, But the genes won't splice.

Chef: Well of course they won't splice, Haven't you ever heard that song by lover boy? _**Dangit Doit!**_

_**Pig and Elephant DNA just won't splice!**_

Chef than thought for a moment.

Chef: hmm… A pig Elephant, Say now that's not a bad Idea.

Kyle: See I told you.

Chef: imagine, A pint Sized elephant, that you can keep in your house, Kids we could make a fortune with this.

Dipper: But how can we do it?

Chef: Forget about who Genetic Crap, If you want to combine a pig and an Elephant, You got to get them to make love.

Cartman: What?!

Dipper: I don't think an Elephant would make love to a pig.

Cartman: And my Pig! Would definitely not make love to Kyle's stupid Elephant!

Chef: Sure they would, But your gonna have to get them in the mood.

Mabel: How do we do that?

Chef: Do what I would, Get em good and drunk.

**Later.**

Stan: So uh… Any of you want to come over?

Kyle: No way Stan, We've got work to do.

Cartman: What's the matter Afraid your sister will kick your ass again?

Stan: Shut up Cartman.

Dipper: I'll come over.

Stan: Really?

Dipper: I guess.

Mabel: Well, Good luck with that, We've got to get Cartman's Pig, C'mon guys.

Mabel, Kyle and Kenny headed off.

Cartman: Hey! You leave Fluffy alone!

Cartman followed after them.

**Later.**

Dipper and Stan arrived at Stan's house, It was dark green house that was conveniently next to Kyle's house, Stan went in first he opened the door and looked inside, Than he motioned to Dipper to follow and they went inside together.

Stan: So uh, This my house, over their is the Kitchen and upstairs is.

?: Hey.

Stan stopped suddenly, His skin turning pale, Dipper felt chills up his spine, The two boys turned around and nearly pissed themselves in terror, At By far the most Horrifying thing Dipper had ever seen. (And He's sean horrifying!)

Stan's sister was dressed in a Grey coat and Pink pants, Her hair was messy Brown and shoulder length, Around her head was Orthodontic headgear, Which made her Scowling beard teeth even more terrifying!

Stan: Uh… Hi Shelly, This is my-

Shelly: Are you looking at my Headgear?

Stan: What?

Shelly: Are you looking at my Headgear?!

Dipper: He uh… Didn't notice.

Shelly: You little Liar!

Dipper: Listen you! You uh leave him-

Shelly just grabbed Dipper and threw him against the wall, Than she advanced on Stan, grabbed his collar and smashed him against the Wall, Then she threw him down the Basement, And when Stan Crawled back up Shelly Grabbed him by the head and Threw him at the Wall again, Dipper stared in Horror.

Dipper: Hey! Leave him alone!

Shelly saw Dipper getting back up.

Shelly: Or what Faggot?

Dipper: Uh… Or I'll…

Seeing no other option, Dipper just decided to just run up and punch Shelly… He dug his grave.

Dipper: Sorry?...

Shelly Kicked Dipper in the Balls, Kneed him in the face, Punched him to ground, Than proceeded to Pound his face against the Ground, Stan took this Opportunity to slink off to his room.

Shelly: I swear I'm gonna kill you Stan!

**Meanwhile.**

Dr Mephesto: Beautiful, It's absolutely Beautiful! My son, My Friends, I think we finally done it!

Derek smirked.

Terrance: Yes we have Dad, Our own Human clone.

Fosse: Who knew all we had to do was sneak a little DNA off of Stan? Heh Heh?

Bill: Yeah, Pretty gay.

Chander: If only we could have gotten his hair, Than it would be complete.

Derek: Meh, Well take what we'll get.

**Meanwhile.**

Kyle pumped the Keg into the Elephants mouth.

Kyle: C'mon Elephant keep drinking!

Stan: Damn, How drunk does he need to be to make love to the Pig?

Dipper: At least the Pig will be drunk.

Nearby, Cartman's Pig was drinking out of a pen with the word Beer in it.

Kyle: This is never gonna work at this rate.

Chef suddenly came over.

Chef: hello Children, I thought I'd come over and see How the Projects going.

Mabel: No good so far, We've gotten them drunk but they wont have Sex.

Chef: Oh children, You can't expect to make an Elephant and Pig Drunk and automatically make love, You too set the mood, Here let me show you what I mean.

Chef walked over to a Yellow Boombox with megaphone attached and turned it on.

Chef: _**Tonight is right for love.**_

_**You know I, Wanna touch you **_

_**Where the lights don't go.**_

_**Tonight is right for love.**_

_**Love gravy.**_

_**It's spacing love so sweet.**_

_**I wanna, Keep you burning like a dog in heat.**_

_**Tonight is right for love.**_

_**Love Gravy.**_

Chef: Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr Elton John,

Elton John: _**Ooh… Tonight.**_

_**Ooh… Is right.**_

_**Ooh… Tonight is right for love.**_

_**Lovin cradle.**_

Chef: Thank you Elton, _**Tonight is right for love.**_

_**Love Gravy…**_

Kyle: Hey look it's working!

The Elephant and the Pig got Close together.

Chef: Now Children, Gather round and watch the wonders of life, the Beauty of Mother nature.

And by Mother nature, Chef meant inappropriate noises and sights that Terrified the kids beyond belief, And caused Stan to Barf.

Kyle: AHH!

Dipper: Dear god!

Mabel: Sick!

Cartman: Fluffy!

Chef: Hmm, Now I know how all those white Women must have felt.

Dipper:... What?

**Meanwhile.**

Dr Mephesto: Oh… How lushious, Our creature has come to fruition, Boys.

Derek: Excellent, Just like my Mother paid you to.

Dr Mephesto: Oh my God, He only has one ass, he's of no use to use, I'll have to burn the room.

Chandler: I told you we should have gotten Stan's hair and who cares how many asses he has.

Suddenly, The Clone Broke out and observed it's new surroundings, It looked almost like Stan, But his head was Ugly and Big and his left arm was Extremely long.

Dr Mephesto: Oh no, This entire experiment is turning out very bad.

Clone Stan: Me bad?

Clone Stan picked up a Four assed frog and threw him across the room.

Dr Mephesto: Egad! He's out of control we have to destroy him!

Terrence: But he's our science fair Project.

Dr Mephesto: No son he's too dangerous.

Derek than opened the gate.

Derek: Oh please how bad could this freak be?

Dr Mephesto: Derek no!

But it was too late, Clone Stan ran across the room and Jumped out a window, Crashed through the gate and Ran off.

Dr Mephesto: Oh my Boy, You've made a horrible Mistake, You've put all of Crossover town in jeopardy!

Derek: There all stupid anyway, C'mon guys, After that Clone.

Fosse: Yeah, They're all gay!

And with that The boys ran after the Clone.

**The next morning.**

Cartman: Aren't they ever gonna wake up?

Chef: Oh they will, But it's not gonna be pretty.

Mabel: But you said Mother Nature was a wonderful thing.

Stan: Yeah, When did it go to Ugly?

Chef: Usually about 9:30 in the Morning.

Just than the Elephant and Pig woke up and stared at each other.

Chef: Uh Oh here we go.

The Elephant let out a terrified scream!

Chef: Oh there is nothing worse than getting all drunk and waking up in the morning next to a pig.

The Pig rubbed her forehead.

Chef: Or a big fat Elephant.

Kyle: How do we know if she's pregnant?

Chef: Well, we might not know that for a couple of days.

Mabel: Couple of days? But Derek is going to have completed his clone by tomorrow.

Suddenly Dr Mephesto appeared, Followed by his Assistant thing.

Dr Mephesto: Oh thank Buddha I found you kids, Have you seen anything odd lately?

Dipper: We made and Elephant and a pig have Sex.

Dr Mephesto: No! I mean odd!

Chef: Hey, Your that crazy cracker from that hill outside the Western woods, Dr Mephesto.

Dr Mephesto: Sir, If making Mutant Animals spliced with Animals is crazy, And uh… Er… Hm… Never mind, Anyway, There's been an incident at the Ranch, The Richards commissioned me to create a Clone of this Little boy and he's broken free.

Kenny: (A big mutant version of Stan?)

Dipper: So that's what you took Stan's blood for.

Dr Mephesto: I needed some hair to complete the Process, But because you wouldn't let me take your hair, I had to go on without it, It's made him Very Dangerous, You have to help me find him.

Stan: But where would he be?

**Meanwhile.**

People Ran and Screamed as Clone Stan destroyed cars and crashed through Buildings, Several cops and Freedom watchers tried to stop him, But he Managed to beat them, Quit painfully too, Mr Garrison came over as he Knocked out an Otter.

Mr Garrison: Stan? What happened to your head?

Clone Stan just Grabbed Garrison whacked him on the Ground threw him through a window at Jimbo's gun store, Sokka charged up from behind the Clone, But it swung it's arm and sent him Flying into an Upturned car.

Near another upturned Car, Mark, Mac, Jack and Vana took cover, Along with Sparx, A Lynx named Larry and a few other Freedom watchers.

Mark: What is that thing.

?: It's a demon!

Jack: I think I've seen that kid.

Mac suddenly jump up from out of the Car and Fired a Gatling gun at the Clone, But it Hid behind some debris.

Mac: We've got it Cornered!

Mark: All units Converge!

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny arrived on the scene.

Stan: Dear god! Look at this.

Kyle: How could you cause all this?

Suddenly several screams of Pain and bodies went flying, One landed Right in front of Dipper.

Dipper: Dib!?

Dib: Dipper… That thing is killing us!

Clone Stan came out, Carrying an Unconscious Aang in his long arm and Standing over a Beat up Katara.

Mabel: Oh My God!

News reporter: It appears that the Horrible destructive creature that has beaten the Avatar is a being resembling 9 year old, Stan Marsh of Crossover town, When asked why he was wreaking havoc on his home town, and how he had disfigured his Arm and Head, Stan's only reply was "Me Stan, Bachomp Ba Chewy chomp, Back to you in the studio.

News Anchor: Thanks Tom, Police and Freedom watch in the town are currently trying to handle this, But he has already beaten the avatar, Somehow. That's all for how.

**And Now back to Jesus and Pals.**

Jesus: Yey, The way is paved for gold for the who seek truth and-

Clone Stan: Bachomp BaChewie Chewy Chomp!

Jesus: Jesus Christ!

Kitty: You don't know that half of it… Ow.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper: Officer Barbrady! My Genetic Clone is Destroying the town and Beating up the Freedom watch, You gotta help us find him!

Officer Barbrady: We're doing all we can nothing to see HEEREE!

Suddenly, Clone Stan grabbed Barbrady and threw him into a lake!

Dipper: C'mon we gotta get him!

Suddenly Eric and Trevor pounced on Stan out of No where.

Eric: Got you know Asshole.

Trevor: Thought you could beat us up huh?

Stan Kicked the two boys off him.

Stan: hey get off!

Dipper: Lay off you guys it's not him!

Suddenly Jimbo appeared.

Jimbo: Stan, What the Hell has gotten into you? Why did you throw your Teacher into my gun shop?

Stan: I what?

Trevor: Hey what's that?

Clone Stan saw the three and Roared, Jimbo, Eric and Trevor than shot off like Jack rabbits.

Kenny: (That got his Attention.)

Mabel: What do we do?

Stan: STOP!

Clone Stan suddenly noticed Stan and did what he said.

Clone Stan: Gah, Baba Chan?

Kyle: Hey he recognizes you Stan.

Dipper: That's good, Stan talk to him more.

Stan: Dude, Just calm down.

Clone Stan sat on the Ground.

Cartman: Well, Now what do we do with him?

An Evil smile spread across Stan's face.

Stan: Stan? How would you like to go home and meet your Sister?

Clone Stan Smiled.

**Later.**

Dipper and the others Soon arrived at Stan's house and Managed to Get Clone Stan inside.

Stan: Okay now Stan Remember, Shelly is the Girl that looks like Mabel, But has a Rod over her mouth, When you see her, You kick her ass, Shelly bad, Shelly very bad.

Clone Stan: Me bad?

Stan: No, Shelly bad, You good.

Taking this as an insult, Clone Stan knocked over some shelves and threw around other furniture.

Kyle: Oh my god He's tearing up the House Stop him!

Kenny rushed forward and nearly engaged Clone Stan, But was sent flying into the Microwave, Which turned on when he entered it, At that Moment.

Shelly: What the Hell is going on?

She then saw Clone Stan.

Shelly: What the Hell are you?

Clone Stan: Chewie Chewie Chomp!

Clone Stan Swung at Shelly, Who ducked sent a lefthook in the Clones Stomach, Than a sidekick that sent crashing to the Ground, When it tried to Get back up only to be met with a Kick that knocked it out Cold, At that moment, Dr Mephesto came in.

Dr Mephesto: The Clone, Oh children, I am so sorry for everything.

Mabel: That's okay.

At that Moment Derek and his Posse entered.

Derek: Our Clone! Give it back!

Dr Mephesto: No Derek, This beast is a disgrace to genetic engineers everywhere, I know that now, I tried to play god and caused nothing but Trouble.

And with that He pulled out a gun and Shot Clone Stna through the head.

Terrance: Dad! No!

Derek: Our CLONE!

Dr Mephesto: All I ever wanted was to genetically engineer something useful, but I failed, Perhaps we shouldn't be toying with god's creations, Maybe we should just leave Nature alone it's simple one assed self.

Derek: We'll get you Bastards!

And with that, Derek and his friends left, Than Kenny came out of the Microwave, Burnt to a skeleton.

Stan: oh my God! They killed Kenny!

Kyle: You bastards!

Dr Mephesto: Now if some of you could help me bury this thing…

Kyle and Cartman help Mephesto remove Clone Stan's corpse, Leaving Dipper, Mabel, Stan and Shelly alone, Outside A car parked in the Garage.

Stan: Oh Crap my Parents are home!

Shelly: Would someone please tell me what the Hell is going on?!

Dipper: Well, Uh, Yes Funny story-

But Before Dipper could finish, Randy and a Woman, Presumably Stan's mom came in.

Randy: Stan! W-what in god's name is Happening?!

Sharon: Everyone in Town's bean sayin you have some… Evil Clone, What's going on?

Stan: Uh well…

Dipper: Listen, Mr and Mrs Marsh I swear, Whatever happened hear was beyond our control, And if we've caused any distress we'll be on our-

Before Dipper and Mabel could leave though, A wide eyed Randy slammed the door.

Mabel Hey!

Dipper: What the?

Randy looked down on the Kids as is he'd seen a ghost, So did Sharon.

Randy: Are you… Pines?

Dipper blinked.

Dipper: Yes…

Randy: Do you… Henry Pines.

The Twins were shocked.

Mabel: You… You know are Dad?

Randy: Knew him? Knew HIM!?

Radny than laughed with Joy and Yanked Dipper and Mabel into his Arms!

Randy: Son of a Bithc was my Best- FRIIIIIEEEENDDD!

Shelly:... Did he just sing that?

**The Next Morning.**

Mr Garrison: Now everyone, Let's give Kevin Stoely and his weed a big hand.

A kid in a red coat named Clyde was the only one who clapped.

Mr Garrison: Okay Kyle, Let's see your Project.

Kyle: That might have to wait, The pig hasn't given birth yet.

Mr Garrison: Okay then, Derek how about you show off your Project.

Derek cleared his throat.

Derek: Mr Garrison, Fellow "Students" With the Help my Friend Terrence Mephesto and our other Friends, Chandler Bill and Fosse have created a creature far superior to man, I present to you: The five assed Monkey!

Bill threw off the tarpaulin and revealed the Creation in a Glass box.

Mr Garrison: Oh my Isn't that beautiful Mr Hat.

The Class gave a light round of Applause.

Stan: Wait! Stop the Pig just gave Birth!

Stan and Cartman brought up the Cage.

Mabel: You mean it had a Baby?

The Class hurried up to the cage.

Dipper: Does it look like a pig or an Elephant?

The Baby emerged from the straw and it looked like…

Kyle: Hey it kinda looks like Mr Garrison.

Mr Garrison: Oh Jeez, Isn't that a coincidence? Regardless, You kids get first Prize!

Derek: WHAT?!

The kids clapped for joy.

Mabel: Dipper did you hear that? We won!

Dipper: Ha Ha yes!

Red: Give it up for the Pines twins!

And the class cheered, Except for Derek, Who just glared Hatefully.

**To be Continued.**

**Well, I hope you all enjoyed that folks, I have been wanting to get to this Episode for a while, and Have the Twins meet Randy Personally, Who plays a big part in Future installments, And I mean a big Part. ( And NO I don't Tegridy Farms, I mean the True Randy, The Geologist.) And believe me, The Next Episode will be tons of Crazy, And a little Scary, So Stay tuned.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Episode 26.**

**My Obi wan is Mustached Idiot.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, Than get scoop up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

Dipper, Mabel, Mark, Randy, Brian, Stewie and Wendy all screamed as the open Car they were in rattled down the Stairs. It flew off the first landing and It's occupants flew out of that in slow motion.

**Pause.**

Dipper: Hey, You stop to wonder, How the Fuck did I get here? God, The things that have happened since piedmont, First I find a Gem of ultimate power and the last of an extinct culture, Get chased and Attacked by Several Assholes, Nearly died keeping a useless machine from one of them, Found out my sister has been hanging out with Douchebags, One of whom is dating our Cousin, I end up on a Hunting trip turned Volcano chase with his Uncle and War buddy, Watched a Mutant clone of him destroy the town, And me, My Uncle, Sister and Cousin are in a car chase with his Dad, Being pursued by Anonymous Killers, How did it get like this? Well… Funny story.

**Flashback.**

It all started after the Science Fair Project last week, Dipper had settled into Crossover town pretty well, Despite the recent Shenanigans with Aliens, ScuzzleButt and Clone Stan, He managed to find life in Crossover town a good break, Barely saw the guys though, And spent much of his Time, With Mabel, Wendy and the Boys, Adn Brian and Stewie on a few occasions.

One night, The Twins along with Wendy, Their Uncle's Mark and Harold, And Aunt Valory had sat down to dinner, Jack had also bean invited.

Mark: So, How was school?

Wendy: Very good, I just got another A on my Math test.

Harold: Uh Huh.

Mabel: You guess wanna see a magic trick?

Mabel sucked up a Spaghetti String and nearly spit it out like a frog at Mark.

Mark: What… Was that?

Mabel: I was trying to be a Frog.

Dipper: You said it was a magic trick.

Mabel: Uh… It was a magic frog?

Valory: Don't play with your food Mabel.

Jack then got up.

Jack: Well, If anyone needs me, I'll be shedding fur in the guest bedroom.

He then went up stairs.

Dipper: That's where me and Mabel sleep.

Jack: I meant in Mark's.

Mark: What?! Oh no you don't.

Mark then hurried up the stairs.

Dipper: We have more than one guest bedroom?

Just then there was a knock at the door.

Wendy: I'll get it.

Wendy went to the door and found Stan there.

Stan: Wendy, Hi.

Wendy: Oh Hi Stan, What are you doing here?

Stan: Well I realized we haven't spent a lot of time lately so I thought I'd drop by and look you up.

Wendy: Look me up? Heh, Are you trying to sound generic?

Stan: Only for you babe.

Wendy Blushed.

Valory: Wendy, Who is it?

Wendy: It's just Stan mo-

Wendy then saw something behind Stan.

Stan: Wendy? What is it?

Behind Stan was… Uh… His dad dressed as in Fake glasses and an Otter suit… Who the Fuck wrote this bit? Not me.

Stan: Is something wrong-

Before Stan could answer, Wendy rushed to the door and Closed it before he could see.

Wendy: I uh… Didn't want the cold air getting in.

Stan blinked.

Wendy: So uh, Mom you wanna show Stan to the Kitchen?

Valory: Oh of course deer.

Valory got up and escorted Stan to the Kitchen.

Harold: Wendy, What's going on?

Wendy: Well… Uh… Dad, You know Stan?

Harold: Yes… You told me about him and I've seen him around and-

Wendy: His Dad's at the Door.

Harold: What?!

Valory: Uh?

Wendy: What should I do?

Harold: Don't let him in! Not with the Twins here!

Dipper: Don't let who in?

There was a knock at the door.

Stan: Who's that?

Harold: You're not being followed!

Stan: What?

Mabel: Who's at the door?

Wendy: No one Mabel, Just a telemarketer.

Randy: No I'm not.

Stan: What the?- Is that my Dad?

Harold: No it's not!

Mabel went to the door and opened it.

Harold: No don't!

But it was too late.

Stan: DAD?!

Randy: Hey Stan, Sorry for following you I wanted to meet you friends again.

Harold: Randy, Whatever you- Wait again?!

Harold looked at Dipper and Mabel.

Dipper: Yeah, We kinda… Met him a few days ago.

Mark then came down.

Mark: Who are you kids-?

Then he Saw Randy…

Mark: … FFFFFUUUUUUUU-!

**20 seconds later.**

Mark: FFFFFUUUUUUU-!

**Many seconds later.**

Mark: FFFFFUUUUUUUU-!

**So much seconds later that the joke got old and they just cut to the chase.**

Mark: … The Spawn… The Spawn…

Randy: Mark! Hey, Heard you were back.

Mark: Come no further Mother Fucker!

Randy: Oh come on, Are you still on about that "Incident" At the Zoo… Two years ago.

**Flashback.**

_Mark: AHHH! TIGER'S GOT ME! TIGER'S GOT ME!_

_Randy slowly backs away._

**Flashback.**

Mark: It was at the Circus.

Jack: Mark, I heard you say Fuck, What's going on down- OH GOD NO!

Randy: Oh hey Jack! You're here too!

Jack: you're not supposed to be here, Dumbass!

Randy: Good to see you too.

Jack just face palmed.

Jack: What the hell do you even want?

Randy: Well, I was just passing by-

Mark: No you weren't.

Randy: Saw my son go into this house.

Stan: He what?

Randy: Realized Dipper and Mabel were here, So I came over to invite them to My dad's birthday!

Harold: … What?

Dipper: Your… Dad's birthday?

Randy: Yeah, I figured you guys, Y'know, Would jump at the Prospect.

Mabel: OHMYGOD, I love Birthday Parties, Can we go Aunt Valory Please, Please Please, Please, Please, Please-

Valory just set Mabel aside.

Stan: So you stalked me here just to ask My new Friends to Grandpa's birthday party?

Randy: Well… Yeah, And Also I wasn't stalking you Stan, We had the same destination in mind.

Mark then took Randy by the Hand.

Mark: Excuse us.

Mark then took Randy away from Everyone else and Slammed him against the Wall.

Mark: Listen Marsh, If you get them involved in anything crazy, I WILL Break your Teeth!

Randy: Hey, I didn't know they were here to begin with, The Girl was probably here Longer, How could you hide her from me.

Mark: We kept her hidden from you because, We feared you'd end up using them as some kind of… Coping mechanism for Henry's loss.

Randy: Hey Fuck you! Henry would have Been Great with it! And So what if I do? Your sister would have gone along with it.

Mark: I thought you didn't like Lily.

Randy: … What? No No No! This is- I mean! C'mon what made you think that?

Mark: Hmm… Don't know really, Probably had something to do with that fact that she kicked your ass once.

**Flashback.**

**Flashback end.**

Randy: I was Desperate! Hey where's the flashback?

Mark: Hey yeah… Normally we'd… Wait what's that?... We can't show them yet… Oh… Okay.

They were silent for a moment.

Randy: Okay look, They already spent time with My Brother, How bad can hanging with my Dad be?

Mark raised an Eyebrow.

Randy: Rest assured, THere will be no Volcanoes!

Mark sighed.

Mark: Alright, Dipper and Mabel can go, But make sure nothing crazy happens, Like Another mutant clone of your Son, Or Talking Wax Statues, Or Come to life Video game Characters Or… Something.

Randy: Okay.

Randy soon came back into the Room.

Randy: C'mon kids, You're Uncle said you can come.

Mabel: Yippee!

Dipper: Uh Cool?

Valory: You kids have Fun!

Randy led Dipper and Mabel outside.

Randy: C'mon Stan, We don't wanna be late!

Stan: See you Wendy…

And with that Stan followed them Outside.

Jack: I have a bad feeling about this…

Mark: I know… Dipper and Mabel around that Clown, God only knows what will happen.

Valory: How is that bad? He's been their Dad's best friend since Childhood.

Mark: Yes, And that's what worries me, He could tell them things they might not be ready for… Mostly their Father.

**Meanwhile.**

Jargafar observed the image closely, His red eyes glowing softly on Marsh, on his Right, Cluny stood by as if he expected him to Fly out in rage, Which he didn't.

Lord Jargafar: So… Randy Marsh is involved? Hm, Delightful, I've always enjoyed that Imbeicile's stupidity, It makes me laugh, And possibly makes the Agent's job a lot more easier.

Cluny: What about the Freedom watch?

Lord Jargafar: They'll never know… I have my Reassurance.

Cluny: And our Agent?

Lord Jargafar: Our Operative will have them, Just as I wanted.

Cluny: But you said…

Lord jargafar: I changed my mind, I like staying in the shadows, a bit longer, It gives me a bit of Mystery…

Cluny: Or lack thereof…

Lord Jargafar: What was that?

Cluny: N-nothing My lord, Forgive me.

Lord Jargafar: You know what to do my Friend, When you find the right moment….

?: Consider it done.

**Meanwhile,**

If Either Dipper or Mabel thought this would like hanging out with Stan and Ford again… Yeah they were dead wrong.

Marvin Marsh was as old as them, but more worse for wear. He wore a Dark red sweater and brown Trousers He sat in a wheelchair, Had prominent Wrinkles and age spots and had only a few strands of grey hair left.

Marshes: Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Grandpa.

Marvin groaned.

Marshes: Happy Birthday to you!

Sharon placed a Big birthday cake in front of Marvin.

Marvin: Now blow out the Birthday Candles Grandpa.

Marvin took a breath and feebly blew out the candles, Not one went out.

Mabel: Uh… Yeah!

Randy: So dad, How does it feel to be a hundred and two?

Marvin: Shoot me!

Sharon: Okay, Make a wish Grandpa.

Marvin: I wish I was dead!

Randy: HaHa, That's our Silly Grandpa.

Marvin: I'm not being silly kill me! I'd do it myself but I'm too damn old!

Sharon: Uh… Oh who wants ice cream with their cake?

Mabel: I do!

Stan then looked at the Clock.

Stan: It's 8 O'clock! My favorite TV show is on! Terrance and Phillip.

Dipper: What's Terrance and Phillip?

Randy: Just some Canadain show Stan and his friends like to watch.

Shelly: That show is for babies it's so Stupid.

Stan: Mom, Can I go eat my cake on the couch?

Sharon: Alright, But take Grandpa with you.

Stan: Aw Okay.

Sharon than leaned in close,

Sharon: And make sure he stays with you, He's creeping out those kids.

Stan went over to the Couch, Followed by Marvin, Leaving the rest to eat cake.

Mabel: Hmm, Ice melting, A flavor more Flavorfulable than the Coating itself.

Randy: With 102 worth of Candle grease.

Dipper barely ate.

Dipper: So… Mr Marsh.

Randy: Names Randy.

Dipper: Okay Randy, When we last met you said you were our Dad's Best Friend.

Randy: Hell yeah! Practically since Childhood, Didn't I tell you this when we last met?

**Flashback.**

_Randy: Son of a Bithc was my best- FRIIIIIEEEENDDD!_

_Shelly: … Did he just sing that?_

_Randy then scooped Dipper and Mabel into a big hug, Nearly squeezing the life out of them._

_Randy: Oh my god, It's bean so, I have longed to meet you for god knows how many years, Henry's Probably told you all about me, Huh?_

_He finally Released Dipper and Mabel on that last note._

_Dipper: W-what? Who are you?_

_Randy: What, you don't remember? I haven't seen you since you were this small!_

_Mabel: You were there when we were born?_

_Randy took a deep Excited and Disturbingly Enthusiastic breath._

_Randy: I was there for more than that I was there when… That… And That…_

_Randy then went sprawling on the ground babbling incoherent words and rolling around._

_Sharon: You kids should come back another time, When he's not mad with joy._

_The twins didn't need to telling twice and got out of there._

**Flashback end.**

Dipper: I still barely remember you.

Randy: Oh come on… Surely you can remember one thing about me.

Mabel thought for a moment.

Mabel: Hey yeah… I think I do.

Randy held his breath.

Mabel: Your that deranged Dumby dumb Mom used to call Stinko face!

(Note: I wanted something inappropriate for Randy to be called, But that would have been unsuitable for Children.)

Randy kept a seemingly normal twitching face at this.

Randy: Excuse me.

He then got up and went upstairs, Sounds of Swearing and Objects breaking could be heard.

Sharon: She actually called him that?

Mabel: Yeah, I think she sometimes called him something a little more… Inappropriate.

Then Randy came back down, Seemingly calmer now.

Randy: Stinko Face, Lovely name.

A gunshot suddenly followed.

Marvin: God Damn it!

**Meanwhile,**

A black car pulled up in the forest opening outside of Crossover town, The driver emerged from the car followed by four other figures, They stopped at the forest's edge, The leader pulled out binoculars and observed the town, The leader turned to two of the others.

?: Go scout ahead and report back any sightings of the twins.

The three smaller minions scurried off.

**Meanwhile,**

At Kyle's house, He and Ike were watching the same Program as Stan.

_Phillip: Say Terrance, Now that you farted, I think I might fart too._

_(Farts.)_

_Terrance: Ha Ha Ha Ha! You farted!_

Kyle and Ike burst out laughing, While they did, Their mother Sheila came over.

Sheila: Kyle, Ike what are you boys laughing at?

She then looked at the Screen.

_Terrance: Hey Phillip, Would you like a flower?_

_Phillip: I sure would Terrance._

_Terrance: Alrighty then, Here's a tulip._

_(Farts.)_

_Terrance and Phillip: Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha._

Shelia: What is this? It's horrible?

Kyle laughed as he fell out of his seat, But quickly got back up.

Kyle: Dude, It's terrance and Phillip

_Phillip: (Punches Terrance.) Take that you stupid Dick!_

Shelia: What did he Say?

_Terrance: (Shoves Phillip.) Your an asshole Phillip._

_Terrance and Phillip laughed._

Shelia: What What What?!

Shelia then turned off the TV.

Sheila: Boys you are not to watch that show any more, It's nothing but toilet humor.

Kyle: But mom, Everyone watches Terrance and Phillip.

Sheila: Evan the Pines twins?

Kyle: No I don't think so, Wait why are-

Shelia: Uh, Nothing.

**Meanwhile, The next day.**

Randy had taken Dipper and Mabel out to the Northern outskirts of town, They stood on a hill with Mabel flying a kite.

Randy: Ah the great outdoors, Or at least a breath of it… This land bears much history you know… So many tales, So many fascinating Areas.

Mabel: Uncle Harold took me out there a few times.

Randy looked to where Mabel was pointing.

Randy: Oh yeah, The East grove… One of the Seven woodland locations of the Land once known as South park.

Dipper: There are more forests?

Randy: Plenty of them, For example, Out to the west lies the western wood, On to the Right of it… The Hundred Acre wood… Where fascinating creatures dwell, A donkey named Eyore is always a friend… And Kanga, And Little Roo, There's Rabbit and Piglet and there's Owl… But most of All Winnie the Pooh… Who I may have a… Complicated history with Lately…

**Flashback.**

_Randy: Give me back my Honey Asshole!_

_Pooh: I didn't even take it!_

_Randy shook the Gun at Pooh more._

_Randy: Lies All of it!_

_Piglet then came in with a jar of Honey._

_Piglet: Hey Pooh, You know that Honey we "borrowed"..._

_Pooh: Piglet! Run! He's onto us!_

_Piglet: Oh D-d-d-Dear!_

**Flashback end.**

Randy: We worked it out in the end.

Dipper looked to the woods in front.

Dipper: What are those?

Mabel: Huh, Uncle Mark never mentioned them to me.

Randy saw what they were referring to.

Randy: That? That's just Shadow Hollow, The Northern woods, Crossies don't go there much.

Dipper: Why? Are there… Nice people there?

Randy thought for a moment

Randy: Well… the Squirrels… Rabbits… Moles… Hedgehogs… Shrews… Some of them… Of course Shrews are a prickly bunch, And there's old Angus Badger too, Lives right at the heart of it, Wouldn't live anywhere else if you paid him to, And that's a good thing, Without him or any other Badger Who else can keep the "Undesirables" in check.

Dipper: Undesirables? You mean like… Foxes?

Randy: Uh… Sometimes…Not all of them, You know Just most of them… Also Rats… Weasels, Stoats and Ferrets… Hyenas, There alright in a way, But you can't really trust them.

Mabel: And… what's beyond that?

Randy: Haven't got a clue, Some place called… Snackafa or… Something.

Randy then sighed dreamily and Put his Arm around Dipper.

Randy: But what does that matter huh? Days like it just feels right… Hanging out together… Two kids and their Dads best Friend… All on saturday.

Dipper shoved Randy's arm off him.

Dipper: Okay, Seriously Our Dad never mentioned you.

Randy was taken aback.

Dipper: For the Past Unknown amount of days you've been making us Hang out with you and so far have just said your dad's best friend… I kind of No Idea where I'm going with this. The guys writing me are probably on writer's block or- Something.

Mabel: I think the guy had no idea where he was going, So he just wanted to get to some reveal that- Wait what am I talking about?

Dipper: Seriously he barely has any time for this- Wait now what am I talking about.

They sat in silence for a moment, then Randy spoke up.

Randy: So uh… What were you saying? About not believing I was your Dad's Friend?

Dipper: What? Oh yeah, If our Dad had told us about you he would have, Like when we were like… Five! (Although if Dad kept secrets that's something we're used to by now.)

Randy: He… Didn't tell you anything?

Dipper: No.

Randy: Not even about me?

Dipper: No.

Randy looked almost hurt, He nearly cried but stopped and looked around and back to the Kids.

Randy: Not even that… He was born here?

Dipper: Never on- Wait what?

Mabel: I thought only Mom was born here.

Randy: Pft, Well she was duh, But so was your Dad.

Dipper: Dad was born here?

Randy: And fought in the First phase of the HVDVND war.

Dipper and Mabel: What?!

**Meanwhile,**

The three figures returned to the Boss.

?: They are heading home with Randy Marsh.

?: Well then, We might as well follow them, Shall we?

**Meanwhile, At the Marsh house. (Again)**

Dipper: N-no No… Our Dad never fought in the First Phase, He was an Accountant.

Randy: Is that what he told you?

Dipper: It was his Job.

Randy: Yeah, And I've always been a geologist.

Dipper: You fought in the War too?

Randy: Pretty much, Yeah, Mostly with the Freedom watch-

Mabel: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, You were in the Watch during that time.

Randy: Yeah totally.

Mabel: Were you in many Battles?

Randy: Several I think, Your Father was in the Watch same as me.

Mabel: R-really?

Randy: Oh yeah, Went on a lot of adventures together, him and I.

Randy then leaned back on the Couch as he remembered.

Randy: Ah those were the days, Marching like Badasses… Beating up Rats and Firebenders… Kinda like what you've been doing on your way here.

Dipper shrugged in agreement.

Mabel: Nah I still don't believe it, I always thought Mom was Eligible to be in the Watch.

Sharon: Actually, She was.

Mabel: Seriously?

Sharon: Oh yeah, Served alongside her Brother too, Never saw her in action myself though, She could kick the shit out of… Anything that screwed with her, Or her Family.

Randy: Pft Yeah, Go figure…ish.

Dipper: Yeah that Pretty much sums up Mom.

Randy: Yeah and I… Totally cool with her, Your Dad saw a lot of things in her and I just… Was totally fine with it.

Sharon: Sure you were.

Randy: Besides, She let Henry be the best man at his Wedding didn't he?

Dipper: You were the best man?

Randy: Duh, Haven't I've been saying we were inseparable?

Sharon: Ish.

Randy: I got proof!

Randy got off the couch and searched his Pockets until he pulled out a small picture and showed it to Dipper and Mabel.

Randy: Here.

Dipper and Mabel stared, The sunlight blurred the faces of their Parents, But Randy's face, Albeit with longer hair was right there, His arms warped on Their Dad's shoulder.

Mabel: This was… Their wedding day?

Randy: Yep, Now do you believe me?

Dipper was silent for a moment.

Dipper; Do you… Do you have anything else that belonged to him?

Randy thought for a moment.

Randy: A few things, I think I have one right…

He went upstairs and searched his office. He soon came back down with a sword and scabbard, which he handed to Dipper.

Mabel: What is…

Randy: That is, er, Was… Your father's sword, Form his service in the Freedom watch.

Dipper Unsheathed the sword and managed to hold it up, He looked upon it in awe.

Randy: Ha Ha, Your Father had the same reaction when he received it, Brought it along on so many adventures with it, Oh I could tell you both stories.

Randy sighed.

Randy: I wish he were… Still alive, He would have loved to see you both here, Show you the Town himself.

Dipper Seethed the sword.

Dipper: Why did our Parents leave?

Randy and Sharon glanced at each other.

Randy: Well… Quite a few reasons… One, He wanted to be there for you, Second Uh… Let's just say war can… do things to a man… But most of all, Because of Lord Jargafar.

Dipper's eyes widened at the name.

**Flashback.**

_Scratch: They never told you? Why do you think the Dark lord Sacked your town? Conquest? Pleasure?_

_Dipper slowly took up his blaster._

_Scratch: No… Because your Parents were there… And you… you were a bonus!_

**Flashback end.**

Dipper: Jargafar was after our Parents…

Mabel: What?

Randy: Yes… Wait how do you know that?

Sharon: Did your Uncle tell you?

Dipper: No… It was Scratch Ironclaw.

Randy: IronClaw?! He told you?

Dipper: While trying to Slash me apart yeah.

Randy: You mean… You uncle hasn't told you either?

Dipper: No, When I asked him about he just brushed it off.

Mabel: Yeah, Uncle Harrod And Aunt Valory have done the same.

Sharon: So you never once questioned what exactly was going on when… Uh, You know what… Happened?

Dipper: No… Not really.

**Flashback.**

_Dipper and Mabel sat in that room for Four hours, Scared and confused, Waddles nuzzled Mabel in comfort._

_Dipper: Hey… How are you holding up?_

_Mabel: I… I don't know…_

_Dipper: Yeah…_

_Mabel: Dipper, Those Rat's could've been lying right?_

_Dipper: Yeah Maybe… They could have been toying with us… Maybe Mom And Dad got away, Maybe they went somewhere to hide._

_Mabel: Yeah, Maybe they're safe, Maybe they're fine… Maybe… They're not… dead…_

_Mabel began to Cry, Tears seeping out of her Closed Eyelids, Dipper started doing the same, At that moment the Twins embraced each other and sobbed._

_By the time they stopped crying, an Otter guardsman came over and knelt down to their level._

_Guard: Your Aunt and Uncle are here._

_Harrold and Valory Testaburger soon came in and Embrace the Twins, Harrold took Dipper and Harrold took Mabel._

_Valory: Oh Dipper, Mabel, We're so Sorry…_

_Harrold: Everything will be fine… We swear._

_Dipper and Mabel rested their heads on their Aunt and Uncle's Shoulders._

**Flashback end.**

Dipper: Two days later they split us up.

Randy: I'm… Taking you kids home.

**Meanwhile.**

Sheila: And I myself was not aware of this terrible show, But I have a clip to show what I mean, Larry if you will.

Larry the Lynx turned on the TV beside Sheila and the Clip played.

_Terrance: Hey Phillip, Guess what?_

_Phillip: What?_

_Terrance: Fart! (farts)_

Larry then turned it off.

Sheila: Now apparently, That's supposed to be funny somehow?

A man in a Red Truckers Hat named Stuart began laughing.

Stuart: He farted right on his hand!

Everyone stared at him, Making subside abruptly.

Nova: With all due respect Mrs. Brovflowski If this show is that bad, Why not make our kids not watch it?

Sheila: No, Making our kids not watch it is not enough, Neither is Boycotting it, We need to take this show off the air!

A murmur arose from the Audience.

Chef: Take it off the air?

Rat: I admit this show leaves much to be desired but take it off the air?

Mole: Feels a bit much don't you think?

Sheila: All those in favor?

Hesitantly, The ensemble raised their hands.

**Meanwhile,**

Sokka: So Dipper and his sister have bean hanging out with… Their Dad's buddy or something.

Jack: You could say that.

Katara: What's wrong with that?

Mac: Yeah I like Randy.

Mark: None of you… know Randy Marsh, He is practically the Epidime, of Stupidity and Insanity, There's no telling what God Damned Shenanigans he could put those kids through.

Dib: Didn't you and Jack just say he was Dipper's dad's best friend.

Mark rounded on Dib.

Mark: Yes and Believe me that is the Worst thing about him!

Brian: Well maybe they need this, You know they both lost the same loved one so maybe hanging out might help them come to terms with the fact that Henry's gone.

Mark sighed.

Mark: Maybe you're right Brian, I'm just worried he might tell them-

Suddenly the door burst open.

Randy: You son of a Bitch!

Mark: Oh Randy Hi we just-

Before Mark could say anything more, Randy rammed into him, And Slammed in against the wall with his Right hand around his neck.

Sokka: Ah!

Katara: Whoa!

Jack: Jesus!

Stewie: Wow.

Trevor: Hilarious.

Kitty: What?

Mark struggled in Randy's grasp, He managed to Pry Randy's fingers off him and He Dropped to the Floor gasping.

Mark: Huh… Huh… What the Hell?!

Randy: Shut up! I'm gonna kick your ass!

Randy nearly attacked him Further but Jack managed to hold him back by the Arms!

Randy: You… You sniveling Ass, You spent god knows how many months with that kid and you didn't tell him a thing! Not a single mention!

Jack: We were kinda busy not Dying!

Randy rounded on the Fox.

Randy: You still could have tried!

Mac: Hi Randy!

Randy: Oh Hi Mac.

Mark rose to his feet and Rubbed his neck.

Mark: Okay Listen, What the Hell are you talking about?

Randy: I'll tell you what I'm talking about! You said Britney Spears was so irrelevant she shouldn't even be considered Relevant!

Jack: What?

Randy: Oh sorry, Wrong thing to be mad about, You didn't tell Dipper about his Dad!

Mark: What didn't I tell- Oh god… What? That Henry was a victim of PTSD?

Randy: I… Honestly left that part out.

At that Moment Dipper and Mabel came into the Room.

Mark: Look I don't want them finding out about the things between Their Parents and Jargafar.

Dipper: Okay seriously we're right here!

Everyone turned to look in surprise.

Mark: Dipper! Mabel! Uh… How was-

Mabel: You've got some explaining to do!

**Meanwhile.**

Sharon was talking to Sheila on the phone.

_Sheila: So that's the story Sharon, We're going to New york to take Terrance and Phillip off the air, you coming?_

Sharon: Not really, I kinda have stuff to do right now Randy's taken the twins home and I it's my turn to do the Dishes.

Marvin: Kill my Billy!

Sharon: Make sure his Dad doesn't kill himself, And also Stan's friends are over.

_Sheila: Well just make sure they don't watch that Show alright?_

Sharon: Okay.

And Sharon hung up, At that Moment Shelly hurried up.

Shelly: Mom! Stan's trying to Kill Grandpa!

Sharon: What?

Sharon then looked up to see Marvin Suspended over her with a Noose around his Throat.

Marvin: A little Harder Billy…

There was a yelp from the kitchen and Marvin Fell to the Floor.

Sharon: Oh my God Stanley!

Marvin: Damn it I was so close!

Stan came out of the Kitchen, Followed By Kyle Cartman and Kenny.

Stan: Mom I swear, I had no Idea what Grandpa wanted me to do, I uh…

Sharon: Young Mom, Whatever you were-

A knock came at the door.

Sharon: One Moment.

She went to the Door.

?: Marsh Residence?

Sharon: Yes, And I'm a little Busy… Uh making sure you come back another time.

Sharon hastily slammed the door, Only for a hand to catch it.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark: Kids you don't need to trouble yourselves.

Dipper: Not even if it involves our Parents?

Randy: Yeah, Not even if it involves their Parents?

Mabel: You owe us some goddamn Answers!

Randy: Yeah you owe them some-

Randy's phone started ringing.

Randy: Hang on I'll be a sec, Hello?

_Sharon: Randy! _

Randy: Sharon?

_Sharon: Randy! You gotta come home!_

Randy: Okay, Okay I will just as soon as we rap up this issue.

_Sharon: Randy! NO-_

Randy than Hung up.

Randy: Now what was I saying? Oh Right, What Mabel said, You them some Goddamn-

Dipper: Could you stop that!?

Randy belt up instantly.

Dipper: In fact, Everyone in the other room now!

Randy: Uh… Okay.

Jack: Sure…

Aang: This is gonna be awkward.

Wendy: Why am I even here?

Stewie: Que sad montage after this.

Jack and the others Cleared the Living room, Leaving Dipper, Mabel and Mark alone.

Mabel: Start talking.

**Meanwhile.**

Sharon, Shelly, Stan, Marvin, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny struggled and shouted through the bonds around their Mouths, As they were tossed into a closet.

?: So none of you are gonna tell me where they are? Shame, But don't worry I already know, Get the Car Ready boys.

?: Bash and Bob are already one it Biss.

?: Good work Slash, Get Mash, Tell him we're leaving, Ignore the Cartoon.

Slash: Sure thing, Pretty funny Cartoon though.

Slash went off.

?: Don't worry, I won't hurt them, But the Lord Jargafar will.

And the Door slammed shut.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark: Kids you have to understand, The truth is more than you can handle.

Dipper: More than we can handle? Do you even know what we went through in Gravity falls?!

Mark: What did you go through?

Dipper: ...That's… More than you can handle…

Mark: There you see-

Mabel: Don't flip the Subject! Randy told us about our Parents being in the Freedom watch, Evan showed us their Wedding photo!

Mark: Seriously?! Oh damn it-

Dipper: He even told us they quit because of Jargafar, Why?

Mark: He told you Jargafar wanted you dead?!

Dipper: No, Scratch told me before he died, And you knew about it didn't you? Jargafar didn't just attack our town for Conquest didn't he?

Mark sighed.

Mark: Look, I'm sorry if I kept you kids in the dark.

Mabel: If?

Mark: But this whole deal between your Parents and the Dark lord, You didn't need to know about it.

Dipper: Why?

Mark: Because… It's just… Really, Really long and Complicated… No Really, It's that long and Complicated, I mean if we covered it all it would take like three Prequel series to explain.

Mabel: Foreshadowing Spoilers…

Mark; Look, All I can say is this, Jargafar Hated your Parents… Hated anyone related to them, Closely or otherwise, That's why he came after them, And now he's probably after you two as well, Mostly Dipper.

Dipper: WHAT?! But why?

At this point, THe others came out from the other room.

Jack: Did he really just ask that?

Stewie: You killed his top lieutenant Remember?

Wendy: I thought we covered this already.

Dipper: It's been 4 weeks, It's starting to fade on me!

Dib: Pretty sure you had PTSD over it.

Dipper said nothing.

Mabel: So that's it? That's what you've been hiding from us? That a jerk face wants to Kill us?

Mark: Yes and… I was expecting you to be more scared by this.

Dipper: Yeah well, It's not really the first time people tried to kill us, In fact we've nearly died Several times in the past it's not even traumatizing.

Jack: So all that secrecy was for nothing?

Dipper: The Jargafar part, Yeah… The fact that my Dad grew up here…

Mark: Ah yeah… He didn't really tell you either did he?

Mabel: No, And neither did you.

Stewie: Anyone know how long this chapter has gone on?

Mark: Kids please, Your parents-

Dipper: Wanted to protect us, Pfft Like that' never been heard before.

Mac: It's true that excuse is pretty overrated.

Outside, A Car pulled up, While everyone was distracted, And a certain figure emerged again.

Vana: Okay at this point this has been dragged out can we-

Suddenly, Something burst into the House, Four Creatures surged in and attacked everyone, One Swiped His Claws at Jack causing his to trip and hit his head on a nearby table and another Bigger one Grabbed Dib and Vana throwing them into Kitty, Trevor and Eric, Aang shot a jet of Air at the other two Goons, but they dodged it and pinned him down.

Katara: Aang!

Randy: What the!?

Mark: We're under attack!

Mac pulled out a pistol, only for it to be kicked out of his hand, And he was subsequently knocked out by a punch, That same figure than Grabbed Mabel.

?: Not so fast.

The Figure was a Woman stood over Mac unconscious body as she held Mabel in an Armlock, She had Blonde hair, A white skimpy dress, Her face Reeked of Makeup and she had a white collar around her neck.

Holli Would: Now take it easy boys, No need to play dirty.

Mark and Randy: Holli Would?!

Holli: In the flesh, The dark lord sends his regards.

Mark: What do you want?

Holli: Isn't it obvious? The kids, Lord Jargafar wants them.

Sokka: We were just talking about that.

And with that Sokka threw his boomerang, Only for Slash to catch it and throw it at Katara, Hitting her square in the head, After knocking out Aang, Bob lunged at Sokka and started… Kissing him.

Sokka: AH! NO! I"M STRAIGHT!

Mark: Let my Niece go, Would!

Holli: No can do Testaburger, The dark lord really wants these kids.

She then pulled a gun out and aimed it at Mabel's head.

Dipper: Mabel!

Dipper then found himself grabbed by Mash.

Mark, Wendy, Randy, Brian and Stewie were the last one's not beat up, But couldn't stop Holli, Without her hurting Mabel, Holli and her goons took Dipper and Mabel back to the car.

Holli: Now that that's settled, Lets get on our way.

Mabel: W-what are you going to do to us?

Holli: Oh you'll see.

And with that they got in the car and drove off, Just as Mark, Randy, Wendy, Brian and Stewie rushed outside to see the car go.

Mark: Oh shit… We've got to go after them!

**Meanwhile.**

Sheila: We are spreading the word to this establishment that we want better television for our children!

The crowd cheered.

Sheila: We want long quality television, like full house.

Mr Garrison: I don't even like full house.

Not too far from the Protest in an abandoned warehouse, Holli would watch as Dipper and Mabel Struggled against their Shackles.

Holli: Now you two be good little kiddies and stay here.

She then walked over to a Computer screen, Which turned on to reveal Tak.

Tak: Yes?

Holli: I have the Pines twins as the Lord commanded.

Tak: Excellent, Lord Jargafar will be pleased, I'm rather surprised you managed to pull this off with relative ease.

Holli: Not really that hard, Just a couple of harmless brats, How hard could it have bean?

Tak: Do not be so quick to underestimate them, I don't know about the Girl, But the Boy is definitely not to be trifled with, Especially after what happened to Ironclaw.

Holli: You mean when you stood around and watched?

Tak growled.

Tak: Be glad, I'm not in front of you now Would, Otherwise the retort for that insult wouldn't be… Pleasant, And what about the Freedom watch? And the rest of the town.

Holli: They are too busy trying to get some Cartoon banned that they didn't even know, And I've already taken care of those that didn't, We await the pickup now.

Tak: Excellent, A small detachment from our Air force has been sent to your location, Just make sure those twins remain here until they come.

Holli: As you command Lieutenant Tak, Nothing can stop us now.

**Meanwhile.**

The Car raced down the roads of New york and skidded at a turn left.

Mark: We've got to get the twins before Holli would deliver them to Jargafar!

Randy: I'm going as fast as I can!

Wendy: Mind telling me why we didn't bring the others?

Mark: There was no time! They'll be alright! Stewie how's the tracker?

Stewie looked at his ipad.

Stewie: It seems Would's Car is parked at an old warehouse not far from Cartoon central, That must be where Would has Dipper and Mabel.

Mark: Than that's where we go.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at Cartoon central… Things were going nowhere and Moms shackled their Necks to the Building… For some reason.

Carol: Ah forget it, This is never gonna work.

Sheila: It will Carol, It has to.

Just than A man came outside.

Otto: Hey look, The President of the Network!

President: Ladies and Gentleman, My name is John Worsaw, I've prepared a statement for you on behalf of the network.

He then Put on some glasses and took out a piece of paper, Clearing his throat to read it.

President: Fuck you!

Everyone stared in shock. (Well almost everyone.)

President: Thank you ladies and gentlemen, If there are any questions you may direct them to that brick wall over there.

He then started to go back inside.

Sheila: Hey! You will not get away with this!

The President looked back and Mooned the Audience, Causing them to gasp, Satisfied he went back inside.

Sheila: That does it, No more Mr Nice Protestors! It's time for plan B!

Liane: Uh, What's plan B?

Sheila: Oh you'll see…

Suddenly Randy's car zoomed past!

Carol: Was that Randy?

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper and Mabel stood up against the pool, They had managed to get the chains of their Shackles loose and were now standing apart from each other on opposite ends of the pole.

Dipper: Okay Mabel, On the count of Three, One. Two. Three!

The twins whipped their chains into the air and over the pole, which was not connected to the ceiling.

Mabel: Okay good, Now let's get these off and get out of here.

Holli: Not so fast kiddies!

Holli Would stood there with her goons, Dipper and Mabel gulped.

Holli: nobody said anything about you getting away.

Outside, Stewie watched from the window and gave an all clear to the others.

Mark: All right that's our que, Time to move!

Wendy: Let's get these Pricks!

As Holli would and Her Minions closed in on the twins, Mark and the others burst in and Charged them!

Hooli: What the?!

Randy ran up and Punched Mash in the face, While Wendy Proceed to whack Bob's head with a baseball bat, Brian held a Broken Bottle at Slash, Who swatted back with his Claws, Bash nearly got the Drop on Brian with a Chair, Only for Stewie to jump down on him.

Mark rushed in on Holli and Knocked her aside with this Shield, Then he slashed the Chains on Dipper and Mabel's Shackles.

Mark: C'mon we have to go!

The Gang all rushed out.

Holli: Stop them!

Mark and the others all Hurried to the car and piled into it.

Mark: Drive Man Drive!

Randy slammed his foot and on the gas pedal and Sped off, Holli and her goons rushed outside to see.

Holli: There they go! Get the Car!

Randy's car Sped down the Road, Swerving this way and that through the Streets of New york.

Wendy: So what do we do now?

Mark: First we get out of this Damn City!

Suddenly a whirling of Tires was heard behind them as Holli would and her goons cae up behind them.

Brain: Oh Crap they're after us!

Mark: Down this road!

Randy swerved to the left and was met with a traffic jam, He braked the car and turned around, Just a Holli would nearly caught up adn did the same.

Stewie: Their still after us!

Suddenly a Harpoon protruded through the roof!

Holli: Tear off the Roof!

Mash pulled on the chain and Ripped the Roof right off of Randy's car.

Randy: Oh come on!

Sheila: The network is not taking us seriously! Throughout our People's history, Our Ancestors died for what they believed in, And that's what we'll do now! Ready?

A giant slingshot had been prepared and Stuart stood inside it.

Sheila: Mr McCormick, You will be a Martyr to us all!

Stuart: Hey wait I never agreed to this!

But before anything else could Happen, Randy's car sped through the Polls knocking them over, Holli's car followed.

Sheila: Oh… Uh… That happened… Uh… Okay I give up let's go home.

Mark: We're not getting anywhere with you driving, I'm taking over!

Randy: Oh hell no This is my car!

Mark and Randy started fighting over the steering wheel, By the time Randy managed to shove off Mark, They had already found themselves at the edge of a stairway and screamed as they richeched off it in slow motion!

_Well this might as well be where we stop, This chapter has taken so long that the deadline-_

Dipper: Hey! See this to the End!

_Okay fine, Jeez._

As the Slow motion stopped, They soared through the air and landed with a crash, Luckily none was hurt. (YEAH! THOAMS THE TANK ENGINE QUOTE!)

As the Heroes managed to get themselves up, Holli would and her goons were upon them!

Holli: Well, Isn't this cute, Guess I should have dealt with you guys back at the House, My mistake.

Mark got up and stood in front of the kids, His sword and Shield turned on.

Mark: It might as well be your last.

Holli: Really? Well how about-

_So Holli sicks her goons on Mark but he Kills them all, Than Holli kicks Mark in the Balls, Than Randy comes up, Beats the shot out of her and sends her Running for her Life, And we all go home, The end._

Sharon: So… That's it?

Dipper: Yeah There was gonna be some other stuff but we're running out of time at this point.

Wendy: I think we can add more.

**Rewind.**

Randy: Well this has been a day.

Mark: I guess, You know Randy, I guess… Maybe your Not as stupid and Annoying as you might seam, You really helped keep the kids safe today, Thank you.

Randy: No Problem Mark, Let it never be said That there was any beef between the Marshes and Testaburgers.

Dipper: Okay so no Romeo and Juliet drama?

Mark: What are you talking about?

Mabel: Uh, Uncle Mark, You guys know that Your Brother Daughter and his Son are dating right?

Mark and Randy's eyes widened and Looked at Wendy who shrugged.

**Present.**

Wendy: And now their shocked beyond belief.

Stan: You think they'll…

Wendy: Yeah.

Dipper: Hey Mrs Marsh… Does Randy Have anymore… Memoirs between him and My dad?

Sharon: Well… There is this Scrapbook.

Shaorn pulled out a small booklet.

Sharon: Would you like to see it?

Mabel: Yes! Yes!

So Sharon Opened the book and began showing Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Wendy and Shelly every childhood adventure between Randy Marsh & Henry Pine.

**To be Continued.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Episode 27.**

**All dogs like to F? #K.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

Dipper mentally groaned as he waited for the Bus, He had been signed up for football practice and was now waiting with Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny and Mabel for the bus to come pick them up.

Kyle: Hm, I wonder where the Bus is? We're gonna be late for Football practice.

Dipper: Good.

Mabel: I thought you wanted to play football.

Dipper: When was that?

**Flashback.**

_Dipper was busy watching Ghost harassers._

_Harold: Hey Dipper, I've been thinking of Signing you up for football is that okay?_

_Dipper: Sure whatever._

_Harold: Okay._

**Flashback ends.**

Dipper: God Damn it.

Just then a Dog came up to Stan.

Stan: Hi Sparky.

Kyle: Who's that?

Stan: That's my new dog Sparky, He followed me to the Bus stop.

Stan rubbed Sparky's head.

Stan: Good boy sparky, Who's my Best buddy, Who's a bud, Who's a buddy?

Cartman Gagged.

Cartman: Eh, you're making me sick dude.

Stan: He's part doberman and part wolf, He's the Toughest dog in the ridge.

Cartman: No way, Everybody knows that Bill Sykes dogs are the Toughest dogs in Crossover town.

Stan: Bill sykes? Who's that?

Kyle: Just some crime boss from new york who relocated here.

Dipper: Crime boss?!

Stan: He doesn't cause much trouble these days, At least with the Freedom watch around.

Mabel: I always thought Sylvester was the Toughest dog in town.

Mabel Gestured over to A Large Brown scruffy Greasy looking dog, that could rip you apart in an instant.

Stan: Well, None of them are as vicious as Sparky.

Cartman: Oh yeah? Let's see, Ey! Sylvester!

Stan: Sparky will kick his Ass!

Sylvester stalked over and Growled at Sparky.

Cartman: I'll put a dollar on Sylvester.

Kyle: You're on dude!

The two dogs walked into the street and circled each other, Than SParky pounced on Slyvester!

Stan: That's it Sparky! Kick his… Ass?

Cartman: Huh… He's definitely doing something to his ass…

Mabel: Uh… Would this happen to Bill Sykes dogs too?

Dipper: Well, There goes what little my innocence is left at this point.

Stan: Sparky! Bad dog!

Kenny: (Oh my god, That dogs a Homo.)

Stan: What?!

Dipper: Yeah man, I think your dog is gay.

Stan: What do you mean?

Cartman: Isn't it obvious, That Dog is a gay homosexual.

Stan: He's… Confused, that's all.

Kyle: I'm pretty sure Sylvestors is the confused one.

Mabel: And the one Getting F #ed.

Stan: Sick!

Sylvestor scampered off in fright.

**Later.**

Dipper, Cartman, Stan, Kyle and Kenny had gotten into their football gear along with the Other boys, Mabel sat on the Bleachers with a "Go Dipper" Sign.

Chef: Okay children, I know you're all extremely nervous and Excited about the homecoming game against middle park.

Dipper: Who's Middle Park?

Chef: But just remember what I taught you, That playing football is like making love to a woman, You can't always go her, But when you do, It makes all the trying worth while.

Dipper: … What?

Chef: Now let's start practice.

Chef blew the Whistle and the kids took to the Field, All except Dipper.

Dipper: Chef, Can I… Not do this.

Chef: What do you mean?

Dipper: I'm not doing this, I hate sports.

Chef: Why's that?

**Flashback.**

_Dipper gets trampled in football._

_Dipper gets trampled in Basketball._

_Dipper gets the shit beat out of him in Baseball._

_Dipper gets-_

**Flashback end.**

Chef: Okay I get your point.

Dipper: So can you get me out?

Chef: Sorry, No quitting this time, We need all hands on deck if we're gonna beat Middle park.

Dipper: What? Oh god damn it!

Disgruntled, Dipper trudged back to the field, At that Moment, Randy came over, Followed by Jimbo and Ned.

Randy: Oh hey Chef, How's practice?

Chef: Fine, Thanks for asking Randy.

Jimbo: We just felt we should remind you how important this game is to us Crossover Alumni.

Chef: Elementary school Alumni?

Randy: That's as Far as we got, You think we have a shot at beating the spread against Middle park this year?

Chef: I don't know, What's the spread?

Jimbo: Middle park by Seventy points.

Chef looked out to the field, He could see the Team practicing, Very poorly.

Chef: I don't think we have a chance.

Randy: Bull crap, Not with my Son as Quarterback, Right Stan?

Stan looked over at his Father, Causing him to get hit by the Ball, He picked it up and Lobbed a good thirty feet through the Air, Where it landed in Kyle's Arms.

Dipper: Whoa.

Jimbo: Atta boy!

Randy: Yeah!

Chef: Great pass Stan!

Randy: c'mon guys we gotta get to the Bookeep!

Randy, Jimbo And Ned then went off.

**Later.**

By then Practice had Ended and the Football team were now resting, Or in Dippers case Nursing a few Secures, Not too far away The cheerleading squad had just come out for their own Practice Which Wendy was a part of.

Dipper: ...So much… Tackles…

Cartman: Damn you suck at sports.

Dipper: Oh and you think you're all hot shit?

Cartman: At least I can actually carry my Armor.

Wendy: Probably thanks to you Body Fat.

Cartman: Ey!

Everyone chuckled at Wendy's comment, Evan Dipper, Wendy then sat down next to her Cousin.

Wendy: You holding up okay Cus?

Dipper: I guess so, Ngh, God that still hurts a bit.

Wendy: Why did you even join the team?

Dipper: Misunderstanding with Uncle Harold.

Wendy: Can't you talk with him?

Dipper: Apparently not.

Wendy: Well, that sucks for you.

Dipper: Yeah… I've been through worse.

?: Oh like you're such a survivor Pines.

That sneering voice came from Derek Richards, Who had slunk over to them.

Dipper: What do you want Derek?

Derek: Me? Nothing just wanted to congratulate you, For being a wonderful punch bag, Wonderful achievement, I bet Ironclaw had loads of fun with you.

Wendy: Leave him alone Richards, Your just pissed cause he beat you at the Science fair two weeks ago.

Derek Glared.

Derek: No one asked you Testaburger, Unless you feel comfortable saying things with your boyfriend.

Stan: And what's that supposed to mean?

Derek: Nothing, Just wondering if you happen to spill a few "FrenchFries" on her.

Kenny: (You mean dicks?)

Derek: Ye- Wait what? No I mean the french fry as in food, You eat and- Goes down your- I'm trying to Subtly insult Stan!

Kyle: You sure you wanna do that? He is our best shot at beating

Derek: He is our best shot beating- Yeah, I know and I just. Don't. Care. Nobody does! What the hell is that Anyway?

Derek pointed at Stan's dog.

Stan: Oh that's my dog Sparky, He must have followed me to football practice, Pretty smart.

A girl Named Annie knitts perked up.

Annie: Uh, My dog Anrold follows me to Cheerleading Practice all the time.

Stan: Yeah, But Football and Cheerleading are completely two different- Sparky get down!

As the kids Talked, Sparky had made his way over to Annie's dog and started Humping her like a little bitch! (Forgive my Foul Language.)

Annie: Oh my god! What is he doing to my dog!

Cartman: There he goes again.

Stan: Get down Sparky! Down!

Cartman: Stan forgot to mention that his Dog is a homosexual.

Dipper: And a confirmed Rapist.

Annie: Make him Stop!

When Sparky was finished with Annie's dog, He hurried about, Whimpering and Yelping at what happened, Bill, Fosse and Derek laughed.

Fosse: I'm sure glad my dog isn't gay.

Bill: Yeah, Maybe you should name your dog Sparkette Stan.

Derek: Guys Guys! Not cool guys, You shouldn't make fun of Stan's dog for being gay… You should make fun of Stan for reflecting his Dark side!

Wendy nearly went livid, She almost marched over to Derek, But bebe managed to hold her back.

And the three sauntered off Cackling leaving Stan very uneasy.

**Later.**

At class, Stan still didn't feel better, So he stayed after class to talk with Mr Garrison about it.

Stan: Mr Garrison?

Mr Garrison: Yes Stanley?

Stan: What's a… Homosexual?

Mr Garrison: Oh well, Stanley… You've come to the right person to talk to, Sit down.

Stan sat on the chair next to Garrison's desk, The latter who took off his glasses.

Mr Garrison: Stanley, Gay people, Well… Gay people are evil, Evil right down to their cold black hearts, which pump not blood like yours and mine, But rather a thick vomonus oil that ozes through their rotten weins and clots in their pie sized brains which becomes the cause of their Naziesque pattern of their violent behavior, Do you understnad?

Stan: I guess.

Mr Garrison: Good, I'm glad we had this talk Stanley, Now you go outside and Practice football.

Needless to say, Garrison's philosophy did not leave a good impression on Stan.

**Later.**

After school, Dipper and the others dismounted from the bus, As they got off, Sparky approached them wearing a pink scarf.

Stan: Sparky! Where did you get that pink scarf?!

Stan ripped the scarf off.

Cartman: Man, That is the gayest dog I have ever seen.

Stan: He just needs some training that's all, Sit sparky!

Sparky sat.

Stan: Good boy now shake.

Stan shook Sparky's paw.

Stan: Good boy, Now don't be gay.

Sparky tilted his head, Confused.

Stan: Don't be gay Spark, Don't be gay.

Wendy pinched the bridge of her nose.

Mabel: Did it work?

Stan: I don't know

Cartman: Still looks pretty gay to me.

Bill and Fosse suddenly appeared and laughed.

Fosse: Heh, Heh, Hey Stan! Your dog bean to any pride marches lately?

Bill: Yeah, Maybe you should take him to a Barbara Streisand concert.

The two Assholes then laughed their asses off and walked away.

Dipper: You're walking in the Road asswipes!

Stan shot a glare at his Dog as a Truck came along and Knocked Bill and Fosse out of the way.

**Meanwhile.**

Randy, Jimbo and Ned entered a Place bets bar, They walked up to the Bartender and sat down.

Randy: We want 500 dollars on the South Park cows.

Bartender: Are you crazy.

Jimbo: No siree, I'm telling you We've got the line, My Brothers son Stan is the best quarterback our school has, We guarantee he'll beat the spread.

Others overheard this and started placing their own bets.

Randy: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Don't get carried away now.

Bigwig: You better be right about this Marsh.

Randy: Bigwig, Bigwig, Don't worry about it.

Ned: Hmm, Are you guys sure Stan is that good?

Randy: Uh… Not that sure.

Jimbo: Maybe we should come up with a back up plan.

He quickly thought up one.

Jimbo: Hey Barkeep, What's the halftime show gonna be?

Bartender: You haven't heard? John Stamuses older Brother Richard is gonna sing "Loving you."

Ned: I love that Song.

Randy: That's perfect, C'mon guys, Middle Parks gonna get a halftime show they'll never forget.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper, Mabel, Brian, Stewie, Wendy, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman all stood outside Brian and Stewie's house with Sparky and a Large Crate.

Dipper: Thanks for your… Help guys.

Stewie: I don't even know what's going on.

Mabel: Stan's scaring his Dog straight.

Brian: What?

Stan: Okay Sparky We got you a present, Smuggled in from France by Stewie Were-

Stan then saw the Scarf.

Stan: Damn it Sparky where do you keep getting this thing? No Pink Bandana Sparky Bad dog!

Brian Frowned.

Stan: Now pay attention.

Kyle Opened the Crate with a Crowbar.

Stan: Sparky, This is Fifi!

On que a Pretty Grey Poodle dog emerged from the Crate and walked past Sparky.

Kyle: Oh La La.

Sparky began to follow Fifi.

Stan: Yes! It's working you guys! Atta boy Spark Get her!

Sparky jumped on top of Fifi, But instead the Stuff, He just took off her Collar and flipped it onto his neck, And got off.

Stan: Aw Crap, Now what?

Wendy: Stan, Who cares if your dog is Gay, It's no big deal.

Cartman: No way, My mom says god Hates homosexuals That's why he smoked the satomiese in France.

Stewie: ...What?

Brian: Stan, Why is this such a big deal for you?

Stan: I don't know, Mr Garrison said Gay people are evil but… Sparky doesn't seem Evil.

Kyle: Well, Maybe Mr Garrison is wrong.

Brian: Of course he's wrong, Gay people are just normal people like you and me, Regardless of their preferred tastes, I should know my Cousins gay.

Stewie: It's true.

Dipper: Can we take this inside?

Everyone except Sparky went inside.

Brian: The point is, It should be okay if your Dogs gay.

Stan: No it's not! I don't want a Gay Dog, I want a Butch dog, I want a Ran Tan Tan!

Outside, Sparky heard Stans words through an Open window and Sadly wandered away, He took one last look at the Marsh house and Turned to the Sunset, Which he made his way to.

**The Next day.**

Chef: Now Children, We've got to Handle the ball better, You've got to hold the Football like you would hold your lover, Gently, But firmly.

Chef then broke out into a Song.

Chef: _You wanna be both nuitering and clingling at the same time, Oh yeah, Just like making sweet love to the football, Be naughty with the football._

Dipper: Ew.

Kyle: Uh Chef?

Chef: _Ever so Gently._

Kyle: Chef.

Chef: _Spank it._

Kyle: CHEF!

Chef: Oh what? Uh Sorry Children, Uh, Lets run some plays.

And the boys ran out into the field, From the side of the School wall, Derek watched with Chandler and Terrance.

Derek: Stupid asshole… Thinks he's hot shit playing football? Well we'll see how he likes it when he's the laughing stock of the Field.

Chandler: How do we do that?

Derek pulled out a bow and Arrow, Strapped around the Arrow was a Sack containing something inside.

Chandler: What is that?

Derek: This is a little something Mom let me Borrow, You know how in Carrie, She gets pig blood spilled all over her?

Chandler and Terrance looked at each other.

Chandler: Yeah?

Derak: When I fire this over Pines, The Contents in this will come out and Land on him and he'll trip and get Stampeded!

Terrance: What? I thought we were trying to Humiliate him, Not kill him.

Derek: Oh please, Whatever's in this is totally not gonna kill him, Just make him look stupid.

The Sack began to Move about and small noises came from inside.

Derek: Settle down!

Derek then punched the sack.

Derek: Besides, There's no one else preparing this or something close to this.

**Meanwhile.**

Randy: So what we wanna do here Gopher is to make this bomb go off at a specific moment during Halftime.

Gopher: What moment would that be?

Jimbo: Well, John stamos older brother is all set to sing loving you during halftime, We want that bomb to go off when he hits that High F.

Gopher: What High F?

Randy: You know. _Loving you! It's easy cause you're Beautiful Du in Du Du AHHH!._

Gopher: Alright Alright, So you want the trigger on the Du in Du Sonny.

Jimbo: No on the AHHH!

Gopher: Okay.

**Meanwhile.**

The team had taken a break.

Wendy: Stan what's wrong?

Stan: I just… I can't concentrate because my Dog is gay.

Dipper: Oh god this again?

Chef overheard this.

Chef: What again?

Mabel: Stan's upset because his dogs a homosexual.

Chef: Well you know what they say, You can't teach a dog straight tricks.

Mr Garrison suddenly came over.

Mr Garrison: Oh stop filling his head with Quer loving Propaganda Chef.

Chef: What? You of all people should be sympathetic.

Mr Garrison: W-What? What do you mean?

Chef: We'll your gay arent you?

Mr Garrison: WHAT? What the hell are you tlaking about I am not Gay!

Dipper: Kinda sound gay.

Mr Garrison: That's just my voice!

Wendy: And I've glimpsed you behaving gay.

Mr Garrison: I just do it to get chicks.

As Garrison continued to feebly defend himself, Stan noticed something.

Stan: Hey? Where's Sparky? He usually follows me to football practice.

Cartman: Maybe he went shopping for some leather pants.

Stan Punched cartman in response.

**Meanwhile.**

Sparky trudged through the Raging Cold and snowy winds, He had no idea where he was or where he was going, But he kept going anyway.

As he did he suddenly saw a big Pink Castle, A purple sign with yellow light reading _**Big Gay Al's Big Gay Animal Santuary.**_

Sparky went up to two big Red Doors and they flung open to reveal a Portly Man with Tan skin, He wore a Pink Hawian shirt which was open at the top, A blue Scarf and Brown corduroy Trousers.

Big Gay Al: Hello there little Pup, I'm Big Gay Al.

SParky perked up.

Big Gay Al: Are you an Outcast?

Sparky panted yes.

Big Gay Al: Than I'm so glad you found my Animal Sanctuary, We're all big gay friends here! Would you like to live here with us?

Sparky nodded.

Big Gay Al than ushered Sparky inside.

Big Gay Al: Come on in little Fellow, No one will ever oppress you here… For being gay that is…

Big Gay Al to a glance outside, Than closed the doors.

**Two days later.**

Stan was walking back home with Wendy and Mabel when Stan came up.

Stan: Have you guys seen my Dog? He still hasn't come back?

Dipper: After two days?

Stan: I think he might have run away.

Wendy: Oh that's terrible, You better look for him after the game.

Stan: I'm not playing.

Wendy, Dipper and Mabel were shocked.

Mabel: You What?!

Stan: I need to go find my dog, You coming Dipper?

Dipper: What!? No way, Last time I went with you, Your Sister nearly caved my Skull in!

Stan: You'll get out of Football.

Dipper: I'm in!

Mabel: Hey, Hey wait what about the Game!?

But they were already gone.

Wendy: Aw son of a Bitch!

**Meanwhile.**

Randy Jimbo and Ned snuck over the Middle park elementary school's wall, They found a Small Stable with a horse inside and Jimbo planted the Bomb on it.

Ned: What are we doing exactly?

Randy: Well you see, We usually kidnap Middle Park mascot, But this year, We're gonna booby trap it instead.

Jimbo: And when John Stamos' older brother hits that high F, BOOM! No more middle park players.

Ned: Sounds cool.

**Meanwhile.**

Wendy and Mabel were getting themselves dressed.

Wendy: Okay Mabel, Since Dipper and Stan are out, We're gonna have to take their place, Put on this Hairnet.

Mabel put on her Hairnet While Wendy did the same.

Mabel: But who will wave the Go Dipper flag?

Wendy: No one! Dippers not here!

Mabel: But we're impersonating Dipper.

Wendy: I know that! So?

Mabel: So who's gonna take ours?

Wendy: I already paid someone to dress up as me.

Mabel: Well I paid Waddles to dress as me.

She gestured to her pig, Who wore a mop and a sweater.

Wendy: ...Why?

Mabel: To be me, Silly.

Wendy deadpanned, Suddenly Trumpets started to play.

Wendy: The game!

**Later.**

Wendy and Mabel hurried outside and joined the two teams, Just as the Announcer began to speak.

Hamin: Hello Everyone this is Frank Hamin, Crossover town radio head 900, Welcome to today's matchup between, The Middle Park cowboys and the Crossover town Cows.

Chef looked at Wendy and Mabel suspiciously.

Chef: Stan? Dipper? What took you so long?

Wendy: What? Uh… Nothing, Right Dipper?

Mabel: Uh yeah we were just- Hey is that-?

Wendy elbowed Mabel to shut up, Among the Cheerleaders (who were oblivious to who Wendy really was for Plot convenience.) Was… Sokka, With a Black mop o flong hair and a Beret.

Sokka: This is… Not humiliating.

Mabel: You got one of Dipper's badass friends to dress as you?!

Wendy: He's dressed in drag before so why not.

Chef: C'mon boys in the field!

Mabel and Wendy hurriedly joined the other kids in the Field.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper and Stan trudged through the storm and soon came upon Big Gay Al's Animal Sanctuary.

Dipper: What the heck is that?

Big Gay Al suddenly appeared at the door.

Big Gay Al: Hi little Fella's how are both you doing today?

Stan: Uh… Fine how are you?

Big Gay Al: I'm super Thanks for asking.

Dipper: I'm Dipper and this is Stan… His dog ran away and we were wondering if he came here.

Big Gay Al: Well lets see.

The boys Followed Al inside and found al kinds on Non-Anthropomorhic Homosexual Animals.

Stan: Do you have alot of Gay Animals here?

Big Gay Al: We have all sorts of Gay Animals around here, Over here we have a gay Lion.

Gay lion: Roar.

Big Gay Al: And we have Gay Waterbuffalo, Gay Humming Bird, And here's a gaggle of Gay Gooses.

Dipper: Wow, Alot of Gay Animals here.

Stan: and seem really happy too.

Big Gay Al: Of course it is Silly bums, Its the one place Gay Non-Anthromorphs can really be themselves, You like to Dance?

Big Gay Al hit a light and a dance floor lit up, Gay Animals began dancing everywhere.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the Game.

Wendy: Okay Cartman you hike the Ball, Then I'll throw it to Kyle and he'll try and score, Ready?

All: Break!

The Team took their positions.

Cowboy leader: You guys are toast.

Cowboy: Yeah, We're gonna pound your head in.

Cartman: We'll just see about that.

Cartman took hold of the Ball and passed through his legs to Wendy.

Hamin: The ball is set, Middle Park blitzes!

Middle Park Cowboys instantly piled onto Wendy and snatched the Ball.

Hamin: What's This? Stan lost the Ball! Middle Park runs it in for a touchdown! The score is 7 to Nothing! Middle park with 14.57 remaining in the first corner.

Randy: What the Hell Stan!

Randy was Grabbed by a Blue Cat.

Nichole: If we lose our Money thanks to you, Your Dead Marsh!

Jimbo: Hey, Don't worry… Just wait until Halftime.

**Meanwhile.**

Stan and Dipper searched through the Lights And Dancing Animals for Sparky, Until at last Stan saw him.

Stan: Sparky!

Stan hurried over to him.

Stan: Hiya Sparky, How's it going?

Sparky barked.

Stan: I missed you old pal, You really had me scared, C'mon Dipper and I can Still make it to the Game! Than we can work on not making you gay some more.

Sparky sat down at the last part.

Stan: Sparky?

Dipper: Are you kidding me?!

Big Gay Al: Hmm, Looks like your friend still doesn't understand.

Stan: What don't I understand?

Big Gay Al: Come this way.

**Meanwhile.**

Hamin: Just over a minute to go and a half and the score is Middle Park cowboys 52 to Crossover town cows 0.

Cartman Hiked the Ball to Mabel, Who was instantly tackled and beaten.

Meanwhile, Derek and his Lackeys lurked behind the Bleachers, Derek smirked as he Pulled a bow out.

Derek: If that Pines asshole thinks he can't suffer enough, Just wait until this Happens, Tie up the Sack Chandler!

Chandler Presented the Arrow with the Sack tie to it, Derek took it in his hand and notched the Bow.

**Meanwhile.**

Big Gay Al: Alright Kids, Consider yourselves the First guests for my Big Gay Boat ride!

Al led them to a Small Pink tour boat and they all climbed inside.

Big Gay Al: Hello Everyone, And Welcome aboard the Big Gay boat ride, On this Adventure, We'll be seeing the world of Gayness throguh out time.

The Boat moved Down the River.

Big Gay Al: You see, Gayness has existed since the beginning of time, From Pre-Merge Egyptian Pharaohs, To Pre-Merge Shoguns of Japan, Uh oh, Look out It's the Oppressors, Christians and Republicans and Nazi's oh my! Along with the big bad… Uh Actually we won't go into them.

Dipper: Into who.

Big Gay Al: Uh… you know the uh… Oh I know lets steer our Big Gay Boat out of here and to a place where gays are allowed to live Freely.

The boat drew up to a door which opened to show Anamatrotic gay people singing and Dancing.

Gay Anamatronics: _We're all Gay and It's okay_

_Cause gay means happy and Happy means gay! _

_We're not sad anymore, Cause we're out the Closet door._

_It's okay- to be Gay!_

Big Gay Al: so what do you think Stan.

Stan: This kicks ass! I'm Sorry I tried to change you Spark, I just didn't understand.

Dipper: Mr Al, What was that Fourth thing before?

Big Gay Al: What? Oh that? You… know What.

Suddenly a harsh knowing was heard at the door.

Big Gay Al: Oh shoot…

Big Gay Al went to the Main hall, Followed by Stan, Dipper and Sparky, All the Animals suddenly scurried into various hiding places.

Stan: Who is it?

Dipper: The fourth thing?

Big Gay Al: Well… Not quite, It's what I-

Suddenly the Door burst open and Seven Men poured in, All armed with Guns.

The Man in the Middle walked forward, He was a Skinny Man, With a black leather jacket, Black jean trousers, Black boots and had brown hair.

?: Well, Well, Well, Big Gay Al, Bean looking for you, How you doing?

Big Gay Al: I'm super… Thanks for Asking, Mr Sykes.

Dipper: Sykes? Bill Sykes.

Stan: No… I think that's one of his Brothers.

Sykes: Ben Sykes, My Brother Bill's top crime lord and my Brother Baryy leads a hunting Party.

Big Gay Al: And you lead the biggest Villain Mercenary faction in the Lands.

Ben Sykes: Ah yes, The A.C.S we're called Or as we're Formally known.

Big Gay Al: The Animal Cruelty Squad.

Ben Sykes: Ah that's right, I was just about to say that.

Big Gay Al: What is it that you want Sykes?

Ben Sykes: Nothin, just… Browsing, For nice good Animals.

Stan: If you wanna oppress gays.

Ben Sykes: Oppress gays? Me? No, I quite Respectful towrds gays, One of my boys are gay, Ain't you Arnold.

A short Man with a Blue vest gave a wave.

Ben Sykes: So, Al where are the Animals, I see one right there.

Sparky hid behind Stan.

Big Gay Al: We'll there may be a few Animals here or there but there not for you.

Ben Sykes: Oh? Who said we were buying, We just want to Kill a few and Torture some.

Big Gay Al: That's all? Well all I can say to that is… HAVE LEAD!

Big Gay Al suddenly pulled out a Machine Gun and began firing at Ben Sykes and his men, They all scrambled for cover as Al kept firing.

Big Gay Al: You've tortured enough Animals you scum!

Ben Sykes: Get his Ass!

Sykes Men popped from their Hiding places and Fired on All, Who took cover in a coroner with the Boys.

Big Gay Al: Boys! Take your Dog and get out of here, I'll cover you!

Dipper: We can't just leave you and the Other gay animals alone!

Stan: Hang on, I have a Plan!

**Meanwhile.**

Hamin: And now, Here to sing loving you is the one and only John Stamos Brother.

As the song began, Randy and Jimbo spotted Erique near the Cowboys and Grinned, Richard Stamos took to the Stage and began to sing.

Richard Stamos: _Loving you-_

_Is easy cause you're Beautiful!_

_Do in Do Do Do Do!_

_Ah!_

_Ah!_

Jimbo: What the Hell?! Where's the high F?

Mr Mackey: Yeah, Richard Stamos can't sing a High F he always screws it up like this.

Randy: Oh god we're screwed!

Behind the Bleachers, Derek still was aiming at Mabel.

Derek: Prepare for Fun Pines!

**Meanwhile.**

While Ben Sykes and his Gang continued their Barrage, Big Gay Al had seamingly given up his.

Ben Sykes: Come on Out Ally, We'll only blow your brains out!

There came no reply, Suddenly the Minions couldn't fire their guns anymore.

Ben Sykes: What the? Arnold? Murry? What's going on?

Murry: Our guns ain't firing, We're out of Amo.

Dipper: Lucky for us?

Ben and his men turned to see, A whole Gang of Gay animals Snarling right at them.

Stan: I think you might wanna run.

Sykes men screamed and ran out of there as fast as they could, Ben followed to But stopped to look back.

Ben Sykes: You're lucky I didn't bring the Entire Faction.

And he Ran off.

Big Gay Al: Well thank you boys for Everything.

Dipper: Your Welcome Big Gay Al, Thank you for helping us.

Stan: We'd like to stay but we gotta get back to the big game.

And with that, Stan, Dipper and Sparky headed off.

Big Gay Al: Oh, Stan, Dipper, When you guys go back to town, Tell them about us will you? Tell them there are gay animals here, Who need homes, Desperately.

Dipper: We will Big Gay Al.

And Dipper, Stan and Sparky set off for home.

**Meanwhile.**

Hamin: These Crossover town cows are being absolutely molested by these Cowboys.

Mr Garrison: I thought you said Beating the Spread was a sure thing Randy!

Mr Hat: Yeah! We all put our life savings in this game.

Randy: I didn't say this game was sure! Jimbo did!

Richard Waterson: You! Jimbo, What's the Difference?

Jimbo: We're gonna die.

Mabel had been knocked over by a Cowboy and was slowly getting to her feet as she did, Derek saw his "Chance."

Derek: Fire in the Sky!

Derek then shot the Arrow into the Air, It flew over Mabel's head and the Sack unfurled, As he fell, A cowboy knocked Mabel out of the Way, The Sack landed and out came a very pissed, Non-Anthropomorphic… Weasel.

Derek: Uh… Was that supposed to...

The Weasel then scurried up and began Biting Scratching and Clawing at Derek's head!

Derek: Ah! Oh God, Somebody Somebody! Someone get it off!

Chandler and Terrance just stared blankly.

Hamin: Well folks that just about wraps it up for- Wait a minute what this?!

Dipper and Stan exited right out of the School building, Much to everyone's shock.

Hamin: Star quarterback Stan Marsh and new play Dipper pines? But then who?

Chef then looked at Wendy and Pulled her Helmet off, Everyone was stunned.

Randy: Well that explains a lot.

Mabel's helmet was also knocked off.

Chef: What the Hell's going on!

Wendy: Uh… Me and Mabel were filling in For Stan and Dipper.

Chef: Well where the Hell were you two?!

Stan: I was out getting my Dog.

Chef: Okay, Mabel Wendy get over here and Boys get in there!

Mabel limped back to the field and handed dipper his helmet and the two boys went into the field.

Jimbo: No idea what just Happened but Give 'em Hell for Real Stan!

The two teams took positions.

Randy: Jesus… I've not asked you for much lately, But all we need is one little score, Please Jesus?

Jesus: leave me alone.

Kyle hiked the Ball to Stan.

Hamin: Stan gets the Ball, Dipper waves his Arms.

Dipper: Stan! I'm open I think!

Stan threw the Ball to Dipper.

Hamin: And he throws it to Dipper!

Dipper ran to the Enemy goal with the Cowboys hot on his Tail, He jumped and Landed on the field as the Cowboys piled on to him.

Hamin: Touch down! Crossover town Beats the Spread!

Everyone Cheered, Stan, Dipper, Mabel and Wendy then took to the Stage.

Mac: Speach!

Hamin: Stan, What do you wanna tell the Town about this Stunning, Almost victory?

Stan: Uh… We finally beat the Spread against the Cowboys!

Everyone cheered.

Stan: And maybe we can beat them more next year!

Everyone cheered again.

Stan: And there's nothing wrong with being Gay!

The Crowd went silent.

Sharon: What?

Dipper: yeah being gay is nothing to be ashamed of.

Mr Garrison: What the Hell are they talking about?

Hamin: Uh Kids… What exactly is going on? Where exactly were you? Why were your Girlfriend/ His Cousin and Sister dressed up like you?

Mark: And why is Sokka dressed as Wendy?

Wendy: Me and Mabel didn't want the Spread not beaten so we pretended to be Stan and Dipper when they left.

Stan: And my dog went missing so Dipper and I went looking for him and we met this Big Gay Al guy, Who showed us all about the wonders of Gayity and we fought Ben Sykes to together.

Jack: WHAT?

Stan: It's true, We'll show you.

**Later.**

Stan and Dipper led everyone to the place where Big Gay Al's Santuary was, But it wasent there.

Stan: But it was here… It was all right here!

Dipper: Yeah there was Big Pink castle and Everything.

Wendy: So you guys left us to impersonate you, To get high on Cough medicine?

Stan: Who said anything about Cough medicine.

Rabbit: Look!

Everyone looked to see All the Gay Animals standing around.

Woman: Oliver!

A woman picked up her cat.

Woman 1: I thought you ran away like a month ago!

Woman 2: Sidney!

Man 1: Wailey!

Man 2: Carlos!

Rat: Where did they come from?!

Big Gay Al: Boys, Thank you for bringing everyone here.

Dipper: Oh there you are, Where's the castle.

Big Gay Al: I packed it up, My work here is done.

Al pulled out a Yellow suitcase and climbed inside.

Big Gay Al: Good-by Kids, Peace be with you!

The suitcase spun around and flew away!

Mabel: Wow, That was cool!

Wendy: So what now?

Dipper: I don't know, A segway into something unrelated to this episode?

Richard Samos suddenly appeared.

Richard Samos: Wait Everyone I can do it!

Toad: Do what?

Richard Samos: _Loving you!  
Is easy cause you're beautiful!_

_Do in Do Do Do!_

_AHHH!_

Randy and Jimbo: NO!

**KA-BOOM!**

Randy: ...It was Jimbo's Idea!

**Meanwhile.**

Derek was wheeled into an Ambulance.

Derek: Somebody get my Mommy! Somebody get my Lawyer! Somebody get me a Nurse, Somebody get me a candy!

Queen Grimhilde glowered at the Image shown to her.

Grimhilde: Why did I ask for this! Mirror, Mirror, On the wall, Return to your Original image!

Magic mirror: What would though now know my Queen?

Grimhilde: Magic Mirror on the Wall, I told you to show my next Conquest!

Magic Mirror: Our forces have already failed to take France, And other territory outside the Kingdom have already been taken.

Grimhilde: Damn… This will not do, I need something or Someone to Increase my power and Turn this war in my Favor.

Warpclaw and Evelyvanna stood off to the Side.

Evelyvanna: My queen, Perhaps if I were to continue my Search for Snow white.

Grimhilde: No need for now, IK demand to know the Status of the Ghouls!

Evelyvanna: They are almost prepared my Queen, the third batch has already been Formed, However they still prove unstable and require someone in-tune to their nature to be controlled.

Grimhilde: Find that someone! Warpclaw.

Warpclaw: Your generals have returned.

The door was opened and two men walked in, One looked like a An Aztec Shoman and the other was a Skeletal being in blueish black robes with Red trim and yellow eyes.

Queen Grimhilde: Ah, Tzekel-Kan and Richard welcome home.

Tzekel-Kan: My queen, I regret to inform you, That our forces were routed from France's borders.

Queen Grimhilde: I know.

Richard: However, We found something else we believe may… Entice you.

Queen Grimhilde: Bring it in.

Two Tribal looking Rats carted in what looked like a large grey Sarcophagus with a triceratops head.

Queen Grimhilde: Excellent…

**To be Continued.**

**Oh my, What had Queen Grimhilde found now? Find out in future installments of Crossover legends, Until next time!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Enjoy the Adventure?**

Dib: What just Happened?

**Enjoy the Reunion?**

Dipper and Mabel: Twins!

**Want more danger?**

Jack: WHAT?

**Then say no more, Cause the fight is far from over!**

Mark: Everyone Run!

**The Misadventures of Dipper.**

Dipper: Can we do anything else?

**Mabel!**

Mabel: Yeah, Thanks to you!

**Dib!**

Dib: My Heads not Big!

**Brian and Stewie!**

Stewie: Well, You've come a long way.

**And all your Favorite Cartoon Characters in this Action Pack, Slice of Lifish, Cheaply made, So terribly un original you want to kill yourself after reading this, Intended to be Brought to life or Not, Adventure of War! Terror! Loss! Hope! And the Freedom these characters strive so hard for, In the face of a Dark Tyrant.**

Fire Lord Ozai: You will learn respect.

**Crossover legends… The Second Season continues.**

Lord Jargafar: I'll get them myself… Hm,Hm,Hm,Mwe,He,He,He,He…


	7. Chapter 7

**Episode 28.**

**The Wrath of Streisand.**

**Previously on Crossover legends.**

Vana: Hey! Hey!

**Uh… What Vana?**

Vana: where the Hell are we?

Dib: Yeah, We've been practically banished to the Background this entire Season, All we've done so far is get beaten up by the Clone of a Dumbasses Son! While Dipper goes galavanting off with his Sister and-

**Okay I'm gonna stop you there Dib, You shouldn't even be using British terminology.**

Dib: Well you shouldn't keep us on the sidelines, We barely had any character development last season!

**Oh come on you guys did too! Vana saved a princess over her freedom and you were betrayed by an Asshole.**

Dib: How was that even considered a life lesson? We were just captured by Assholes and manipulated into their Service.

**Oh god now you sound like a Critic.**

Vana: Well maybe if people actually paid attention to this-

**You know what? You guys are wasting my time. We'll talk later. (Throws them into a Closet.) What was this evan for? What? Grimhilde found something to increase her forces? Okay let's not focus on that, Now onto the Episode.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

One day, Dipper, Mabel and their classmates all went on a field trip to an Archaeological digging site.

Archaeologist Mouse: And so, Since the Merge these Ancient Arrowheads are buried deep down in the Earth's crust, We dig 'em up, Polish them off and find over twelve new Arrow heads every month.

Cartman: Boring.

Mr Garrison was resting on a nearby hill and Called over.

Mr Garrison: Eric be quiet! I'm trying to sleep!

He then put his newspaper back over his face.

Archaeologist Mouse: Now can anybody tell me who left these arrowheads here?

Vana raised her hand.

Archaeologist Mouse: Yes Ma'am?

Vana: Ancient Tribes of the Native Americans.

Archaeologist Mouse: Yes very good, Now grab your Anthropology Pickaxes and dig for our Very one Indian arrowheads.

The Children immediately set to work, They all picked at the Ground with their Picks, Cartman loudly sung to himself as he worked, But no one paid him any attention.

Cartman: _Day is never finished!_

_Master got me workin._

_Someday my master will set me Free!_

Pip: Oh I think I found one!

Pip went to Grab a Arrow head, But Cartman grabbed it too.

Cartman: No I found it!

Pip: No silly, I found it first!

Cartman: No I did Pip!

Pip: No, I did!

Cartman: Well, Guess we have to Roshambo for it.

Pip: What's Roshambo?

Cartman: Well, First I kick you in the balls as hard as I can, Then you kick me in the nuts as hard as you can and we both go back and forth until one of us falls to the ground, THe last one standing gets the arrow head.

Pip wasn't sure.

Pip: Oh, Well I suppose if I must.

Cartman backed up.

Cartman: Alright, here we go.

He ran forward and kicked Pip square in the nuts, Pip Cried out and Fell to the Ground.

Dipper: Jeez that's gotta hurt!

Pip: Well I guess you win.

Cartman: Pft, Whatever i don't evan want this stupid Arrowhead.

He tossed Pip his Arrowhead and Went back to work, Soon Cartman picked up something, It looked like Another Arrowhead.

Cartman: No, It's just a Weird Triangle.

He threw it away and it landed at Kyle's feet.

Kyle: Wow, Check it out Dude.

He picked it up and Examined it, It had little drawings of Serpents on it.

Kyle: It has little Drawings on it.

**I just said that.**

Stan: What is it?

Kyle: I don't know.

Suddenly the small Triangle started to glow a bit, Dipper drew back slightly.

Kyle: Whoa, Cool.

Cartman suddenly stormed over.

Cartman: Ey! That was my triangle!

Kyle: You threw it away, It's mine now.

Cartman: We'll roshambo for it.

Kyle: No way Fatass, It's mine!

Cartman: Antipologist!

The Archaeologist Mouse came over.

Mouse: Hey kids, What the Matter?

Cartman: I found a magic Triangle and this Greedy Asshole took it from me!

Kyle: You threw it away!

Mouse: Hmm, Let me see that.

Kyle handed the Triangle over.

Mouse: Why this is Ansolsy writing! This thing must be thousands of years old!

Cartman: C'mon let me kick you in the nuts for it!

Kyle: No!

And Kyle took the Triangle back and walked away… With Cartman following behind.

**Later.**

News Anchor: And Finally tonight A young boy from Crossover town, Colorado found a mysterious Artifact during a field trip today, Here with a special report, Is Caden the Crow.

Caden: Thanks tom, the little eight year old was very shocked indeed when he came across a very Ancient triangular object.

Kyle: We'll I was just digging around and then I saw this Triangle, Andeveyrone was like "Dude!"

Wendy: I wasn't even there when it happened.

Vana: I don't even know the kid but that Triangle must be as Powerful as the Chaos Emeralds themselves.

Cartman: And I told him, I said Kyle "I will kick you in the Nuts!" But he didn't give it back to me so I kicked him Squaw in the Nuts, And he cried like Nancy Carigan!

Dib: That never happened.

Cartman: Screw you Kahl!

Dib: I'm not Kahl.

Caden: And so the little boy will take his Discovery home and probably donate this to science… Or just keep it in his room or something, Back to you tom.

News Anchor: Thanks Caden those are some cute little kids, Except for that last one he's Fat as fuck."

Cartman: EH!

The screen paused, And a figure rose from her Couch.

?: So it's there…

**Meanwhile.**

Kyle, Stan, Cartman, Kenny, Dipper and Mabel entered Kyle's house when they got back from School.

Stan: So what are you gonna do with the Triangle?

Kyle: I'll keep it in my room where Cartman can't find it.

Cartman: Oh I'll find it don't worry!

Dipper: Don't make deals with it.

Kenny: (What?)

Kyle went to his room and Closed the Door, Lokcing it to, Cartman jiggled with the Handle.

Cartman: God Damn it give me my Triangle Seriously!

Mabel: You did throw it away Cartman.

Cartman: I was… Uh Just setting it aside.

Stan: We'll you might as well let it go.

Cartman: Never! I'm gonna get that triangle if it's the last thing I do!

**Meanwhile.**

Mark sat in his Room as he gazed at the Picture, Lost in his thoughts, He didn't see Antauri coming into the Room.

Antauri: Minnie and Badger have a called a Briefing.

He then noticed the Picture.

Mark: I still think about her Antauri, I still see her sometimes too… In my head, I sometimes hear her voice… I even look at her kids and I still see her younger self.

Antauri: ...You had a lost love didn't you?

Mark: You could say… Wait What?

Antauri: You say you saw her Children as your Ex girlfriend?

Mark: Ex Girl- No! Lily! I'm talking about my Sister, do you even see the Picture?!

Antauri: Yeah, I was just messing with you.

Mark growled.

Mark: Ever since Jargafar got her and Henry, Harrold and I have been trying all we can to keep her kids safe. And so far they've managed to Piss off Several Megalomaniacs and Jargafar himself!

Antauri: Well they've made plenty of Remarkable friends as much as they've made Enemies, Mostly in Dib, Vana, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Eric so it's safe to say they've done well themselves.

Mark: I guess, I didn't really know what I was thinking when I brought Dipper into the Watch, I guess… I just saw a bit of Lily in him, With his Father's Uncle missing at Sea,The Safest course of Action would be to Separate them both so Jargafar wouldn't get them Both… Oh where am I going with this?

Antauri sat beside Mark.

Antauri: You can't keep sheltering them forever, They've already pretty much gotten out of Several situations themselves.

Mark: Hm, They have, So what were you saying before? Minnie and Badger were expecting us?

Mark and Antauri made their way to a Large tent big enough for a whole assembly, Where Jack, Mac, The Monkey team Sokka, Katara, Aang, Dib, Vana and the others at the front of the Room Wer Badger and Minnie Mouse.

Minnie: Everyone, Everyone! If we have your attention.

Badger: As you've heard lately A discovery was made some time ago, By a little boy in our town… Here is someone who Apparently inquires on this matter, And has come to us with some related matter.

A man stepped up to the Center, He had brown hair, and a Gray shaven beard in addition, He wore a Black suit and Red glasses.

Lenard Maltin: Hello Everybody, I come to you for help, Is there a Mark Testaburger here?

Mark rose up.

Mark: That would be me.

Sokka: Hey Aren't you that Movie critic I saw on TV once?

Maltin: Leonard Maltin yes.

There was a flurry of Murmuring at one.

Eric: Wow, The Lenard Maltin here?

Trever: This is the coolest thing since Tacos.

Maltin: Is the Avatar with you?

Aang came up.

Aang: You can call me Aang.

Maltin: I know your true Name Avatar, There's little time for Proper Introductions or Pleasantries, Have either you or Lieutenant Testaburger here sean Barbara Streisand?

Mark: Barbara Streisand? _The _Barbara Streisand?

Maltin: Have you seen her?!

Mark: N-no.

Aang: I don't even know who that is.

Maltin: Thank god then I'm not too late.

Jack: Too late for what?

Maltin then pointed to Dib and Vana.

Maltin: You two! You were on the News report with those other kids, You have to tell me where they are!

Dib and Vana looked at each other.

Vana: You mean Dippers Sister and those other kids?

**Meanwhile.**

Cartman: You know that Pig of yours might very well get stolen by Kyle Mabel!

Kyle: I didn't steal anything!

Cartman: Dipper, Would you mind telling Kyle that I'm not speaking to him until he gives me my Triangle back?

Dipper: Come on…

Suddenly, Strong winds began swirling around them and the Sound of a Helicopter could be heard.

Cartman: What the Heck is that?

A pink Helicopter appeared from the Sky and Landed in front of the Kids, Out stepped a woman with a Black tank top, A pink necklace, Dark blue pants and Brown shoes, Her hair was messy and Dirty Blonde, A pale wide mouth with Lipstick and a Large nose and Doublechin.

Barbara Streisand: Who is the Little boy I saw on the News a week ago?

The kids all pointed at Kyle.

Streisand: Hello little boy, Do you know who I am?

Kyle: No.

Streisand: Oh, I bet you do

_I'm going-!_

The kids covered their ears!

Mabel: Ah! Stop it!

Streisand: _Where there's lucky clovers in the-_

Dipper: SHUT UP IT SUCKS!

Streisand nashed her teeth Angrily.

Streisand: I'm Barbara Streisand!

Stan: So?

Streisand: So?! I'm a very famous and very important individual.

Stan: Like John Elway important?

Streisand: What?

Stan: Do you know John Elway?

Streisand: No.

Mabel: So you're really famous and you don't know John Elway.

Streisand: Look that's besides the Point, I understand you found a Triangle around these parts.

Kyle: Yeah.

Streisand: Does it have a symbol of two snakes joined at the Middle.

Kyle: Uh yes.

Streisand: So where is the Triangle of Zinthar now?

Kyle: Triangle of What?

Dipper: So it doesn't make deals?

Streisand: I"m not talking to you! You gay assed Faggit!

Dipper was shocked.

Streisand then grabbed Kyle and held him up by his jacket.

Streisand: Where is the Triangle of Zinthar you little Brat!

Kyle screemed, Just then Officer Barbrady came over.

Barbrady: What seems to be the Problem here?

Streisand dropped Kyle.

Streisand: Problemo? There's no Problemo here Officer, I was just introducing myself to these Charming little kids.

Mabel: No sh wasn't! She was being a total bitch!

Barbrady: Kids shouldn't you be in school?

Dipper: It's Saturday dumbass.

Barbrady: No excuses! No move along!

The kids then walked off.

Streisand: Well?

Barbrady: Well what?

Streisand: You know who I am don't you?

Barbrady: Well you ain't fiona Apple, If you aint Fiona Apple then I don't give a rats ass.

Streisand screamed and marched Angrily away.

Barbrady: Oh what a bitch!

**Meanwhile.**

Leanard Maltin, Along with Mark, Jack, Mac, Dib, Vana, Aang, Katara, Sokka, Brian and Stewie arrived at Kyle's house and talked with Kyle's Father.

Gerald: Look I'm sorry but my son's not here right now, Try Randy's house.

Gerald then closed the door.

Maltin: Damn it! We need to keep looking!

Katara: Okay seriously what is this all about?

Stewie: Yeah why are you so obsessed with Barbara Streisand?

Maltin: If she saw the same news report I did, Those kids are in grave danger.

Sokka: Oh c'mon He's already got like… Three or Four Faction leaders pissed at him, Now some Irrelevant Actress?

Maltin: Barbara Streisand is a Singer not an Actress and if any of you were her where would you be?

Brian: Tom's Rhinoplasty?

Mac: Eating at Friendlies?

Vana: Getting Blockbuster?

Maltin: No! No! Where would she be staying?

Jack: We'll theres word she has a condo around here… Somewhere in the Mountains.

**Meanwhile.**

Streisand stared down from the Balcony of her Condo… Tapping her fingers on the railing.

Streisand: He has it Milo… That little bastard has the Triangle.

The man behind her walked up.

Milo: Are you certain Ma'am?

Streisand: I'm sure, He knew about the Symbol of crulock!

Milo: Then why don't we go get it.

Streisand: One of his Friends is the kid who defeated Scratch Ironclaw, His uncles a freedom watch Lieutenant, I can't have them on my back, Not when I'm this close, Everything must be handled very carefully.

She went to a bookcase and pulled a book back, Pressed a red button and the bookshelf turned around to reveal a Podium with another Triangle on it.

Streisand: How long has it bean Milo? Thirty Forty? For so long I have waited to find the other Triangle, And now I am so close, The faction leaders can slaughter and blast each other for all I care, the dawn of Zinthar is close at hand! HA HA HA HA HA HA!

**Meanwhile.**

That Night, Kyle was asleep in his bed Unaware of the sound of a blowtorch cutting a hole through his ceiling, A rope dropped down to the floor, Cartman slipped down the rope, Dressed all in black and a black mask, He observed the room and saw the Triangle on Kyle's dresser Quietly he crept towards it and was about to Grab it when the door opened and Ike came in.

Ike: Kokershane!

Cartman was startled and knocked over A picture of Kyle and his Elephant! Kyle woke up.

Kyle: Cartman?

Cartman took his mask off.

Cartman: Oh great you happy Ike you scared the crap out of me!

Kyle: What the hell are you even doing?

Cartman: I'm trying to my triang- Wait a minute I'm not talking to you, Ike would you tell Kyle I want my triangle back?

Ike: Totalbed.

Kyle: It's my triangle!

Ike: Coccomutter.

Cartman: Well you can tell Kyle that he's a dirty goddamn son of a bitch!

Kyle: Alright! Alright!

Kyle got out of bed and handed Cartman the triangle.

Kyle: If it means that much to you take it!

Cartman: Huh?

Kyle: If it will get you out of my Room, Then take the damn thing!

Cartman was surprised, then he smiled and laughed!

Cartman: Ah sweet I got the Triangle!

And he left Kyle's room laughing!

Cartman: _I got the Triangle I got the Triangle!_

He walked right past Sheila and ran out the Door.

Sheila: Kyle why was one of your friends breaking in?

Kyle: Don't ask mom.

**Meanwhile.**

Appa soured through the air, Carrying Mark and the others as they listened to Maltins rambling.

Maltin: Are any of you sure Barbara Streisand has a condo up here?

Mac: It was just a rumor.

Sokka: Yeah lots of big celebrities have mountain Condos.

Maltin: Then we got to keep looking.

Suddenly Appa descended to Earth and Landed on the Ground.

Maltin: What the? Why Aren't we-?!

Mark: I told Aang to land us! And we won't ascend again until you tell us what this is all about!

Maltin: Haven't any of you wondered about the Insanity Barbara Streisand Exhibits?

The Group looked at each other and thought.

Katara: Not really, Although My Gran Gran told me she was a bitch-

Maltin: More than a Bitch Child! She's a calculating Self Centered egotistical bitch! She was born in a small town, Her mother was a Jackal and her Father was an insurance salesman.

Brian: What you mean like… Satan?

Maltin: When she was five, She knew she wanted to be a famous singer, But By 12, The First Stage of the Heroes v Disney vs Non Disney Villains war broke out and it inspired her to be a Villain and Rule the Universe, She original tried to claim the Chaos Emeralds, But than learned of a Equally Powerful Diamond, The Diamond of Pentas.

Aang: The Diamond of Pentas?

Vana: I thought that was a myth.

Maltin: No It's real, the Keepers of Pentas learned of this Insane Girls wish! The diamond was split up and Buried at Opposite ends of the world, But then during the Shooting of My fair lady, Barbara Steisand found one of the Triangles!

Dib: And the other Triangle is the one that Kyle kid has?

Maltin: Yes, If Babs gets a hold of that Other Triangle she will fulfill her goals and become a being far more Dangerous than the Faction leaders will ever be, Mecha-Streisand!

The group collectively gasped Stupidly.

Mac: Mecha… Streisand.

Stewie: What does that evan mean?

Aang: I don't know but it sounds worse than the Fire Nation, The Horned King or Jargafar themselves.

Mark: Then we need to get to Kyle.

Katara: Before Streisand does.

**Meanwhile.**

The kids were once again at the Bus stop, Listening to Cartman's Bragging.

Cartman: Hmm… I wonder what I should do with My Triangle? Now that it is, My Triangle?

Kyle: I gave it to you so you would shut up!

Suddenly a Giant Metal cage Dropped on them and was picked up by the same Pink Helicopter from yesterday!

Mabel: What the Hell!?

Milo: I have the Targets Madam.

Streisand: Bring them back here.

The Copter flew away with the Kids Screaming in Horror.

**Later.**

The Kids were Chained to a Wall in Streisands Closet, Or In Cartmans case tied to a Torture Device.

Streisand: You have done well Milo, Soon the Triangle will be mine, And I will be the Biggest, Most Famous, Most Powerful being in all the Lands!

Cartman: Let me go! Please!

Stan: Yeah let us go!

Streisand: You fools have no Idea of the Powers your Messing with, I'll teach you to meddle with my Triangle!

She then pulled on a lever, And the Ropes holding Cartman began to Pull at opposite ends.

Cartman: Agh! It's not my Triangle! It's Kyle's!

Kyle: Hey! Don't pass it back on me Fat ass!

Streisand: Where is the Triangle of Zinthar!

Cartman: I don't remember!

Streisand: Maybe this will help jog your memory.

Mabel: No don't!

Streisand: _This is please!_

_No an old!_

Cartman Screamed!

Streisand: Now do you Remember?

Cartman: Agh, Damn Your Black heart Barbara Streisand!

Dipper: Let us go Please!

Streisand: Alright! You asked for it!

She began to sing again!

Streisand: _I'm gonna tell you now!_

Kids: NOOOOOO!

**Meanwhile.**

Aang: I don't know Maybe Barbara Streisand doesn't have a place here after all.

Maltin: Damn, It looks like we'll have to go to Plan B.

Katara: There's a plan B?

Stewie: Why the Deuce have we been flying around up here for?!

Maltin: Who among you have heard of the Band known as the Cure?

Jack: Oh common! The Cure is involved with this Bullshit?!

Maltin: No just the Lead singer.

Suddenly Maltin began to clutch his head and let out Pained groans.

Maltin: OH! OH!

Brain: Mr Maltin are you okay?

Maltin: It's Her… She's close… I can feel it… feel it yes I feel it I can sense her Evil…

Vana: Your Psychic?

Maltin: Shut up I can feel her! Yes… Her Evilness… Oh the Evilness… She has them… She has them… The Children… She has them… She has the Children! There in Trouble!

Mark: What? Dipper? Mabel? No!

Aang: Appa! YIP YIP!

Appa Roared and flew onward.

Maltin: Keep flying this way! Hurry!

**Meanwhile.**

Streisand: _Happiness with you is like Heaven!_

The Kids Screamed!

Cartman: Okay! Okay! I'll tell you where the triangle is! It's inside my Shoe!

Milo removed Cartman's shoe and retrieved the Triangle, giving it to Streisand.

Streisand: Finally! The Triangle is mine! After years upon years of waiting! I finally have the Triangle of Zinthar!

He picked up her Triangle and Joined the two together.

Streisand: Now the Diamond of Pantheos is complete!

The Diamond began spinning around in midair and Sparks flew from it, Streisand began speaking in Japanese as this Happened, It then Erupted in Beams of light! Shooting in All directions, One soon hit her and Streisand began to grow Taller, Her shape becoming more Metallic and Dinosaur-like as she grew.

The Roof of her Condo burst open with her as she became a Giant Metallic Godzilla like Beast Her Armor with White and Grey, Her dark Blonde hair still remained around her head and she roared to the Heavens as she Stomped over the Mountains towards town.

Dipper: What the Hell did we just see?

**Meanwhile.**

In Town Wendy and her Friends were walking along giggling and Chattering Amongst themselves.

Bebe: And than, I said to Chloe, "You think she's got no class? Girl you got no Class."

Red: Wow, Talk about Burn.

Annie: I don't even know what we're talking about.

Wendy: Hmm, Makes me wonder where Stan, Dipper and Mabel have bean.

Suddenly a shadow swept over them and a Great roar was heard, The four Girls looked up to See Mecha Streisand descend upon the Town.

Wendy: Jesus Christ what is that?!

Mecha Streisand began stomping on Buildings picking up and Throwing away Cars and Roaring.

_**Bar-bura, Bar-bura,**_

_**kirai no hito.**_

_**Bar-bura, Bar-bura,**_

_**anata no hi.**_

From her Office, Mayor McDaniels starred in Absolute Horror.

Aide: Uh, Mayor Barbara Streisand is-

Mayor McDaniels: I noticed! Get the Watch!

The aide left to obey.

Mayor McDaniels: We'll get you Barbara Streisand you bitch, And to think I actually watched your HBO special.

**Meanwhile.**

Lenard maltin and the Others arrived at the Destroyed Condo.

Mark: Dipper! Mabel!

Dipper and Mabel: Uncle Mark!

Before any of them could reach the kids, Milo appeared in front of them.

Milo: My mistress cannot be stopped!

Jack drew his sword and Sliced the Butler down.

Maltin: Oh no! She's already joined the Triangles!

Cartman: Yes! She stole my Triangle!

Stan: Get us down from here!

Mark and Sokka drew their blades and cut the Kids down one by one.

Mark: Are you kids alright.

Dipper: Yeah, We're fine… Mostly.

Maltin: We've got to go after Streisand, One of you must call Robert Smith of the cure, This is his Number.

Stan: Robert smith? Cool!

Vana took the phone and Dialed Robert Smith's number as the group got on Appa.

Robert Smith: _Hello?_

Vana: Hello are you Robert Smith?

Robert Smith: _That's me._

Vana: EEE! Uh, Ahem I mean good Good, That's good, Uh Lenard Maltin told me to call you.

Robert Smith: _Why? Did Barbara Streisand find the other Triangle._

Vana: … Uh… Yeah.

**Meanwhile.**

Back in town, The Freedom watch mobilized against Mecha-Streisand, Their ground forces had Prepared Cannons and Rocket launchers and Aimed them at Streisand.

Tiara: Alright boys! Give her Everything you got!

The Cannons Fired but they Barely scratched her, Than several green Bi-planes zoomed in towards Streisand followed by Jimbo and Ned in a Helicopter they Fired Proton torpedoes and Bullets at Streisand but they did little Damage either, Jimbo and Ned circled Streisand's head.

Jimbo: Get her around the side Ned! I can't get a shot in from here!

Ned Piloted the Copter towards Streisand and came directly between her eyes!

Ned: AHHH! AHHHH! I'm scared!

Jimbo fired a Bazooka at Streisand and "Surprise Surprise!" No damage!

_**Bar-bura, Bar-bura,**_

_**Ugoina chichi da.**_

Streisand knocked the Helicopter Out of the Sky and it fell to Earth.

Tiara: Damn it! Everything we have has no effect!

Larry: What do we do?!

Suddenly, Sheila came right up to Streisand out of Nowhere.

Sheila: Oh my God It is you! Oh I am such a huge fan Mrs Streisand! I never thought I'd live to see you in person!

Streisand noticed.

Sheila: I hate to ask this, But could I have an Autograph my Sister would die!

Randy: Are you insane! She's destroying our town!

Sheila: Well still-

Streisand suddenly punted Sheila away and sent her flying off screen.

Sheila: AAHHHHH! (Crash!) Ow…

Soon, Dipper and the other arrived on Appa.

Maltin: Dear god We must stop her!

Vana: But how?!

Jack: Wait Hold on a sec!

Jack pulled his phone out.

Jack: Monkey team! Come in! This is Sergeant Jack! Where are you?!

Chiro: _We're on our way just hold Streisand till we're there!_

**Meanwhile.**

Chiro, Sparkx, Nova, Otto, Gibson and Antauri Ascended up the Elevators to their cockpits, The Super Robot began to power up as they reached them and Strapped in.

Nova: Foot Crusher Cruiser six! GO!

Otto: Foot Crusher Cruiser Five GO!

Gibson: Fist Rocket four! GO!

Sparkx: Fist Rocket Three! GO!

Antauri: Brain Scrambler Pilot Two! GO!

Chiro: Torso Tank Driver one! GO!

As they said this, The lift off Pad began to Light up!

Chiro: Super!

Sparx: Robot!

Antauri: Monkey!

Nova: Team!

Gibson: Hyper!

Otto: Force!

SRMTHF: GO!

The feet clamps unlock and the Super Robot Advanced Forward to face Barbara Streisand!

Antauri: Target Directly ahead!

The robot Stopped in front of Streisand just as She was Ravaging the town.

_**Super Robot!**_

_**Super Robot!**_

Chiro: Barbara Streisand, You are charged with Wanton destruction and being A "total Bitch." Please don't ask why I said that it was in the Script, Surrender now!

Streisand roared and Clanked her claws together.

Chiro: Very well, Mrs Streisand you asked for it!

_**Super Robot Monkey Team Hyper force GO!**_

_**Nuga nana Nini, They oh Shaga go Trow.**_

_**Super Robot Monkey team HyperForce GO!**_

_**No Ta! No Sa No Fu!**_

Randy: Uh… Are you sure those are the Lyrics?

The two Giant Anontoms engage in Combat! Streisand whipped her tail at the Robots Feet, Temporarily knocking it to the Ground, It got back up and Punched her, She recomposed herself and Rammed into the Robot, But it caught her and Pushed back against her weight! Shoving her off him, Streisand grabbed a building and threw it at the Robot, The Robot Backhanded it to pieces, Debris flew everywhere

Chef: Look out Everybody!

The Group scattered about to avoid the Rubble, Katara wasn't quick enough and was struck on the head with a stray brick, Knocking her Unconscious.

Sokka: Katara!

Streisand kicked the Robot in his Groin and Punched him, Sending it to one knee.

Antauri: Chiro What are your orders?

Chiro: Okay Okay! Nova contact all Available officers, Tell them to-! Wait what is that?

Out of the Blue A burst of Light came out, Aang had suddenly gone into the Avatar state and his sights were set on Streisand.

Dib: He's pissed.

_**Avatar! Avatar!**_

_**Tae kuin New Om Ne Fi!**_

_**Avatar! Avatar!**_

Sharon: Is that really Necessary?

Aang conjured a Strong storm of wind a hurled it at Mecha-Streisand, Disrupting her balance, He than used the wind to lift debris which he chucked at her with, Streisand managed to absorb the Blows and Managed to Grab at Aang, Chucking him at the Super Robot as it got back up, The Impact surprisingly caught it off guard and sent both crashing to the Ground… Somehow, With a boy his size managing to knock down God knows how many tons of Metal, But Hey anythings possible if you're the Avatar Right? RIGHT?!

Dib: I think the Narrator suffered a mental Breakdown just now.

**NO I DID NO**\- Oh wait, where was I oh yes, Just at that Moment, Who should Arrive but none other than… Robert Smith of the Cure!

Robert Smith: Am I too late?

Maltin: Robert! Wish you could have come sooner.

Stan: Dude!

Vana: Oh my god… It's HIM!

Mabel: Dear god Yes!

Mac: Robert Smith!

Robert Smith: Yup, That's me, I'll handle Streisand.

Brian: You can Try Mr Smith, But that Bitch just kicked our Super Robot and the Avatars Asses.

Robert Smith: I have to try, I can't let Barbara Streisand destroy the world.

He then handed a Walkie Talkie to Dipper and Mabel.

Robert Smith: You hold this, You can help me fight her.

Dipper: You fight her? HOW?!

Robert Smith: Just watch me.

Robert Smith then walked over to a clearing out of town and Began to Spin around like Wonder Woman, He then began to Transform into something Resembling a Moth.

_**Robert Smith, Robert Smith!**_

_**Nagashi Rab bi Robert Smith!**_

Robert Smith rose up Behind Streisand, Catching her by surprise with a Super sonic Scream that Shattered Windows! Streisand Retaliated with a Roar that Did the same thing and made Robert Smith cover his Ears, On the Ground Jack just came back with Aang.

Sokka: Aang!

Aang: Robert Smith… Tell him Streisand's weak point is the Nose.

Dipper: Robert Smith! Hit her in the Nose!

Robert Smith received this and Aimed his Fist at Streisand who Jabbed at him with a Pylon, Robert Smith's fist Shot out at her Nose and knocked the Diamond of Pantheos out, It landed right next to Stan's feet somehow.

Stan: The Diamond of Pantheos! She must be Powerless now!

Dipper: Quickly Robert Smith! She's powerless!

Flapping his Wings and Screeching, Robert Smith Punched Streisand and Grabbed her Tail!

_**Robert Smith! Robert Smith!**_

Randy pulled out a Gun and Shot the Chinese Singer.

Randy: God he was getting annoying!

Robert Smith Spun Streisand around by her Tail and Launched her Straight into the Air, She than Ended up in outer Space!

By that Time the Super Robot had Recovered and was back on his feet.

Chiro: This is it team, ARM ROCKETS FIRE!

The Robot Spread his Arms and Fired Several Missiles at Streisand they zoomed into Space and Blew her to Pieces!

Down below, The Town Cheered.

Dipper: We did it!

Mabel: No more Barbara Streisand!

Dib: All thanks to Robert Smith!

Katara Slowly woke up in Jack's lap.

Katara: Uh… What happened?

Sokka: Robert Smith Happened.

Robert Smith then came over to the Group.

Robert Smith: Thanks for the Help folks, Can I have My Walkie Talkie now?

Cartman Suddenly snatched it From Dipper.

Cartman: No way, You gave it to us It's mine now!

Dipper: Hey!

Robert Smith: Alright then, I'll Roshambo you for it, Ready?

Cartman: What?

Robert Smith then Kicked Cartman in the Balls and he fell down Clutching them.

Cartman: AH!

Pip: Ha! Serves you right Fat ass!

Robert Smith than Picked up his Walkie and walked off over the Mountains and Into the Sunset.

Dipper: Goodbye Robert Smith! Thanks for your Help!

Dib: Visit us Again!

Mabel: Disintegration is the Best Album Ever!

Vana: CALL ME!

**Later.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Cartman and Chiro were at Kyle's house.

Kenny: (So what do we do with the Two Triangles?)

Dipper: We get rid of them, No one should have the Kind of Power Barbara Streisand wanted.

He then took the Triangles and threw them in the Trash.

Chiro: Thank god for that, Who knows if the Villain Factions find out about them.

Mabel: When did you start Hanging out with us?

Chiro: What? I'm not allowed to Hang with other kids?

Dipper: I barely even know you.

Chiro: I just saved your Lives!

They walked outside as they Argued.

Kyle: You know, I've learned something today, I've learned that Most people who want Power, Do whatever they need to get and Most of the Time, End up dead.

Dipper: Kinda blunt and Obvious.

Cartman: Yeah, And I learned something too, Robert Smith kicks ass!

Mabel: You better believe it.

Suddenly a great Rumbling was heard that shook the Earth.

Kenny: (What the Crap was that?)

Stan: Oh my God Look!

From behind Kyle's House, Stomped a Giant Ike!

Kyle: Oh my God Ike!

Dipper chuckled.

Dipper: Maybe, I shouldn't have just dumped it in the Trash…

Chiro: You think?!

**Meanwhile.**

Grimhilde smirked triumphantly at the Carcothacus in front of her, then turned her Attention to Richard the Warlock and Tzekel-Khan.

Grimhilde: You have done well, My servants, And what of the Means to open it?

Tzekel-Khan: Ah, Those should be along any moment now.

From behind the Door, Two large Figures bumbled in, Both Dinosaurs like, But one was Larger was Female and wore Two shades of Blue and the Other was Shorter, Male and Orange.

Rhoga: Uh your Majesty, We have Retrieved the Artifact as you wished.

She then elbowed Her Companion Thudd.

Thudd: Huh? Oh yeah, Here you go!

Thudd than Handed a Dark glowing Red Gem to the Evil Queen.

Grimhilde: Ah yes… And now.

Grimhilde Knelt down and Placed the Gem at the Feet of the Carcothacus, Red veins crept up it and to a Large circular lock which Spun around it's Combination before continuing up to the Head which exploded in Red light and Opened!

Out of the Tomb a large Figure emerged It's armor Retracting into itself to Reveal a Man.

Grimhilde: Ah Excellent, Welcome to my Alliance… Ogthar.

**Oh My… A new Ally for Grimhilde? My god… What about the Other Villains Factions? What have their Moves bean?**

**Find out in Tie in Adventures for the Crossover Legends universe and Future Installments In Crossover Legends Season 2!**

**Until Next time!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Episode 22.**

**Shadows Cannot Hide.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

A week had passed since Barbara Streisand's Attack and Crossover town was still recovering, Buildings were being Rebuilt, Homes were being fixed and People had been sheltered as the Restoration took place.

Aang and Katara had been put in a Hospital Following their Injuries from Streisand's Attack, Despite the Former's Injuries not being as Critical as Aang's, But still she was put there all the same, Probably to keep him Company.

Dipper and Mabel meanwhile were carrying on like Nothing had happened Especially after Getting the Diamond of Zinthar out of Ike, Which Randy buried in an Unknown location, With some odd Riddle's but that's another story for Another Day.

Once again the Twins were waiting for the Bus to come, But this time they were with Wendy, Bebe, Red and A girl Named Heidi Turner, Instead of Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny.

Red: So like, Have they managed to Contact the Royal Council yet?

Bebe: Why are you asking me? Their uncle's the Lieutenant.

Wendy: Please don't drag us into this.

Red: Well?

Dipper: How am I supposed to know? I haven't exactly been active in Freedom watch Activity since I came here.

Red: So they still aren't doing anything.

Wendy: Honestly they've been put under pressure From the other Villain Factions, What do you expect them to do?

Red: Maybe giving us a goddamn Hand would be nice.

Heidi: Why are you even concerned about this?

Red: The Thousand Eye horde has taken back a piece of Mossflower.

The other kids were shocked.

Bebe: What?

Wendy: That's impossible! No Vermin Horde's attempted to get a foothold there for 200 years.

Dipper: Things must be really getting bad outside.

Later at School, Dipper sat with the other Boys at lunch.

Cartman: And then I said, "Bad Mr Kitty! Bad!" And smacked him over the head, and when he still wouldn't go I was all "NO KITTY THAT"S A BAD-"

Kyle: Okay we get you'r cruel to your Cat! Now shut up!

Cartman: I'm not cruel, I'm just throwing my dominance.

Stan: That actually sounds like Cruelty, Cartman.

Dipper wasn't listening, He had been ignoring the Cartman arguing with the others since he sat down, Then something suddenly caught his eye, Something that… Almost looked like a shadow across the floor, It darted away as Dipper stared.

Dipper: Hey did any of you see that?

The boys looked at him.

Stan: Saw what?

Dipper: Uh… Nothing.

**Meanwhile.**

Jargafar seethed on his throne, As he cursed to himself.

Lord Jargafar: Curse that Randy Marsh! I almost forgot how much of a bother he could be, And Damn you Wold you incompetent Bitch! Only Three weeks ago she failed to get those Brats!

?: Perhaps then you should have stayed to your Threat.

Jargafar looked back at the tall figure in the Darkness, And scowled through his shadow covered face.

Jargafar: Oh Shut up You! I don't tell you how to Carry out your tasks so don't tell me how to do things!

?: Oh but of course my Lord, I would never dare or dream of such, although, I still find myself questioning why not simply Attack Crossover town and seize the boy yourself?

Lord Jargafar: We can't enter Crossover town, Not with that underground Shield generator surrounding it, It prevents me from entering the town personally Besides we're currently trying to conquer the world if you didn't notice, So gathering our Full forces would leave us Pretty exposed.

The figure scoffed.

?: Then why not take out the Generator?

Lord Jargafar: We don't know where it is!

Jarfafar got up and raised a Hand, From the Ground a Black stone Well rose from the Ground in front of him.

Lord Jargafar: But now that you mention it, Perhaps there is a way to find out, And get the Boy at the same time.

He then began to summon dark Energies from the Well.

Lord Jargafar: And if he doesn't well… No loss either way. Hm,Hm,Hm,Hm.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark: _Do do do- My mopping sucks - De De De - I'm inconsistent- A da da da da-_

Mark was in the Guest room of his Brothers house reading some crappy fanfiction (Not mine.) When suddenly his phone rang and he had to take it.

Mark: Hello?

_Jack: Mark! You might wanna get down here!_

Mark: Down here?

Mark then looked to the Sky and saw it fizzle out a little.

Mark: Uh oh…

**Later.**

Mark drove his Car to the Camp, He got out and hurried over to a Out house, He put his hand on the door and did a neural scan of his hand, The door was an Elevator he entered and descended down to an Underground cavern, Where Jack, Badger, Minnie Mouse and several others were with a large Generator or Something.

Mark: What's going on.

Jack: The main generator's fluctuating.

Mark: I noticed.

Badger: This Generator was built to Raise an Invisible shield around the land, To keep us safe from Jargafar's forces.

Minnie: Four other Generators are stationed at Four ends of the Valley, All controlled by this Main Generator, If this one was deactivated, The shield would collapse.

Mark: I remember all that, What happened to the Main on.

Gibson poked his head out.

Gibson: Oh nothing much just a few minor Dents and bangs, And maybe a couple signs of wear.

Badger: Or perhaps Erosion from Streisand's Attack.

Gibson: Yes, I suppose that would be a more Suficient Theory.

Otto: Yeah, We're gonna have to put Emergency Activation to the other Generators.

Badger: Hmm, I'll get teams on that right away.

And he trundled off.

Mark: Anything I could do?

Minnie: Nothing really just maybe go turn on the East Generator.

Mark: I really have to go all the way to the other side?

Minnie: Yeah, Pretty much, Before you go I'd like to ask, How are Dipper and Mabel doing?

Mark: Them, Fine really The whole ordeal with Streisand didn't affect them that much, Though I Dipper stills seems a little Jumpy about it.

Minnie: He had to get a triangle out of a Robot Dinosaur and a Baby what did you expect.

Mark: Honestly, he's been through a lot slightly worse than that, Surviving a Crashed ship, Got into a fight with Corrupt law enforcement, Taken by an Angry Panda Spirit, Forced to work with Evil greek gods…

Minnie: And killed off one of Jargafars top men.

Jack: Not to mention the incidents with that Volcano, Holli would and Ben Sykes.

Mark: ...Yeah them too, Wait what Volcano?

**Meanwhile.**

The final bell sounded as School came to an End, Children unpacked their lockers and made their way to the Buses Dipper was just about to Go outside when he heard a Voice.

**?: **_Boy…_

Dipper looked back… Nothing was there, he shrugged and made his way to the Bus.

He took his seat next to Mabel and got out the Assigned Homework, He usually did his work on the Bus, It gave him extra time to do his own things at home.

As he got out his Geometry, He suddenly heard a whisper, He turned to the Kid Next to him, An African American named Token Black.

Dipper: I'm sorry did you say something?

Token: No.

The Whisper came again, Dipper looked across the Bus, He listened to the Other kids, bUt he heard nothing like the Whisper, Than-

?: NA!

Dipper suddenly tumbled out of his seat in fright, His school bag spilling everywhere, Causing the bus to stop suddenly.

Mrs Crabtree: BACK IN YOUR SEAT!

Dipper hurriedly gathered his belongings, Still unable to get the Image out of his head.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark, Jack, Nova, Sparx and Larry the Lynx made their way through the Woods on the other side of town, They entered a hole and were now traveling through a Tunnel leading to the East Generator.

Sparx: Phew, No one's bean down here for a while, Obviously.

Larry: Who would blame them, Having to Travel in a dingy place like this?

Mark: The Generator should be just up ahead, We shouldn't be long.

Nova: right just a Routine check up.

Nova then noticed something in the Shadows behind them, She blinked and it was gone.

Jack: Nova? What's wrong?

Nova: Wha- Oh nothing.

The group soon arrived at the East Generator.

Mark: Alright we're here, We'll just put it through a Diagnosis then call Minnie, Nova check the Power couplings, Larry you and Sparx stand guard, Jack and I will look it over for any outside Damage.

Jack: Hmm, No sign of broken wires… A few Dents and Scratches, We'll have to see Otto about those.

Mark removed the cover to the Exhaust port.

Mark: Exhaust port Seams in good order.

Just then a Yelp was heard in the Opposite direction they came and Larry came stumbling back.

Jack: Larry?

Sparx: What happened?

Larry: T-T-There's someone in the Tunnel!

The others looked and saw a figure in a Black robe standing there, then darting off as soon as it laid Eyes on them!

Mark: Hey! You!

Mark, Jack and Nova raced after the figure all the way to the Entrance, They reached the outside and Found no Trace of him.

Jack: Who was that?

**Meanwhile.**

That afternoon Dipper sat in his Room, Which he now shared with Wendy and Mabel, Still trying to come to terms with what he had been seeing.

Dipper: Probably just seeing things, Yes that's it, I'm just seeing things… Nothing to worry about… Probably stress from the past 5 months…

Dipper suddenly felt something behind, He whirled around and saw nothing, He turned around again and Found a Pair of Malicious Red eyes staring at him through the Window, He yelled out and Tumbled out of his Chair, Wendy and Mabel came hurting in at once and found him sprawled on the floor.

Mabel: Dipper!

They hurried to his side and helped him up as he Struggled for Breath.

Wendy: Dipper are you alright?!

Dipper: I-I-I-I… I saw something… In the Window!

Wendy and Mabel looked and saw nothing.

Mabel: We don't see anything.

Dipper: There were… There were Eyes… Red Eyes, Staring right at me!

Wendy: What? Are you serious?

Dipper: Yes I! ...Maybe.

Mabel: Are you succumbing to Stress Dipper? More so than usual?

Dipper: No! I'm fine…

Wendy: You don't seem fine.

Just then Harold and Valorie came in.

Harold: What Happened?

Mabel: Dippers Starting to lose it.

**Later.**

Dr Marshall: So you're saying you saw Red eyes in your Window and have been seeing shadows in the Corners of your Eyes?

Dipper lay on the longe as the Therapist observed him.

Dipper: I swear I'm not crazy, I've been glancing at shadows all day, It's like they're Following me.

Dr Marshall: Okay and how long has this gone on?

Dipper: The Whole Day.

Dr Marshall wrote a few things down, Than looked back at Dipper.

Dr Marshall: Well Mason It seems you may be under stress, Have you had any… Incidents lately?

Dipper: What do you mean?

Dr Marshall: You know… Incidents… Like uh… Traumatic Experiences?

Dipper didn't say anything, His mind was currently Remembering all the Crazy things he had Gone through During Gravity Falls, Piedmont, His Journey to Caer Daythl, Later to Crossover town and his Misadventures with Aliens, Shelly Marsh, Mutant Clones, Ben Sykes, Holli Would and Barbara Streisand.

Dipper: You have no Fucking Idea.

And he got up and Walked out.

**Later.**

As Dipper left the Office he headed down the Street to god knows where, He still couldn't shake the Thoughts out of his Head, Slowly as if all around him Voices began whispering in his Head.

?: _Where are you now…_

?: _Young Brat._

?: _You Left me…_

?: _Couldn't Save them…_

?: _Murderer…_

?: _You should Die…_

?: _I see you…_

?: A penny for your thoughts.

Dipper suddenly jumped, He turned around and faced a Large Man, In a Blackish red robe, His head Covered by a Large hood, He looked like a Sorcerer.

?: You seem Troubled, Not followed by Anyone are you?

Dipper Backed slowly.

?: Easy boy Easy, I didn't mean myself.

Dipper: Stay back!

Dipper Raised his Fists.

?: Please I mean you know Harm, I just happened to Notice your Distress.

Dipper: Are you behind it?

?: No, But I may know what's causing it.

Dipper: You… You do?

?: Yes, Perhaps I can help.

**Meanwhile.**

At the Testaburger residence, Mark, Jack and Larry came in and told everyone there about the Figure.

Harold: A figure? In the Tunnel?

Larry: A big one, It looked like it was following us!

Jack: We lost it on the Surface though.

Valorie: Have you told Badger or the Mayor?

Mark: Sparx and Nova have already gone to tell them, We Er, I just wanted to come home and Make sure you were all safe… Where's Dipper?

Harold: Oh uh We left him with Dr Marshall.

Jack: Why?

Harold: Apparently he's been seeing things, Most likely in his head.

Mark: Where is he now?

Harold: He should be there-

Suddenly Mable and Wendy came into the Room.

Wendy: Mom, Dad, Mabel and I called Dr Marshall about Dipper and he said he left.

Mark's Eyes widened.

Mark: By himself?!

Harold: Hey, Hey Easy Mark, It's a Three minute Drive from here to Marshall's he should be… Wait he should have bean-

At that Moment, Randy Burst into the Room.

Randy: Guys! Guys! We got Trouble!

Harold: Oh fuck.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper and the Hooded Man walked down and Alleyway together, The Man looked about to see if they were alone.

Dipper: Why bring me Back here? My house is like Five yards away from here.

?: It was too risky, Whatever has been troubling you is Probably embedded there.

DIpper: You said you know what it was.

?: I do, And if I do you may be in great danger.

Dipper: Why are you helping me?

?: Because I was there.

**Flashback.**

_?: I watched your battle with The Dark lords forces and I saw your Battle with Scratch Ironclaw, Do you remember what you said as you held the Emerald?_

**Flashback Stops.**

Dipper: … "Chaos… Control?"

?: Yes, Why did you say that?

Dipper: I don't know, I just thought It would help us somehow… I was under Pressure at the Time.

**Flashback Resumes.**

_?: Anyway I witnessed the way you slowed down time Around you dn Ironclaw, Allowing your friends enough time to catch up and help you, I thought it a fascinating display of Power you showed, I then decided to follow you, ANd I've been watching you ever since._

**Flashback ends.**

Dipper: You've been watching me? Then was it you who caused that Brick pile and Jumbo Jet to Fall on Scratch?

?: Oh no I actually have no Idea where that all came from.

Dipper: Okay, So why are you so Interested in me?

They continued to talk as they walked Down the Alleyway.

?: Because of your Ability to use Chaos is most… Intriguing, Few have been able to use the Emeralds as you have.

Dipper: And your point.

?: There is great potential in you my Boy, You have only Scratched the surface of your Power, There's much you've yet to learn.

Dipper Blinked.

?: But of course I'm getting off topic, What matters now is Repelling Jargafar-

Dipper: What? Jargafar? How do you know it's Jargafar?

They suddenly stopped walking, Having reached the Other side of the Alleyway.

?: I have seen the signs-

Dipper: And what are these things you keep talking about? Are… Are you Jargafar?

?: I am not Jargafar.

Dipper: Then who are you?

The Stranger then pulled back his hood, Revealing his Face, He had Greyish Black hair, and Goatee of the Same Color.

?: Ult Al Cur, I am a Mage.

**Meanwhile.**

At the Hospital, Dib, Vana, Mac and Sokka were visiting the Bed ridden Aang and Katara.

Katara: So I get Aang having to stay here, But why me?

Dib: You were hit on the head, I'm surprised you're not dead by now.

Suddenly Jack burst into the Room.

Jack: Guys C'mon we gotta save Dipper!

Vana: Again?

Dib: Oh my God We're coming!

And they all rushed out of the Room.

Aang: Hey what about us?

**Meanwhile.**

Jargafar: Damn, I was just starting to Pshycologacly torture the boy to.

?: Seems you didn't think this through enough Oh Master.

Jargafar: You try Anticipating the arrival of a Long forgotten Lineage shows up out of the Blue, No matter I'll just skip right to Possessing the little Brat.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper and Ult Al Cur had found a small cave in the Middle of the woods outside of Town, There they sat Continued this Conversation.

Dipper: So what's been haunting me? You keep saying you know what it is.

Ult Al Cur: I do, Lord Jargafar.

Dipper's face went Pale.

Ult Al Cur: His Shadow has been cast upon you, I can see it, It lurks in the Background of your Mind, That is why only you can see it, But I can.

Dipper: How can you?

Ult Al Cur: Because I have the power to look into minds.

Dipper: You mean like Telepathy?

Ult Al Cur: Almost, My power is somewhat like Telepathy but it is something more, I can also look into the Soul of others, And tell me of what is Possessed or not.

Dipper: ...Possessed?

Ult Al Cur: My boy, When I said Jargafars Shadow was upon you, I meant there is a Dark spirit Conjured by Jargafar to take over your mind,In order to do his Bidding.

Dipper just sat there stupefied, But he quickly shock out of it.

Dipper: How can this help me?

Ult Al Cur: I know an Incantation that can Siphon the Shadow out of your Head so we can destroy it, It is a delicate art thou, Any interruption and it could all go wrong.

Dipper then laid down on his Back.

Ult AL Cur: Now relax, close your eyes and let me do my work.

As Dipper slowly closed his eyes, Ult began to run his hands in a swirling motion around his head and Chant unknown things into his head.

Ult Al Cur: _Amen to no.._

_Carmen to yo…_

_Hin sa toyusa_

_Portonus sin ti baza._

**Outside.**

Mark, Followed By Dib, Vana, Mabel, Wendy, Randy, Mac, Jack, Larry and Sokka trudged through the woods when they suddenly stopped and heard the chanting.

Mark: What's that?

Jack: It's coming from there!

Jack pointed to the Cave.

**Inside.**

Ult Al Cur continued the Ritual as he chanted more Incantations, Unaware that Mark and the others had Peered inside.

Wendy: Who is that?

Ult Al Cur: _Prentus Mana na!_

_Centus prago ta._

_Caranus suntok_

Mark: He has Dipper!

Mark ignited his Blade and charged forward with a war cry, Surprising Ult and Breaking his Concentration! He felt himself dragged to his feet and slammed against a wall, THe other rushing in after, With Mabel and Wendy Quickly coming to Dippers side.

Ult Al Cur: No! NO!

Mark: Get away from my nephew!

Suddenly Dipper's body began to contrast wildly.

Mabel: Dipper?

Wendy: Dipper what's wrong?

Ult Al Cur: You've no Idea what you fools have done.

DIpper suddenly opened his eyes, But they weren't exactly his eyes, But were Crimson Red and Glowing a little.

Mabel: D-Dipper…

Dipper?: Dippers not here…

Dipper's voice sounded raspy as he spoke, He than punched Mabel in the Face and Kicked Wendy's off him and got up, He ran off Towards the Exit, Randy and Sokka tried to stop him but he just skidded right, Under them and Ran outside.

Mark suddenly released Ult and ran towards where Dipper had run out to.

Mark: Dipper! Come back!

Ult Al Cur: That's not the boy…

Mac: What did you do to him?

Ult Al Cur: I was helping him, Saving him from the Shadow, But you fools ruined everything!

Vana: Who are you? And why were you "Helping" Dipper?

Ult Al Cur: I am a Mage, My name is Ult Al Cur.

Jack's eyes widened.

Jack: Al Cur… The ruling family of the Dark nation?!

Jack suddenly drew his sword and nearly marched over to Al Cur Only for Dib and Sokka to hold him back.

Mark: What?

Ult Al Cur: Yes, I am of the Lineage, But that does not matter at this moment, Your Friend is Currently under the Influence of a Shadow cast by the Dark lord himself, What he might use him for next I do not know, I was casting an Incantation to Repel it, But you fools went and ruined it!

Wendy: That still doesn't explain why you were helping him.

Ult Al Cur: Is it not the Nice thing to help those in need?

Jack: If it's from the spawn of a Genocidal beast, I wouldn't even think twice! Mark, We can't' trust him.

Dib: Dude, You're a Fox, People barely trust you either.

Jack: Is that supposed to be Racist boy?!

Mark: Enough!

Mark then turned to Al Cur.

Mark: There is another way to save Dipper right?

Ult Al Cur: The Shadow has taken control of him, The spell I was performing was the only way, But perhaps we can try again.

Wendy: While he's awake?

Ult Al Cur: No, That would kill him, He has to be knocked out first then try again.

Randy: How do we do that?

Mac: Uh I never said any of this before, But I may have brought these.

Mac then produced a Pack of Stun Darts.

Ult AL Cur: That'll work.

**Meanwhile.**

Lord Jargafar: Excellent… My shadow has taken the boy… Now I will learn where the Generators are.

?: And how will you learn that? The boy Probably knows nothing of the Shield Generators.

Lord Jargafar: I can fix that.

After a few Moments, Voices came up from the Cauldron.

_?: … So the Main Generators almost fixed…?_

_?: … Yeah wasn't much…_

The Dark lord Grinned in the shadows.

**Meanwhile.**

In the Caverns of the Main Generator, The watch had just finished up repairs.

Minnie: Well, That should be enough, Well done everyone.

Badger: Still have to worry about this "Stranger" In the West tunnel though, Have we heard from Mark yet?

Otto: Afraid not, I called the Testaburger residence and they said-

?: I was missing.

Everyone jumped and saw Dipper standing there with Red eyes.

Badger: Dipper Pines? Where did? What are you doing here?

DIpper didn't reply.

Minnie: Uh, I don't think we've been introduced, I'm Minnie Mouse, I knew your Parents well, they-

Dipper: Were stupid?

Dipper suddenly pulled out a Gun and Aimed at any one who came near him.

Badger: What in blazes are you doing Boy?!

Dipper: Boy? Sorry there is no-

Suddenly A dart found Dipper's neck and he fell to the Ground.

Minnie: Uh… That was… Nothing.

Mark: Not Exactly.

**Meanwhile.**

Lord Jargafar: What?

**Meanwhile.**

Everyone gathered around while Ult Al Cur chanted his ritual.

Ult Al Cur: _Caranus suntok_

Demato Meso.

Banana Gto

See I sen GOW!

As the Incantation finished a Large black thing blasted out and dispersed into nothing.

Ult Al Cur: The shadow is lifted.

Dipper slowly opened his eyes.

Dipper: Uh… What happened?

Mabel: If I told you you'd be on a Paranormal rant for weeks.

Dipper: Seriously what happened.

Mark: You were overtaken by Jargafars shadow… Without our Help.

Wendy: Yeah, We uh couldn't have gotten out without Mr Al Cur… Who we totally didn't accuse of being a bad guy.

Dipper: You guys interrupted the ritual and got me possessed, didn't you.

Randy: Yeah, Mostly Mark.

Mark knocked him across the head.

Ult Al Cur: Well all that Matters is your safe now Dipper… Safe to be my Apprentice!

Dipper: Yeah, Thanks for… WAIT WHAT?!

Ult Al Cur suddenly grabbed Dipper and held him by his Jacket, Everyone gasped.

Mabel: Oh No!

Minnie: Goodness!

Mark: Dipper!

Jack: I knew it!

Everyone took a step towards Ult, Only for him to thrust out his Palm and fire a blast of Dark magic at them to push them back.

Ult Al Cur: Nobody move! The Boys is mine!

Mark: What do you want with him?

Dipper: Remember that time stop thing I did with the Chaos Emerald?

Mac: Uh… Yeah?

Dipper: He thinks I can control the Chaos Emeralds.

Vana: What? People can't control the Chaos Emeralds.

Ult froze.

Ult: They… They can't?

Vana: No, Chaos Control has been done before by others, Any one that holds a chaos Emerald can use its power, Not control it.

Ult Al Cur looked like his jaw would drop.

Ult AL Cur: So he… Has no connection to them?

While Vana kept Ult talking, Sokka pulled out his Boomerang and threw it, It whirled around the Cavern and Hit Ult in the back of his head, Causing him to Drop Dipper and allowing him to run to the Safety of his Friends.

Ult got up and Rubbed his Head as he did.

Ult Al Cur: We'll meet again Freedom watch and with a puff of Smoke he was gone.

Mark: Are you alright Dipper.

Dipper: I honestly have no Idea what went on today.

**Meanwhile.**

Jargafar seethed in the Shadows.

?: Well that went well.

Lord Jargafar: Shut up! Just get out you fool!

The figure did as he was bid.

Lord Jargafar: Oh well, I guess I'll have to try something else… To bring him to me.

He tapped a button and the Screen showed him a place.

Lord Jargafar: My next conquest….

Gravity falls Oregon.

**To be Continued.**

**Hey guys, Bean a while, Not real proud of this Chapter took a long time to****work on, That happens when your Juggling writing four Fanfiction stories at once, But don't worry there's more on the way, Stay tuned for that, I really want to get to the good stuff, And be sure to check out more chapters for South Park****the Dark time comes, Go God Go (Retelling.) and Watership Down (Combined edition.) See ya real soon. :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Episode 30.**

**Love not Danger.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover legends.**

Mark lay in his bed as he groaned to himself, As he did Jack came into the room and sighed.

Jack: Do I even need to guess?

Mark looked up at Jack and sighed as he sat up straight.

Mark: Keep him safe… That's what I promised… Keep them both safe, I did that by splitting them up so Jargafar couldn't find them both, I thought putting Dipper with me would do it, God what was I thinking, All it's done is get him Arrested by Dictators, Snatch by Spirits, Nearly killed by several other Villains! And Now he was just Possessed by a Shadow like a week ago!

He got up and Slammed a fist against the wall.

Mark: I'm failing her Jack… I'm failing her…

Jack stood up straight.

Jack: You put him in Military Organization, Taught him how to defend himself, And look how far he's come, Kept the Emerald well hidden, Found Aang, Evan saved us all from Hexxus.

Mark: Still let him get reeled in by Al Cur… Which, Actually… I honestly have no Idea if that was good or bad.

Jack: I'd say bad… If only Master Yen Sid was around then, He could have handled it, Or Any other of our Wizards.

Mark: Not the point Jack.

Jack: Sorry.

Mark sighed.

Mark: Maybe I should keep a closer eye on him, Who knows what He'll get into next, I'm surprised Mabel hasn't had this much trouble.

As if on Cue Mabel came into the Room with two different sweaters in her hand.

Mabel: Uncle Mark? Have you seen Dipper around?

Mark shot up straight.

Mark: He's not here?!

Mabel: No, I need him to help decide which sweeter works today, Googly eyes or Glitter Rainbows, I'm thinking-

Mark: WHERE IS HE!?

Mark shouted, suddenly cut off Mabel And Startled her.

Mabel: Uh, I think he said something about the carnival…

Jack: There's a carnival in town?

Mark: Get the guys!

Mark then rushed out of the room, Only to come back in.

Mark: Where are the guys?

**Meanwhile, At some random funfair.**

Dib: Wow… That was great!

He and Vana had just gotten off a Ferris wheel.

Vana: Yeah, I did not expect a Carnival to be in town.

Dib: Yeah kind of a good break from battling Villains.

Vana: Okay now that I prefer, Where's Dipper anyway?

Dib: I don't know, Ever since the Ult Al Cur thing he's actually been fine, Haven't seen much of him… Lately.

Vana looked at what Dib was staring at and immediately dow dropped, There was Dipper walking along and holding hands with a girl, She had Orange hair tied into large pigtails, A Brown and Tan checkered skirt, White leggings with black shoes, Who was… Holding Dipper's Hand!? At that Moment, Eric, Kitty and Trevor arrived.

Eric: Hey guys what's up?

Trevor: Is that Dipper with a girl?

Dipper heard Trevor and looked back, Seeing his Friends, (Dib and Vana.) He immediately let go of the Girl's hand.

Dipper: Oh uh, Hey… Guys, You guys cool?

Dib: Oh yeah, We're good, You seem fine.

Kitty chuckled.

Girl: Aren't you gonna introduce me to your friends Dipper?

Dipper: Uh… sure, Guys this is… Ashley…

Ashley: Jonathans, My name is Ashley Jonathans.

Trevor: Dipper's got a girlfriend!

Dipper: WHAT?! No I don't!

Eric and Trevor began dancing around Dipper and Ashley as they sang.

Eric and Trevor: _Dipper and Ashley sitting in a tree-!_

Dipper: I'm not actually! I just… I already!

Ashley: Hey, dipper It's fine, Just say we're-

Dipper: Going home! Yes! That's right, We're going home!

Dipper started in that direction when Ashley suddenly grabbed him.

Ashley: Hold it right there Dipper! You can't say we're going out when we're alone and than pretend we're not in front of my friends!

Dipper: We were going out?

Ashley: What do you mean we were going out? You were holding my Hand!

Dipper: ...I was lost.

Ashley: That's a lie!

Dipper: No it's not!

Ashley: Is too!

Dipper: Is not!

Ashley: Is too!

Dipper: Is not!

Ashley: Is too!

Dipper: Look I never said it was an Actual date!

Ashley gasped! Then shoved Dipper into a pool of Mud!

Ashley: We'll see who's not Actually dating you, jerk!

And she walked away grumbling.

Dib: Well… That escalated.

At that Moment, A Freedom watch drop ship landed in the Carnaval and Mark, Jack, Mac and Sokka burst out.

Mark: Get away from my nephew!

Dipper: Uncle Mark I wasn't in actual danger.

Mark: ...Oh.

**The next day.**

Mabel: So your friends know about Ashley now?

Dipper: Yeah, Evan Uncle Mark and the others! Soon the whole town gonna know!

Mabel: How's that bad?

Dipper sighed.

Dipper: Mabel, I'm gonna be honest, Ever since we lost everything I've been thrust into one crazy ordeal after another, Megalomaniacs, Ancient relics of power, Ancient kids of Power, More dark secrets about our Family! And I nearly got possessed! AGAIN!

Mabel: So your taking a break from the spotlight?

Dipper: Yes! And now everyones gonna be all over me again!

Mrs testaburger called.

Valorie: Dipper! There's someone at the door for you!

Dipper resisted the urge to scream and headed downstairs to the door.

Dipper: Ugh, What now! Cartman I swear if your here to-!

But it wasn't Cartman, But Ashley.

Dipper: Oh hey Ashley.

Ashley: Hi Dipper, Look I went off on you yesterday, So I wanted to make it up to you.

Mabel: Aww…

Ashley then handed out a Present with Purple and Red wrapping.

Ashley: With this gift!

Dipper took the present and unwrapped it, He looked at what was inside and took it out.

Dipper: Is this… A rack of handgrenades?

Ashley squirmed.

Ashley: Oh crap, That's not what I was gonna give you! Wiat here.

And she ran off, Three minutes later she came back with a Bottle of some kind of Orange beverage.

Dipper: Uh… what is that?

Ashley: Nothin, Just a little beverage for the two of us.

Dipper: What?

Ashley: Just let me come in.

Dipper: Why? So we can find a couple of cups.

Dipper and Ashley went into the kitchen and got out two glasses, Ashley opened the bottle and poured two cups of the liquid, Mabel went to get Wendy.

Dipper: Seriously what is this?

Ashley: A special juice, I bought it myself.

Dipper: From where?

Ashley: Don't worry about that just drink it with me will ya?

Dipper: Well I…

Ashley: Please Dipper?

Ashley fluttered her eyelashes.

Dipper: Well oh alright, Bottoms up.

Dipper then drank the Juice, Ashley just sat there and watched, Than pretended to drink the Juice when she saw Mabel come back with Wendy, But really she splashed it on a nearby plant and turned to Wendy.

Mabel: Wendy, You've got to meet Dippers new girlfriend!

Ashley: Oh Hello.

Wendy: HI I'm Wendy.

Ashley: Nice to meet you, Sorry we can't stay and chat but me and Dipper are going out soon, Aren't we Dipper.

Mabel and Wendy blinked, Dipper suddenly turned around, He looked like he'd bean brainwashed.

Dipper: Yes… Ashley?

Wendy: Wait? Right now?

Dipper: Totally…

Mabel and Wendy shrugged.

Mabel: Meh, Whatever.

Wendy: Fine by me.

And the two went upstairs, Leaving Dipper and Ashley alone.

Ashley: Come along sweetie…

Dipper: Where are we going?

Ashley: Somewhere nice and fun…

And with that, The two left the house.

**Meanwhile.**

Mark was in his room compiling a list of People who so far had it out for Dipper with Jack And Mac.

Mark: Okay so not counting minions like Redtooth Darkclaw and others We got, Eggman, Tak, Cluny, Zuko, Frollo, Grimhilde, Ratcliffe.

Mac: I'm pretty sure the former two are Dib and Vana's enemies.

Mark: Okay scratch them, Streisand's Dead, Haven't seen Damien mouse in a while...

At that Moment Mabel and Wendy came upstairs.

Mark: Oh girls, Could you help us with this with Gallery, Where's your Brother.

Wendy: He went out with Ashley.

Mac: Ashley? The girl from the Carnival?

Mabel: I know, I can't understand him anymore! He says he isn't looking for a Girlfriend, Than picks up Ashley, Than says he's not his Girlfriend then goes out with her after Drinking an Orange Drink.

Mac: What Orange drink?

Mabel: It wasn't Orange juice.

Jack paused.

Jack: And your saying he went out with her after drinking it?

Wendy: Yeah.

Mark: Must have been a Young love potion.

Mabel: A what?

Jack: A young love potion! It's like a love potion, But instead of the victim falling in love it brainwashes them to the Users will.

Wendy: What?

Mabel: How did she get this?!

Mac: Well it's a simple contraction really just a bit of…

Mark: When did you know about Potions?

Mac: You really think I'm all about Guns?

Jack: You better know, Because the bad news is as the Fluid spreads, The host will start falling in love for real, Until they become a twisted lovesick form of what they once were.

Mark, Mable and Wnedy were horrified! The quickly ran out the House screaming! Jack and Mac came after them!

Jack: Wait a minute! We don't know where Dipper actually is!

Mac pulled out his phone, And saw a Text from Dipper.

Mac: "_Hey guys going to __Buca __de Faggoncini with my Gal, Dipper." _He's at Buca de Faggoncini!

Jack suddenly grabbed Him and pulled him along.

Jack: Wait for us!

**Meanwhile.**

At the As for mention Restaurant, Ashley and Dipper were sitting at their table talking.

Ashley: So Dipper, Just wanted to say it was nice of you to bring me here. Well it was my Idea but hey, What are you gonna do?

Dipper: Yeah… What…?

At that Moment the waiter came with their Dinner.

Waiter: You're Dinner, Misnomer!

Ashley: Why thank- Wait, Isn't this an Italian restaurant?

Waiter: ...No.

And he walked off.

DIpper: So… what were we… Talking about…?

Ashley: I think it was about our families?

Dipper: What about… Your Parents…?

Ashley: Oh it's just me and them… They aren't around much.

Dipper: You're lucky… Mine are gone…

Ashley looked sympathetically at Dipper.

Ashley: Yeah I heard, It must be hard for you… To be without your Parents… Without your dad… Without that… Dad of yours… Henry was it?...

Ashley's tone grew Dark as she spoke, Her face looking bitter, It quickly went back to normal.

Ashley: I'm sorry, It probably bothers you.

Dipper: No… Thank you…

Suddenly, Mark, Mac, Jack, Mabel and Wendy burst in through the doors.

Mabel: There he is!

Suddenly the Curator stopped them.

Curator: I'm a Sorry, Do you have a Reservation a?

Mark just shoved him a side and led the others to Ashley and Dippers table.

Ashley: Crap what are they doing here?

Mark grabbed Dipper and took him out his seat.

Mark: Dipper we're going home.

Dipper: But I was…

Jack just got out a syringe full of Antidote.

Mabel: What the hell do you think you were doing to my Brother?

Ashley: Making him more Proactive?

Wendy: Listen you little…!

Suddenly, The waiter at Dipper and Ashley's table pulled out a gun! Along with a Janitor and waitress.

Waiter: Zis is a Hold up! Zis establishment will be ours!

Everyone screamed and got on the Ground! At that Moment the Chef and his assistants burst out of the Kitchen with Guns!

Mark: What the?!

Italian Chef: I a knew the French had a infiltrated us!

Wendy: What the Hell is going on here?!

French guy: Sachreblue! You Italian scum! Your Establishment shall ours!

He then fired at the Chef, Who jumped out of the way and took cover behind a table and fired a few rounds himself, Before long a Firefight broke out between Italians and French, Everyone screamed and ran out all Except, Dipper, Mabel, Mark, Wendy, Jack, Mac and Ashley who took cover under a table!

The firefight continued on, The Leader made his way to the chef, and Punched him, Only for the Chef to pick up a broken table leg and smack him with it, The Leader recovered and pulled out a knife, The chef quickly jabbed at him with the Legs broken end, Killing the leader.

By then the Fighting was over, The Italians had won, With the French infiltrators dead or Injured, Jack had injected an Antidote for the Young love potion during the fight.

Ashley: What the Fuck jsut happened?!

**Later.**

After 911 was called and everyone cleared out, Dipper, Ashley and the others talked with Srgt Yates.

Srgt Yates: Well folks you're lucky to have gotten out of there, French/Italian turf wars are nasty things to walk into.

Mac: No shit…

Dipper rubbed his neck where he was injected.

Dipper: I don't even know what was going on…

Mabel: Dipper, Ashley brain-

Ashley suddenly interrupted.

Ashley: Say Dipper, Sorry about this Craziness, Why don't we go… get some ice cream?

Dipper: Okay.

And with that, dipper and Ashley walked off, Leaving Mabel And the others even more Speechless.

Wendy: Should we keep an eye on her?

Mark: Definitely.

Then Aang and Katara showed up.

Katara: Hey guys we're out.

Aang: ...Did we miss something?

**Meanwhile.**

All seemed peaceful in the Gnome forest of Gravity falls, The day had just began and Gnomes were making their Daily scavenging through the Forest, One Gnome suddenly heard a noise like an Explosion he followed the sound, Suddenly starting to hear screaming and roaring coming from the town he started running towards it and stopped at the forest's edge to find Gravity Falls, Being Pillaged and Plundered!

**Wow, Now this was a Story, What did you think? If you don't like Ashley trust me there's more to her than meets the eye, and Looks like Jargafars gone and attacked Gravity Falls, How will Dipper and Mabel react to this? Stay tuned for future Episodes and Don't forget to look at my Other stories in the meantime more updates for them on the way.**

**Stay tuned.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Episode 31**

**Cartman's Dad is a mystery.**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr Garrison and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snake head lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover Legends.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle and Kenny got off at the bus stop one day and noticed something odd.

Dipper: Has anyone seen Cartman lately?

Stan: Can't say that I have.

Mabel: You think we should Check up on him?

Dipper: I don't know… Maybe.

Kyle: Why bother he'll turn up eventually.

Stan: He's been out of school for a week now, Don't you think we should look into this?

Kyle: I guess.

As they all went to Cartman's house and Rang the doorbell, Liane opened the door.

Liane: Oh hello kids.

Dipper: Mrs Cartman, We've been wondering why Cartman- I mean Eric hasn't bean showing up for school.

Liane: Oh he's been feeling under the weather, Maybe you kids can cheer him up, He's in the backyard.

Kyle: Doing what?

The kids crept into the back yard and saw Cartman… Having a tea party… with his Dolls… I, I did not write this.

CartmanWould you like some more Tea Polly prissypants?

Polly prissypants: Yes Eric, I would love some tea, Thank you.

Cartman mimicked the Voice of the doll and Handed it a cup of tea, Your very welcome Polly prissypants.

Carmtan: Would you like some Tea Clyde Frog?

Clyde Frog; Yes Eric, Why are you so Cool?

Cartman: Oh, I don't know Clyde Frog, I just am.

Polly prissypants: YOu are so Strong and Smart and everybody loves you!

Cartman: Why thank you Polly prissypants how nice of you.

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle and Kenny couldn't believe what they were seeing.

Stan: Dude, This pretty fucked up right here.

Kenny muffled something quickly.

Kyle" C'mon, Let's make fun of him.

Dipper held him back.

Dipper: No wait, This looks pretty serious, Maybe we should talk to an adult about this.

Mabel: You sure?

Peter Panda: Wow Eric, You are the Coolest in the world, This is tremendous tea!

Cartman: Why thank you Peter Panda, It's distinctive Earl grey.

Polly prissypants: Eric is the best!

Clyde frog: Hooray for Eric.

Peter panda: Eric Kicks Ass.

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle and Kenny returned to school while after school activities were going on and talked with Mr Mackey.

Mabel: Thanks for seeing us Mr Mackey, Somethings really wrong with Cartman.

Mr Mackey: Oh well there's a news flash.

Stan: no somethings really, Really really wrong with him, He was having a tea party with Stuffed animals.

Kyle: Yeah, he was pouring them tea and doing their voices.

Mr Mackey was surprised.

Mr Mackey: Oh… M'kay, Maybe he's suffering from some kind of Emotional distress, M'kay.

Kenny: (What do you mean?)

Mr Mackey: Have you kids noticed Anything recently that troubled Eric?

Mabel: No not that we know of.

Mr Mackey: Well something is obviously troubling him.

He got up and retrieved a video camera off his bookshelf.

Mr Mackey: Take this, If you can videotape Erocs behavior, I can study him Psychologically and study him and find out what's wrong M'kay.

Stan: Okay, Dipper you wanna… Dipper?

No one had noticed Dipper walking out of the room… Or the Father's day signs.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at Cartman's house, Cartman was still having a tea party with his Stuff animals.

Cartman: My goodness that's a lovely dress you are wearing Polly prissypants.

Polly prissypants: On thank you Eric, You are such a gentleman.

Peter Panda: Yes, Eric, You are also smart and cool, And everybody likes you very much.

Cartman: That's nice Peter panda.

Behind the Bushes, Stan, Kyle, Mabel and Kenny ahd set up a video camera dn wer taping Cartman.

Stan: Dude this is gonna be the funniest video ever made!

Kyle: How much do you think Mr Mackey needs?

Mabel: I don't know, just keep rolling.

Cartman: More tea Rumple Tupskin?

Rumple Tupskin: Yes Please Eric! You are tough and Handsome!

Carmtan: Thank you Rumple Tupskin, And what do you think about me Clyde Frog?

Clyde Frog: I think you're a big fat Piece of Crap.

Cartman was silent for a moment.

Cartman: Ey!

**Meanwhile.**

Dipper walked into his house and went to the Table,

Valorie: Oh Dipper, Your back, Where's Mabel?

Dipper: With Stan, Kyle and Kenny.

Valorie: Hm, You seem a little down about something.

Dipper: Yeah, I guess, It's just… You know what's tomorrow?

Valorie thought then realized what was wrong.

Valorie: Oh… I see.

Dipper: So much has happened to me these months, So much has changed, I… I miss him… Both of them.

Valorie put a hand on Dipper's shoulder.

Valorie: Your parents were good people Dipper, What happened was a horrible thing, For all of us.

Dipper: Have we even had a funeral for them?

Valorie: No… I don't believe we have, Their bodies were never found.

Dipper suddenly lit up.

Dipper: So they could be alive?

Valorie: What?

Dipper got out of his chair.

Dipper: If their bodies were never found than they could be still out there!

Valorie: Dipper…

Dipper: Maybe if we sent a search party we could-

Valorie: Dipper…

Dipper: There has to be something-

Valorie: Dipper! Stop!... If your Parents were still out there they would have shown up by now… I'm sorry.

Dipper said nothing… He just went up to his Room.

**Meanwhile.**

At the Cartman Residence, Cartman and Liane were eating Dinner, Cartman stopped eating and looked at his mom.

Cartman: Mom, Can I ask you a question?

Liane: Sure hon.

Cartman: You know how like my friend Stan has… A dad?

Liane: Uh Huh.

Cartman: And my Friend Kyle has a Dad, And my Friend Kenny has a Dad, And Butters has a Dad, And Wendy testaburger has a Dad?

Liane: Yes?

There was a long silence.

(Thomas Silence Plays.)

Liane: Well what's your Question hon?

Cartman: Do I have a dad?

Liane: Oh…

Cartman: I want to know where I come from.

Liane thought for a moment.

Liane: Well you see Eric, When a man and a woman are Attracted to each other, They want to be close to each other, And sometimes the man puts his… Uh... "Ho-Ho...Dilly…" Into the womans… "Cha… Cha…"

Cartman was silent.

Cartman: So who put his Who Who Dilly in your Cha Cha.

Liane: Eric, The day I met your Father, It was like Magic, It was a beautiful Autumn night, Just before the End of the first half of the War, At the twlf annual Drunken Barn Dance.

**Flashback.**

_Liane: I was young and Naive back then._

_Otter: Wow, I've never seen a woman drink that Much, You're a Natural Mrs Cartman._

_Liane: Oh… You haven't seen nothing yet!_

_Toad: And-And-And, And that's why… Rolling pears, Are a better ad… Than Beetlejuice._

_Ratty: Beetlejuice isn't even an Ad!_

_Ichabod Crane: I escaped a decapitated Horseman!_

_At that Moment the band began to pick up the Rhythm faster._

_Jimbo: C'mon everybody! Let's all do the Drunken barn dance!_

_Mole: But we've already been doing it…_

_Liane: Everyone did it more, Anyway it was at that moment, I saw him! He was the most charming, Piece of Ass I had ever laid Eyes on in Crossover town! His name was Chief Runningwater._

**Flashback ends.**

Liane: I honestly don't remember what happened the rest of the night, But the next morning I was pregnant with you.

Cartman: So where's chief Running- I mean Dad now?

Liane: Eh… I never saw him again after that. To be honest I wasn't really interested in him. I was drunk, Although I heard he still lives on a small reservation 3 miles from the Hundred acre woods backyard borders.

Cartman was stunned.

Cartman: To think I'll this time I've been a natieve American.

**Meanwhile.**

Night crept on the Castle of Queen Grimhilde as the Evil queen stepped forward to her magic mirror.

Queen Grimhilde: Magic Mirror on the wall, At my command you will show me all.

Magic Mirror: What would thou know my Queen.

Queen Grimhilde: Show me again my future conquests.

The mirror flashed images at her queen, Different places to crush and Conquer.

Queen Grimhilde: Ah… Excellent, My force will grow strong enough soon, When they are, We will dominate these lands.

Evelvauna, The Bat aide to Grimhilde stepped forward from the shadows, Followed by Ogthar, Her latest recruit.

Ogthar: I look forward to such a vision my Queen.

Queen Grimhilde turned to face Ogthar.

Queen Grimhilde: Yes, I imagine so, But do remember who released you Ogthar, I know of your specific Talents that's why I freed you from your Imprisonment.

Ogthar: And I shall Deliver my Queen.

And with that he left the room and Returned to his Lab.

Ogthar: Rhoga! Thudd!

The two Anthropomorphic Dinosaurs bumbled into the Room.

Rhoga: You called Boss?

Ogthar: I have an Important Assignment for the pair of you.

Thudd: Uh sure boss, What did you have in mind?

Ogthar: Bring me Eggs.

Rhoga and Thudd: Huh?

Ogthar: To hatch, With my Ruby sunstone, I shall create for the Queen a new Army of Reanimated Dinosaurs, To help us conquer the world in Her name!... So, Avian eggs… Can you handle it?

Rhoga and Thudd gaped for a bit then grew more Confident.

Rhoga and Thudd: Absolutely…

And they both sniggered.

**Meanwhile.**

At an Indian reservation outside the westside of the Hundred acre wood, Several Indian reservationists sat around a campfire, One of them came up to their leader.

Indian: Running water, There some kid hear to see you.

Running water: What kid?

Indian: He claims to be your kid.

On que, Cartman burst in dressed as a native American himself.

Cartman: Hi dad!

Running water: Who the hell are you?

Cartman: I'm your son Eric, My mom said you put your who who dilly in her Cha Cha at the drunken barn dance before the final battle of the war's first stage.

Running water: Your mother?

Cartman: Liane Cartman.

Running water: Cartman?!

Running water laughed.

Running water: Oh boy, I was worried for a second, Look kid, I'm not your father.

Cartman: What? But my mom said you were the guy she was with.

Running water: Kid, I hate to break this to you but your Mother is what we native Americans refer to in kid friendly terms as, "Bear with wide Canyon."

Cartman: Huh?

Running water: She is "Do who who can not keep legs together."

Cartman was still confused.

Running water: Your moms a Slut.

Cartman: Ey!

Running water: Plus she was too drunk to remember what happened, Let me tell you the rest of the Story.

**Flashback.**

_Running water: We got tired of Dancing, So we went off to find a Private spot in some hay, I knew that she wanted me because she kept saying romantic things._

_Liane: Oh chief, I want your heart manchowder._

_Running water: Woah! Hello! "I said." As we started getting into she stopped._

_Liane: Wait, Wait! Who's that!?_

_Running water: The Crowd parted to reveal a Fat Black man, Liane was completely enamoured with him._

_Liane: Chief, Could you excuse me for a minute?_

_Running water: What? You gotta be kidding me! "I said." I watched as she made her way over to the man._

_Liane: Why hello there, I don't think I've seen you around here before._

_Chef: No, I'm new in town._

_Liane: Well, What's a nice Handsome "Black" man doing in a sweet little patch of heaven like Crossover town?_

_Chef: I'm planning to open my own restaurant here._

_Liane: My how exciting, Would you care to, Put your tongue in my mouth?_

_Chef: Damn, Baby you cut right to the chase don't you?_

_Liane: I'm plasted._

_Running water: That person's name I later learned was Jerome Mcelroy._

**Flashback end.**

Cartman: What?! Jerome McElroy?! Chef is my dad?!

Running water: He's the last person I saw with your Mom that night.

**Meanwhile the next Morning.**

Dipper sadly made his way to the bus stop the next morning, There he found Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Mabel starting a Go Cart.

Dipper: What's going on?

Mabel: Kenny found a Used go kart in his yard and is gonna ride it!

Dipper: Wow… Fun.

Kyle: Hey Stan, Did you send the tape to America's Stupidest home videos?

Dipper: What?

Stan: Yeah, I sent it last night, What Sucks is that we have to watch that Stupid Bob sagen guy to find out if we won.

Dipper: Hang on you did what?!

Stan: Uh yeah, While you were gone we watched this stupid show with my grandpa called America's stupidest home videos.

Kyle: It said if we sent our most stupidest home videos we'd get 10,000 dollars if we win.

Dipper: ...Mabel?

Mabel: I swear I did not agree to this.

Dipper: Are you guys serious!? There is a kid with a serious problem right now and you wanna Embarrass him behind his Back!?

Stan: Dude, It's just cartman.

Dipper: Just Cartman- You honestly-!?

Mabel: He's coming right now.

Dipper: what?

Up came Cartman, bizarrely Dressed like and 80's Rapper.

Cartman: Sup homies?

Stan: Cartman?

Cartman: I was just down in the SPC, Kicking it with some G's on the West side!

Kyle: Didn't you come by yesterday and say you were a native American?

Cartman scoffed.

Cartman: Ha! Right, Like I'm some hippie indian, You know what I'm saying? G? Check it out I'm gonna go with my Dad.

And he Moonwalked away.

Mabel: He was anative American yesterday.

Dipper: Dude, We should make a Video out of this We'd get another 10,000 dollars.

Dipper: NO! We are not making more Videos of Cartman Making an Ass of himself!... That didn't come out right.

Suddenly the Go Kart started and Dragged Kenny along with it, He flew down the road bumping into things as he went.

Dipper: Kenny!

Kenny screamed as the Kart veered off the road and ran through some trees, Then flew over a rock and landed on some nearby Train Tracks.

Kenny: (I'm okay guys!)

Suddenly a train crushed him to death as it sped past.

Stan: Oh my god! They killed Kenny!

Kyle: You bastards!

**Meanwhile.**

Cartman made his way to Chef's house and knocked on his door, Chef Answered.

Chef: Hello?

Cartman: Yo Pops.

Chef Stared.

Chef: Boy, What the fudge are you doing!?

Cartman: You just, Laying down some rhymes for my g folk you know what I'm saying.

Chef: Get in here!

Chef grabbed Cartman and Dragged him inside!

Chef: Take that wig off! What's gotten into you!?

Chef: What's gotten into you!

Cartman: Your my dad Chef, Chief running water said you got together with my mom at the Drunken Barn dance before the final battle of the Wars first stage.

Chef: What?! No! Uh… Did I?

Cartman: He said you kissed her with your tongue.

Chef: Oh, That's different, Women don't get pregnant from that Eric.

Cartman: Oh… So you're not my Dad.

Chef: Of course not, Here let me tell you where Babies come from, and You'll see How I'm not your dad

Chef: _When a man loves a woman._

_And a woman loves a man._

_Actually sometimes the man doesn't love the woman but,_

_He acts like he does as long as he gets some action Hah._

_The magic Starts to happen and the two take off their clothes! That's right._

_They caress and touch each other, Until the part of the man grows,_

_They roll around and now things are really starting to Get hot._

_And the man says I love you and the woman says._

"_Hold on a second I gotta go to the Bathroom."_

_So you wait and you wait and you wait and you wait._

…

_And you wait and you wait and you wait and you wait._

_You wait and you coling down while she's still going to the bathroom._

_Finally she comes back, And she says, Baby I'm getting hot!_

_And that's when you gotta jam her up front and! #$$&^ *_

Cartman: WHAT?! Who did all that to my mom at the Drunken Barn dance!?

Chef stopped signing.

Chef: Oh that? That was a long time ago, Just before the first stage of this war ended. I'll tell you what I remember.

**Flashback.**

_Liane: Oh Jerome, You're so strong._

_Jimbo: Hey everybody! Look who's here!_

_Chef: It was the AFC champion Denver Broncos, They had Lianes attention but they weren't what turned her on._

_Liane: Oh, Oh Chef._

_Chef: "Damn woman, What's gotten into you?" I asked, I saw an Arm sticking out of the Hay and pulled it out. "Garrison!? What the hell are you doing?"_

_Mr Garrison: Your Drunk Mr Hat!_

_Chef: Aw man, I'm outta here._

_Liane: Oh c'mon chef, Haven't you ever heard of a threesome?_

_Chef: "Yeah, when two Women are involved." I said, And I left._

_Mr Garrison: Damn it! Well looks like it's just you and me Mrs Cartman._

**Flashback.**

Chef: And that's who she was with last, Mr Garrison.

Cartman was Horrified!

Cartman: NO!

**Meanwhile.**

At Stan's house, Stan, Kyle, Dipper and Mabel watched America's stupidest home videos.

Bob Sagen: Here's a video sent to us that shows a very disturbed little boy.

Cartman's video played and the Audience laughed.

Dipper: Why are we even watching this?

Kyle: C'mon dude, Don't you want 10,000 dollars?

Dipper: Don't you guys even feel remotely bad that you're doing this behind his back?!

Stan: Oh come on Cartman's an Asshole.

Dipper: Yeah, but it doesn't justify what you're doing! This could hurt his feelings.

Mabel: Or just really piss him off.

Dipper: Okay yeah I guess but this is still wrong.

Bob Sagen: Now the moment you've all been waiting for, When one of our lucky videos Qualifies for the ten thousand dollar grand prize to be chosen tomorrow night, The winner is… Little boys tea party!

Stan and Kyle cheered!

Stan: We did it! We're in the Finales!

Kyle: We're gonna win ten thousand dollars!

Mabel: Dipper can I talk to you?

Dipper and Mabel went off to the Corner.

Mabel: Okay look, I swear I barely had anything to do with this, I walked off as soon as they came up with the Idea.

Dipper: So you didn't try to stop them?

Mabel: Well, Not really, Look Dipper I know this seems wrong but let's face it Cartman's kind of a jerk so Humiliating him wouldn't be too far deserving.

Dipper: Yeah but with this? I mean, You know what's tomorrow? Ri-

Mabel: I don't wanna be reminded.

Mabel suddenly turned away with her arms crossed.

Dipper: Maybe it wouldn't hurt if we… Sympathize with Cartman?

Mabel looked back sadly.

Mabel: Where is Cartman?

**Meanwhile.**

Mr Garrison: Mr Hatt you need to admit you have a drinking Problem.

Cartman burst into the Bar and glared Daggers at Mr Garrison.

Cartman: You!

Mr Garrison turned around in Surprise.

Cartman: All this time… It was you! Why didn't you tell me Father?!

Mr Garrison: Eric? What are you doing here? And what are you talking about?

Cartman: It's been you all along! You were with my mother at the night of the Drunken Barn dance!

Mr Garrison gasped!

JImbo: Garrison? That can't be he's gay.

Cartman: Then did you sleep with my mom?

Mr Garrison: No!

Sparx: So he's gay.

Mr Garrison: Alright! Alright! I confess! I had sex with your mother at the Drunken Barn dance! But who here didn't?! Huh?

Everyone suddenly froze.

Mr Garrison: Now c'mon honestly who here hasn't slept with Liane Cartman?

Everyone in the bar looked awkwardly at each other.

Halfy: I haven't.

Richard waterson: You count halfy you don't have any legs.

And he didn't'.

Mr Garrison: So you see Eric, Any one in town could be your Father, I'm afraid you're never going to know.

Cartman looked down sadly, Jimbo came over.

Jimbo: Hey, Don't feel too bad kid, I never knew who my real father was either, Well I did know who he was and we had some great times together like huntin and Fishin-

Nichole: Shut up Jimbo.

Cartman sadly walked out of the Bar when Dr Mephesto Stopped him.

Dr Mephesto: Wait! Wait! I know a way to find out.

Carmtan: How?

Dr Mephesto: At my lab! We can do a DNA test. I'll take a sample of your Blood and Everyone else here to determine who your Father is.

Cartman: Really? You can?

Dr Mephesto: Yes of course, It;ll cost a pretty penny though.

Cartman: How much?

Dr Mepehsto: 3,000 should cover it.

Cartman: What? But I don't have three thousand Dollars!

Dr Mepehsto: Well make some.

Cartman's face fell as he walked out.

**The next morning.**

Cartman walked sadly down the Street next morning kicking a small rock, Along the way he met Dipper and Mabel.

Dipper: Hey Cartman…

Cartman: Hey guys.

Mabel: So how do you feel?

Cartman: Oh you know… Fine…

Dipper: So… Nothing wrong at all then?

Cartman: Well, To be honest, I just wanna know who my dad is… But to find out they have to do a DNA test and they cost 3,000 dollars, And I don't have three thousand dollars.

Dipper and Mabel were taken aback.

DIpper: Uh… Wow.

Cartman: Yeah, it sucks, I have to know who my Father is, I just have to, Maybe I could work in a sweatshop for a while-

Mabel: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, You don;t have to do that, We actually think we can help you.

Cartman: You do?

Dipper: Uh yeah, Stan and… We have a video tape that's in the Finals for America's stupidest home videos and if we win, We'll give you three thousand of the Ten dollar thousand prize.

Cartman was delighted.

Cartman: You will? Wow! Thank you guys!

Dipper: Uh, Yeah sure… Mabel calls Stan and Kyle…

**Later.**

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle and Cartman sat on the Couch at Cartman's house as the TV played.

Cartman: So what kind of Video did you guys make?

Stan: Uh, You'll see…

Mabel whispered to Dipper.

Mabel: What did it take to get them to agree?

Dipper: I told Stan I'd tattle to Wendy and said Kyle Cartman would say the K word if he didn't.

Bob Sagen: And now it's time to crown the Ten thousand Dollar winner, Eh, Eh, Eh, Eh… Our judges have narrowed it down to only three videos. First it's "God who puts hat on Master's head."

Voice: Oh, Oh I'm a little Dog, I'm a little dog, Look I'm gonna put a hat on my masters head."

Everyone laughed.

Bob Sagen: And now our Second Finalist, "Little boy has a tea party."

Cartman: WHAT?!

Cartman's eyes bulged as his video was played.

Bob sagen: Boy, Does this kid need some therapy, Eh, Eh, Eh, Eh, Eh, Eh…

Stan: C'mon Cartman We're sure to win Than you'll get the money!

Cartman: I… Am… So… Pissed… Off… Right… Now…

Kyle: They laughed hardest at our video, We're gonna win!

Bob sagen: And finally our third contestant, "Child gets hit by a train!"

Suddenly a video appeared, It showed Kenny started his go Kart, Than the Events leading up to his death! Everyone laughed.

Dipper: What the hell?

Bob sagen: Now that's what I call a joyride! And the winner is Naturally… "Little boy being hit by a train."

Stan: Dude! We lost.

Kyle: Damn it!

Cartman's face grew red with Anger.

Cartman: I… Am… going… to… Fucking… Kill you guys… Seriously!

Bob Sagen: Stand up and take a bow Mr Marsh.

Grandpa Marsh: Yes! I won! I won!

Stan: GRANDPA!?

Mabel: I was accepting Randy for a moment.

Bob sagen: Our other Runner ups will have to settle for their Three Thousand prizes, Well see you next time folks.

Kyle: hey, We still get three thousand Dollars, That's enough for Cartman to do his DNA test!

Dipper: Sweet! Do you hear that… Cartman?

Cartman: Kill… You… Guys… Kill… You... Guys…

**Later.**

At Dr Mepestos lab, Everyone had gathered together for the test.

Dr Mepeshto: Alright, From everyone's Accounts, I've narrowed down Erics possible Father to the Following People here, Officer Barbrady, Chef, Jimbo, Mr Garrison, Ned, Running water, Gerald Brovflowksi, Winnie the Pooh, Piglet, Tigger, Eoyore, Rabbit, The Seven Dwarves, Myself, My friend Kevin, or the 1989's Denver Broncos.

Stan: Wow, Who Cartman's mom was that much of a slut…

Dr Mepeshto: The test results are in this envelope, Shall I open it?

Mr Garrison: Yes! For god's sake get on with it!

Dr Mepesto Opened the Envelope and read it.

Dr Mepesto: I have it, The Father of Eric Cartman is someone in this room! The Father is…

_**Who is Eric Cartman's Father? Is it? Chief Running water? Or is it Piglet? Or is ti Tigger? Or Rabbit? Or Chef? Or Mephisto? Or that little Monkey guy? Or is it Mr Garrison.**_

Grumpy: Nope not him, He's gay.

Mr Garrison: Hey!

_**Is it, Grumpy?**_

Grumpy: Ah!

_**Or Jimbo?**_

Jimbo: AH!

_**Or is it Officer Barbrady.**_

Officer Barbrady: Huh? Where?

_**Or is it Ned?**_

Ned: Could be.

_**Or is it Doc? Or Happy, Or Sneezy, Or Bashful.**_

Bashful: Aw shucks.

_**Or is it, Dopey? Or Sleepy? Or Eeyore?**_

Eeyore: Thanks for noticing…

_**Or is it, Pooh Bear.**_

Pooh: Oh bother.

_**Or is it Mr Broflowski!**_

Kyle: Dad! how could you!?

_**Or is it the Denvor Broncos! The answer is coming, Next Episode! After other Stories are updated.**_

Cartman: What? Son of a Bitch!

**Flash!**

Lord Jargafar: Stay tuned folks.

**Fade to black.**

Lord Jargafar: Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh…

**To be continued.**

**Queen Grimhilde: Hey what about us?**

**Ogthar: We're gonna build an Army People! Hello!?**


	11. Chapter 11

**Crossover legends.**

**Cartman's dad is still a mystery.**

**Previously on Crossover legends.**

Dr. Mephesto: The Father is definitely someone in this Room.

**Who is Eric Cartman's father?**

**Find out tonight on this long-awaited Episode!**

**(Gravity falls intro plays.)**

(Dipper, Mark, Dib, Vana, Jack, Mac, Aang, Sokka, Kitty, Trever, Eric, Momo and Appa brave the Mountain snowstorms, As they make it out they come to what lies before them.)

(Wendy Testaburger looks behind her and waves as the scene pans out to reveal South park.)

(Dipper is Dragged away from the Group and embraces Mabel, then both get scooped up in Randy's arms.)

(Dib and Vana show Mark and Jack a large footprint inside a bigger footprint, Scenes show the school and Forests of Crossover town.)

**Dipper and Mabel.**

**Brian and Stewie.**

**Stan Kyle Kenny and Cartman.**

**Wendy Testaburger.**

**Chef, Mr. Garrison, and Randy marsh.**

(Dipper, Mabel, and the Marsh family sit around a campfire, While the shape of a snakehead lurks in the shadows.)

(Scenes of Dr. Eggman, Tak, Cluny the Scourge and the Horned King appear, Along with Lord Jargafar removing his hood in the shadows.)

(Several scenes with different Characters appear.)

**Crossover Legends.**

Cartman: Man this felt like the longest minute of my life.

Dipper: I'll say, It's like someone dropped off on this to work on other projects.

Just than Kenny came in.

Kyle: Oh hey Kenny.

Dr. Mephesto: As I was saying, The Father of Eric Cartman is someone in this room, And the Answer is…

Suddenly everything went Dark!

Mr. Garrison: Hey what the?!

Piglet: Oh D-D-Dear, What is that?

Jimbo: It's a power outage!

Suddenly a gunshot was heard throughout the room and the lights came back on.

Chef: IS everybody Alright? That sounded like a gunshot!

Officer Barbrady: Oh my god! Look!

Everyone looked to the floor and gasped, There laying on the ground with blood coming out of his wounds, Was Dr. Mephesto.

Kenny: (Oh my God! They killed Mephesto!)

Kyle: You bastards!

Pooh: On No!

Doc: Mephesto's bean Hot er Shot!

Everyone quickly crowded around and Chef knelt down.

Rabbit: Quick! Check his pulse!

Grumpy: Is he… Dead?

Sneezy, Sleepy, and Happy than saw a broken window.

Happy: Look! They must have broken in through the window.

Bashful: That means the Shooter wasn't someone in this room.

Tigger: Well geez, Who was it then?

**Who shot Mephesto? Was it Randy? Or was it Toad? Or was it Mr. Mackey. Or Sokka. Or-**

Cartman: EY! Wait a minute, I haven't found out who my father was!

**Or was it Katara? **

Chef: Wait! He's still breathing!

Bashful: Someone has to get him to the hospital quick!

Chef: I'll take him, C'mon Children!

Chef picked up Mephesto and Rushed out the Door, With Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny following, Cartman followed after.

Cartman: Ey! Wait a minute! Who's my Father!?

Gerald: Oh that poor Kid, It must be hell for him to go through all this.

Liane looked down with a sigh.

Rabbit: We can't worry about that now! There's a killer loose in Crossover town, We have to catch them before they try to kill again!

Piglet: But who could it be?

Jimbo: And who could they kill next?

**Who will they kill next? Will it be, Mrs. Crabtree? Mac Gunsling? Mavis Richards?**

**Meanwhile.**

Chef drove up the road to Hell Pass Hospital as the Snow fell all around the car, The Kids sat in the car with him and Mephesto in the back.

Cartman: Is he okay?

Dipper: He's bleeding pretty bad back here.

Stan: Could you pull over so I can get out?

Chef: What? Why?

Kyle: Yeah Stan we have to get to the Hospital.

Stan: But I can't stand hospitals.

Chef: Sorry Stan, We just gotta get Mephesto there, and then we can get out.

Cartman: Hurry up! Mephesto can't die!

Kyle: Maybe it's better that you don't know who your Father is Cartman.

Cartman: No! I can't leave this unfinished.

Dipper: This is gonna be a long Car ride…

**Meanwhile.**

Ratty, Mole, Sharon, Randy, Sheila, Officer Barbrady, Jimbo, Sergeant Yates, and Mark Testaburger stood in the Mayor's office.

Mark: What are you going to do Mayor? There is a killer on the loose!

Sheila: We can't evan leave our Homes in fear of our Children's safety.

Randy: Uh where are the kids?

Sharon: Stan, Dipper, Mabel, Kenny, Kyle, and Eric went with Chef to get Dr. Mephesto to the hospital from what I heard.

Mayor McDaniels: Sergeant Yates, Let's pretend for one moment that we had a Competent Non-Freedom watch Law enforcer in this town, What would he do?

Sergeant Yates: Start investigating all the black homes-

Everyone: No.

Mayor Mcdaniels: C'mon people we've got to think! Jimbo do you-?

Suddenly, Mavis Richards entered the Room, Followed by three men.

Mavis: Mayor McDaniels, Sorry to interrupt but I heard what has happened.

Randy: Oh god…

Mayor McDaniels: Mrs. Richards I don't know what you want, but-

Mavis: Oh yes, The supposed Killer, As I said I heard about that and I believe I may have a bit of a Solution.

Mayor McDaniels: What is it?

Mavis: These gentlemen behind me are the crew for America's most wanted, They came at my Husband's invitation.

Mark: And where has he been might I ask?

Mavis: Abroad, Though that's no important right now, They heard of what has just happened and I believe they can be of… Assistance.

Mayor McDaniels: Uh… How?

Director: We just wanna do a Recreation of what happened, Than we can flash a number on the screen that people can call if they know anything about Dr Mephesto's attacker.

Mayor McDaniels: And this won't make us look dangerous?

Producer: Don't worry Mayor, America's most wanted isn't about Violence, It's About Family.

Cameraman: It is?

The Producer nudged him.

Sharon: Wait, so we're using a TV show to catch the shooter?

Mavis: How do you think To catch a predator works?

Sheila: Don't they usually trick the Pedophile into coming into the home when they catch him?

Mavis: Yes, but this is a new twist on the Subject.

Mayor McDaniels: Well if helps catch the Shooter, I guess we could try it.

director: Fantastic, We'll get right on it, Who should we cast first?

**Who will they cast first? Will it be? Mr. Garrison? Grumpy? Winnie the pooh? Chef?**

**Meanwhile.**

Dib sat on the Park bench with a telescope as the snow came down around him, He felt the snowflakes touch his nose as he shivered, Unaware that Vana just came up to him in a Violet winter coat and Pink scarf with a purple snowcap.

Vana: You really didn't think to wear a coat in this weather?

Dib: What did you expect? I thought it would be cooler here.

Vana: It's colorado Dumbass, Why would you expect it to be cooler, What are you even doing out here?

Dib: Well I was hoping to catch a few stars tonight, But due to this blasted weather-

Vana cut him off as she took off her own coat and put it around him, Than sat down next to him.

Dib: ...Wouldn't you get cold too?

Vana: Your right.

She took the coat back, Dib shivered again.

Vana: You already have a coat.

Dib: I guess, It's my ears that are freezing.

Vana took off her Cap and gave it to Dib.

Dib: Uh… Thanks.

Dib put it on, The two sat in silence for a moment as the snow fell all around them.

Dib: So have you seen Dipper lately?

Vana: I don't know, Still with that Sister of his.

Dib: Or his Girlfriend?

Vana: What, Ashley Jones?

Dib: Jonathan.

Vana: Whatever, And I'm not sure about her, But his Sister, I think they went to the Hospital with her.

Dib: Oh… You notice something?

Vana: What?

Dib: It feels like ever since we've come to this town, Dipper's kinda blown us off.

Vana: It's his Sister, the one he's been apart from for months, What did you expect?

Dib: I know but- Wait what was that?

A shuffling noise could be heard a good distance away.

**Meanwhile.**

Chefs' car raced up to the Hospital entrance and Chef himself dismounted with the Kids.

Chef: C'mon children, We have to find a doctor.

The kids Scrambled inside as Stan quizily stopped at the door.

Stan: Ugh, I can't do it dude.

Mabel: C'mon Stan, Hospitals aren't all that bad.

Dipper: Just c'mon!

Dipper pulled Stan in with him, They made their way to the Operating room where the Doctor was.

Chef: Doctor!

The Doctor in question was currently working on another patient.

Dr Doctor: One moment Please, Nurse Goodly, I need twenty cc's of Sodium pentathol Stat.

A red headed Nurse with no Arms leaned down to a needle and picked it up with her mouth.

Kyle: Uh, Why does she not have any arms?

Dr Doctor: We're an equal opportunity to employ here son.

The Nurse spat the Needle into Dr Doctors hand.

Chef: Doctor, We got a Wounded man outside.

Dr Doctor: I'll be there in a second, After I inject this man with a needle.

Stan: Oh no I'm gonna be sick.

Dr Doctor: There, There young man, Medic science is nothing to be afraid of.

Then injected the needle into the man's body causing lots of Blood to spew out, Stan nearly threw up!

Dr Doctor: Opps, He's hemorrhaging.

Blood squirted out and nearly hit Stan, Than his head fell off.

Dr Doctor: Opps, His head fell off.

Stan: I'm getting out of here.

And Stan ran out the door.

Dr Doctor: Hmm, Some people just have a weak stomach.

Dipper: What kind of Doctors are you?!

**Meanwhile.**

At the Set of America's most wanted Auditions were being held.

Tryout 1: And the Father of Eric Cartman is… Bang! Oh Joey! I've been shot!

Director: Great we'll get back to you, I think we've seen enough genetic engineers, Let's move on to auditions for the Part of Mister… Uh… Garrison.

The Mephesto left the Stage and a Man dressed as Mr Garrison with a Sock puppet took his place.

Tryout 2: Boy I sure hope I'm not the father of Eric Cartman Mr Hatt.

Sock puppet: You can say that again Mr Garrison.

Director: All right not bad, We'll get back to you, Next!

The tryout dismounted and M Garrison himself took his palace.

Mr Garrison: Boy I sure hope I'm not the father of Eric Cartman Mr Hatt.

Mr Hatt: You can say that again Mr Garrison.

Director: Thank you next.

Mr Garrison: What!?

Director: Next!

Mr Garrison left the stage crestfallen and allowed another Tryout to take his place.

Tryout 3: I sure hope I'm not the father of Eric Cartman Mr Hatt.

Hand Puppet: You can say that again Mr Garrison.

Director: Perfect! You got it! Let's move on to Eayors.

Mark, Jack and Mac watched from the sidelines.

Jack: This is pointless! Do they honestly think this will work?

Mark: Mavis seems to think so, But then she probably has some ulterior motive.

Mac: You think she's behind the shooter?

Mark: Perhaps… But we don't know for sure, I just hope Mabel and Dipper are safe right now.

**Meanwhile.**

Dib and Vana crept up behind a bush and peered over the other side.

Dib: What do you see?

Vana looked closer and gasped.

Vana: Holy…

Dib: What?

Vana pointed and Dib's jaw dropped, In front of them were a pair of giant, Humanoid Dinosaurs, One was Sky blue and had a long neck with a snout, THe other was shorter and Orange and had spikes in the sides of his back, They were carrying large white sacks and shaking a tree, WIth a birds nest, Out fell some eggs, which they quickly caught, Careful not to break them.

Thudd: Gee Rhoga, What you think they're gonna do with these Eggs?

Rhoga: What do you think Genius, These Eggs are supposed to be our… Ancestors.

Thudd: Yeah, The gene pool kinda went down a little huh?

Rhoga: Shut up Doofus.

And the two Dino creatures marched off with their Sacks, Leaving the two kids in the Bush in awe.

Dib: Did you… See that?

Vana: I saw it but I don't believe it.

Dib and Vana stared right ahead, Unaware of the increase of Falling snow.

**Meanwhile.**

Dr Doctor: Well this is about All I can do for him.

Dr Mephesto was soon hooked up to a life support system.

Cartman: Can you get him to talk? I have to know who my Father is.

Dr Doctor: Sorry son It might be a while.

To everyone's shock, Cartman leapt onto Mephestos bed and began slapping his face.

Cartman: Wake up you son of a bitch!

Chef: Woah!

Kenny: (Holy Shit!)

Dr Doctor grabbed Cartman off him and placed him on the floor.

Dr Doctor: Now hold on Son That's not gonna do him any good, I'll let you know if there's a change in his condition.

Cartman: I can't wait anymore! What am I supposed to do!

Mabel: You could try imagining yourself with a Talking bucket head.

Mabel put a Bucket on her head to emphasize.

Mabel: _Hey Eric, Shut up._

Cartman grabbed the bucket and began… Punching it.

Cartman: You son of a bitch! I'll kick you in the nuts! I'll kick you-

Dipper: Mabel, Where did you get that bucket?

Stan: Who cares, let's just get out of here.

Kyle looked out the window.

Kyle: I don't know if that's possible guys.

Outside, The snow was falling harder than before.

Chef: Damn the storms getting worse.

Stan: Oh week.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the set, The Storm raged around the building as Mavis stared out the window, Oblivious the Directors voice.

Director: Okay let's rehearse the reenactment from the top before we shoot it.

Mavis seemed to ignore him and turned to another corner of the Room, Suddenly Mark appeared before her.

Mavis: Lieutenant Testaburger.

Mark: A quiet word Ma'am.

Mavis: By all means.

Mark and Mavis went to an area of the building away from everyone else.

Mark: What is your game here Richards.

Mavis: Game? Whatever do you mean?

Mark: Bringing a Live television show up here, Having them reenact a crime that just recently happened, Moments after it Happened, Why?

Mavis: To catch the Killer, I have Children too Testaburger, I want to keep them safe from this shooter.

Mark: You mean your shooter?

Mavis had a look of mock offense.

Mavis: My Shooter?! Such accusations, What makes you think-

Mark: I might have a few good ideas.

Mavis: What? Do you mean your niece and nephew? Or yes… They were there, weren't they?

Mark glared.

Mavis: Why so tense? Does it bother you? Not being able to be near them? Protect them?

Mark began to clench his fists.

Mavis: You think you can save them? So they won't end up like their poor Mother?

She let out a laugh.

Mavis: Oh how sweet, Tragic but sweet.

Mark then grabbed Mavis and shoved her against the wall.

Mark: If you evan think of laying one hand on them, So help me-

Mavis: You'll what? Hmm? What's the matter the hit a nerve there?

She then brought up her legs and kicked Mark off her, Then grabbed his arm and Judo flipped him to the ground.

Mavis: You can't do anything for them Testaburger, They'll join their parents soon.

And with that, She walked off, Leaving Mark glaring after on the ground.

Officer Barbrady: Wow this is a great movie.

**Meanwhile.**

Chef and the kids sat in the waiting room among other injured patients waiting in line, Stan looked about him, Witnessing other wounded and Maimed people somehow still alive but bleeding.

Stan: Uh… When can we get out of here?

Soon Dr Doctor and Nurse Goodly came in.

Bleeding woman: Dr. I can't focus.

Dr Doctor: We're doing the best we can ma'am, They've closed the pass up here so none of the other doctors can get through, the only ones here are me and Nurse Goodly.

Chef: What?! They closed the Pass?

Dr Doctor: Yes, I'm afraid we're critically understaffed, Unless we get help soon, All these people are completely fucked.

Everyone gasped.

Dr Doctor: Metaphorically speaking that is.

Cartman: What about Mephesto, Are you taking care of him?

Dr Doctor: He's on full life support and breathing fine, He shouldn't need help at all, So long as the power doesn't go out.

Dipper counted with his fingers and the power went out.

Dr Doctor: Oh, Who didn't see that coming a mile away.

Dipper: Gee No idea.

**Meanwhile.**

The intro to America's most wanted played as a voice spoke over it.

Voice: Tonight, on _America's Most Wanted_, a shooter is on the loose in Colorado, and its residents are up in arms! Here's your host, John Walsh.

John Walsh: Good evening and Welcome to America's most wanted, Tonight: terror has invaded the Free town of Crossover as Dr. Alphonse Mephesto was gunned down in his laboratory. America's most wanted has reconstructed this heinous act and hope that your calls could help solve the case.

At the Main set, Everything was ready.

Director: Action!

The Mephesto actor started to speak but then fell down.

Mephesto: I've been shot!

Garrison Actor: My god! Mr. Hatt got some help!

Hatt actor: Right away Mr Garrison.

Then Eric Roberts playing the Monkey guy Kevin fell to his Knees.

Eric Roberts: No! No! My life time partner and friend! Gone taken away in the wink of an eye!

Director: God Damn it, Eric Roberts is improving lines again.

Chef Actor: I need to get the man to a hospital, Who will help me.

Eric Roberts: This is not a world I want to live in!

Outside, A tree fell on the powerline, Causing a blackout throughout the room.

Jack: What the?!

Mark: Oh not again.

Director: What the Hell is this?!

Camera man: We lost the feed to Ela.

**Meanwhile.**

John Walsh: Uh we seem to have lost the feed from Colorado, So I guess we'll just show a movie of the current year, 2013.

**What 2013 movie will be shown? Will it be? Carrie? Hunger games: catching fire? Monsters university?**

**Meanwhile.**

Director: Somebody see why we!

Suddenly he Door burst open and Snow came pouring in everywhere.

Randy: God damn that Blizzards getting crazier!

Sharon: Where's Mavis?

Outside, Mavis whistled to herself as she snuck out of the building and got onto the roof where a Helicopter was waiting, For some reason.

**Meanwhile.**

The lights flickered on and off as everyone ran around in a Panic.

Nurse Goodly: Don't panic everyone, The power lines are down but we still have the Backup generator.

Dr. Doctor then came out.

Dr Doctor: Nurse I could use some help in here!

Nurse Goodly: Coming!

She followed after him.

Chef: It doesn't sound like that Generators gonna last long.

Cartman: Will Mephesto be okay?

Chef: I don't know.

**Meanwhile.**

Dib and Vana hurried through the Storm, Stumbling and fighting just to get through the winds.

Vana: WHY THE HELL IS THERE A SNOW STORM IN THE MIDDLE OF SPRING?!

Dib: I DON'T KNOW!

They moved on as best they could, The Cold and Frost biting into their skin.

Dib: DO YOU SEE ANYTHING?!

Vana managed to glimpse a building in the Distance.

Vana: THERE! SHELTER!

They trudged on towards the shape.

**Meanwhile.**

Dr Doctor: Please Mr Chef, There's a hundred people to tend here, And only myself and Nurse goodly are available.

Chef: What do you want me to do?

Dr Doctor: Do you know anything about surgery.

Chef: I once watched Quincy.

Dr Doctor: What?! You watched Quincy?! Put on some Scrubs, Kids, You six are now Honorary doctors, You must help us save these people.

Stan: No way dude.

Dipper: We have no medical expertise at all.

Dr Doctor: But you're some of the few able bodied people here, We have no choice.

Cartman: If it means helping Mephesto, We'll do it.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the set, Everyone was trapped inside, Randy went to Open the doors and Snow instantly blew in.

Randy: Damn we're not going anywhere for awhile.

Brian: We're snowed in?

Jack: Afraid so.

Stewie: Oh god we're trapped.

Mr Garrison: Like Rats on a submarine.

Mayor McDaniels: This has to be the worst storm I have ever seen.

Sharon: How do we get out of here?!

Pooh: Think, Think, Think, I've got nothing.

The Mayor then noticed Katara.

Mayor McDaniels: You! You're a waterbender right? Snow's made of Water, you could go outside and… You know, Magic hands…

Katara: What?! Okay first off, There are a lot of things wrong with what you're saying, One I'm barely trained I couldn't possibly be capable of that, and Two, Even If I could, The storm would be too much.

Director: So we're basically stuck here?

Mac: Goes not, Really famished here haven't eaten since Breakfast.

Sokka: Yeah I'm getting pretty hungry too.

Jimbo: Looks like there's one thing we might be facing here.

Everyone fell deathly silent.

Randy: He's right, The only option we have left is too… Eat each other to stay alive.

Everyone gasped in Horror.

Sharon: Randy it's only bean like four hours.

Aang: Yeah, Aren't we resorting to Cannibalism a little too early.

Jimbo: That's the law of the Land Airbender, I know it ain't pretty, But if some of us have to die so the rest of us have to stay alive so be it.

Rabbit: But how do we decide who?

Randy: Simple we draw straws.

Director: Now wait a minute, We all just had a big breakfast surely we can go without food for a little while right?

Randy: Too late, Pick a straw everyone.

Mark: No one's eating anybody!

Everyone turned to Mark, We can go for a while, But we just need to keep our heads and think of a way out of here!

Jimbo: Now wait a minute who the Hell made you the boss?

**Who the Hell made Mark the boss? Was it? Yates? Jack? Wendy testaburger?**

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the Hospital, Dipper, Mabel, Chef, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman all dressed in scrubs gathered over a Patient.

Dr Doctor: This man's appendix has burst, We're going to have to operate now with our limited power, I need you all to be strong for me.

Stan grimaced.

Dr Doctor: Nurse Goodly will take care of the anesthesia, Chef, Mabel, you two be her arms, Boys, you help me with suction and vagistism, Ready?

Stan: No!

Dr Doctor: Okay, First I'll make an incision of the chest, Over the heart.

He picked up an incision knife and cut into the chest creating a hole in the heart, This was too much for Stan, Who vomited right into the incision.

Dipper: Oh my god you vomited into the incision!

Dr Doctor: Suction!

Kenny pulled out a suction tube and it sucked the vomit right out of the incision just as the lights started to flicker.

Cartman: Hey who's screwing with the lights?

**Who is screwing with the lights? Is it? Katara? Chiro? Kitty Ko?**

Dipper: Okay this is getting annoying.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the stage area, Mark and Stewie had just set up a strange Communication port.

Mark: Badger? Badger are you there? Antuari?

A voice managed to be heard through the grabbed static.

_Gibson: _He-Hello?-_

Mark: Gibson? Gibson is that you?

Stewie: We must be getting through.

Mark: Gibson, If you can hear us, We are snowed in at the Stage area, We need help.

_Gibson: Don't know if- We can- Storms blocking out- Trying to find out- Send what help- Meantime-_

And it went dead.

Mark: Gibson, come in, Gibson!

Stewie: We lost the feed.

Mark: Damn, Well at least they'll send help, We'll just have to wait.

**Meanwhile.**

Back at the Hospital, Everyone had gotten out Blueprints for the Hospital and were going over them.

Dr Doctor: This is a map showing the location of another backup generator, Apparently they built a large highly advanced self sustaining generator, For just this kind of Emergency, But it's outside the Hospital.

Chef: So how do we get to it?

Dr Doctor: We must split up into two teams, Team A and Team B, Team A will consist of Myself, Stan, Nurse Goodly, Chef, Kyle, Dipper, Mabel and Cartman, Team B will consist of Kenny, They must turn on the Backup generator, To do that, You must brave the storm outside and Get into this sewage duct, Meanwhile Team A will maintain everything here, While Team B makes it through the Sewage duct, Remember that's you Kenny, and than climbs to the top of the Generator and turn it on, Are there any questions?

Cartman: Nope sounds like a sweet plan to me.

Mabel: Yeah Kenny barely does anything anyway.

Kenny glared.

**Later.**

Kenny climbed out of the sewage duct, Covered in shit and Exhausted, Here picked up his walkie talkie and listened.

_Dr Doctor: Team B? Come in Team B._

Kenny: (This is Team B.)

_Dr Doctor: You should be seeing a large Drift of Snow with some metal drifting out of it to your left._

Kenny looked to his left and saw the generator.

Kenny: (Yep looks like the Generator to me.)

_Dr Doctor: Good, Head towards it, Team A has done all we can for the Patients, It's up to you now, Team A out._

Kenny walked towards the Generator and opened the lid, to a variety of switches and levers, He pulled out his walkie talkie.

Kenny: (I've found the Generator.)

_Dr Doctor: Roger Team B, We're gathered around Mephesto Right now, Can you see the two Copper noses._

Kenny found it and picked it up in his hand.

Kenny: (Yep, Got it.)

_Dr Doctor: Good, Now is there a wire connecting it._

Kenny: No not really.

**Back with Mephesto.**

Dr Doctor: Darn, the Cables are disconnected, We have to link them together or we're screwed.

Kyle: Do you have any wire here?

Dr Doctor: There's no time, Once these lights flicker out all the Patients on life support will die.

**With Kenny.**

Kenny heard this and looked at the two wires, Then he held up the walkie and spoke.

Kenny: (I'll do it.

**With Mephesto.**

Dr Doctor: What? No Kenny you can't, There must be another way!

Nurse Goodly: What is it?

Dr Doctor: He's going to make the connection himself with his hands.

Kyle: What?! No he'll die!

Dipper: Kenny! NOOOO!

**With Kenny.**

Kenny picked up both wires and screamed as surges or Electricity ran right through him.

**With Mephesto.**

Stan: Oh my god! They killed Kenny.

Kyle: You bastards!

All around the lights start coming back on.

Chef: The power's back on.

Dr Doctor: Quickly! Get the scanner running.

Nurse Goodly pushed the Scanner to Mephesto and Mabel Hooked it up.

Dr Doctor: We've got a chance now!

Dipper: So everything's gonna be fine?

Chef: It looks that way Dipper.

**Meanwhile.**

What happened next was never shown, Nor would it be made into a side Story, But after the Freedom watch found what was causing the storm, Everything looked and felt like Spring again, The snow melted and cleared up.

At the Hospital all was well, Dr. Mephesto soon woke up, To find Chef watching over him.

Dr Mephesto: Where? Where am I?

Chef: You're at the Hospital Mephesto, You were shot.

Dipper: We never got round to finding out who did it.

Dr Mephesto: Hmm, Must have been my Brother Albert, He tries to shoot me every month.

Chef: Oh, I see.

Dr Doctor: Where's Cartman? He'll be delighted to hear that Mephestos is alive.

Chef: He and the other kids went looking for Kenny.

**Meanwhile.**

Outside, Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Kyle and Cartman starred solemnly at the Frozen figure of Kenny.

Stan: Oh Kenny… I'll miss you.

Dipper: I honestly never knew you that well… But you did a great thing that night.

Kyle: Rest in peace.

**Meanwhile.**

A shovel poked its way out of the Mound of Snow and Randy Marsh emerged from the other side, He got out and started joyfully at the sky above him, Soon followed by Everyone else.

Randy: It's over, We're free…

Katara: Smell the fresh air, It's beautiful..

Stewie: Look!

A stuffed owl flew over head.

Owl: There they are.

Soon the Freedom watch appeared before them.

Mark: Well took you guys long enough, Did you find what the Storm was about.

Minnie: Well it's funny you should- HOLY SHIT!

Out came Eric Roberts with his Face bitten off and screaming.

Badger: What the Devil Happened to Eric Roberts?!

Mark: Damn It Randy I said No Cannibalism!

Randy: Hey, don't look at me! I didn't do it!

Jack: Than who-?! YOWCH!

Jack felt his Tail get bitten, Everyone looked down to Find Wendy trying to take a bite of it, Then stopped when she saw everyone looking at her.

Wendy: Uh… Heh, what can I say I was hungry.

Sharon: How long was she here?

Mac: I have no Idea… DIB?! VANA?!

Everyone turned to Find Dib and Vana frozen in Icicles and shivering.

Dib: Finally… Over…

**Three days later.**

Everyone at Mephsto's lab the day he was shot gathered round in his Room as he lay in recovery.

Dr Mephesto: Well everyone, Now that all this nonsense is out of the way, I can now reveal who the Father of Eric Cartman is.

Cartman: Who? Who is it?

Dr Mephesto: As I said before, The father of Eric Cartman is someone in this Room… And the Father is…

Everyone held their Breaths.

Dr Mephesto: Mrs. Cartman.

Everyone gasped.

Chef: What?

Tigger: What?!

Piglet: What?!

Liane: Yes, It's true.

Mr. Garrison: No that doesn't make sense!

Dr. Mephesto: Yes, It was quite a puzzle for me too, You see Mrs Cartman is a Hermaphrodite.

Grumpy: What does that mean?

Dr Mephesto: It means she has both Male and Female Genitals.

Liane: It's true.

Chef: So that woman we all got together with, She was a HE?!

Dr Mephesto: No not exactly, But she did have a penis.

Everyone either screamed or threw up.

Dr Mephesto: The fact of the Matter is, Hermaphrodites cannot bear children, So Liane's DNA match with Cartman can only mean, She is his Father and she got another Woman Pregnant at the Drunken Barn dance.

Cartman was gobsmacked.

Liane: I'm sorry I never told you Eric, I just thought It would be a little shocking to you.

Cartman: Gee you think?

Dipper: Well, All's well that Ends well I guess.

CartmanL No, No, Wait a minute! If she's my Dad, then who's my Mother!?

**Who is Eric Cartman's Mother, Is it? Sharon Marsh? Mrs Crabtree? Tiara the Manx?**

Dipper: ENOUGH! I've had Enough! Who has been doing this Voice! I demand your Identity! Who are you!?

Suddenly someone closed the book, and stopped writing.

Mickey mouse: Huh ha, See ya real soon!

**Meanwhile.**

Queen Grimhilde: So Ogthar, have your minions brought back enough Eggs for the Army?

Ogthar: Yes my Queen, Though there seem to be a few Complications.

He gestured to the Frozen Rhoga and Thudd.

Queen Grimhilde: Is That all?

Ogthar: Sadly no, It also seems some of the Yolks inside these Eggs were somehow either Damaged or Frozen over when they got here, But I believe I can still work with what I got.

Queen Grimhilde: See to it, I have other Matters to Attend.

**To be continued.**

**Well, How was the Story? Did you like it? Was it worth the wait? Well hand on tight because Next time, It's Canada for you and Me my friend. **

**Terrance: Say Phillip, What do you think Of Crossover legends?**

**Phillip: No Idea Terrance, What's it like?**

**Terrance: (Farts.)**

**Terrance and Phillip Laugh.**

**See ya next time, Be sure to Fave, Follow and Review. **


	12. Chapter 12

**Crossover legends.**

**The Quest of Terrance and Phillip.**

**Join Dipper…**

**Mabel…**

**Dib…**

**Wendy…**

**And Vana...**

**As Crossover legends…**

**IS NOT TO SEAN TONIGHT!**

**AS THAT WE CAN BRING YOU.**

_**A TERRANCE AND PHILLIP SPECIAL!**_

**Yay….**

**Now we join these dashing heroes, As they embark on the journey of a lifetime in the new HBO Action movie.**

_**Terrance and Phillip, Not without my Anus!**_

Based on recent events in the Heroes vs Disney vs Non-Disney villains war.

_Canada, Courthouse of Toronto, 10:18 a.m._

In the Courthouse, Several Canadians listened as A man named Scott talked.

Scott the Dick: Ladies and Gentleman, Before you, today, Sits a murderer, On the ngiht in question this man entered the home of Dr. Herny Odwa and struck him repeatedly in the head with this Hammer.

He held up a Bloody hammer and turned to the Defendant.

Scott the Dick: That same murderer, is sitting here in this court and his name is Terrance!

At the Defendants desk, Sat Terrance and Phillip, Terrance was a Man in a Red shirt with the T on it and had Black hair and Phillip was the Man in the Blue Shirt with P on it and had Blonde hair, Terrance was the first to stand up.

Terrance: You're Honor, I would like to make a case in our defense.

Than he Farted and the Two burst out laughing.

Scott the Dick: Pah, You call that a defense?

He pointed to a table with several items on it.

Scott the Dick: This table of contents links Terrance to the Murder.

Scott then began picking them up, One at a time in reference.

Scott the Dick: Hari fibers, Blood samples, Nail clippings, A piece of his Shirt.

Terrance: None of those are mine.

Scott the Dick: A watch with his initials on it, A day planner with the murder scheduled.

Terrance: Okay those may be mine.

Scott the Dick: A Hikou called "Time to kill Doctor Odwa.

_Dr.-O-Dwa._

_Time to have your head smashed in._

_With my new Hammer._

Terrance: I have never written a Hikou in my life.

Scott the Dick: Terrance! You may be a famous Surgeon, But your not god!

Terrance: I never said I was either, Say, Phillip, Would you like a Monkey clod?

Phillip: What's a Monkey Clod?

Terrance farted, And the Court laughed.

Terrance: That's called the Monkey Clod because it feels like my Anus is being ripped apart by a thousand Monkeys.

The Judge banged her Gavel.

Judge: Come on, Let's get a move on here people, I ain't getting any younger.

Phillip: My thoughts Exactly.

He then walked to the Center of the room and Addressed the Jury.

Phillip: People of the Jury, My Client, and Friend Terrance is an Innocent man and the accusations against him have only this Response.

Phillip then proceeded to Fart.

Terrance: Oh Phillip! Your closing Argument was a Fart!

Phillip: It was, wasn't it Terrance.

Phillip farted again and the entire court erupted in Laughter, All except Scott.

Scott: Your Honor! The defense is trying to make a Mockery of this court! They think that Farts are Funny, But they're not.

Judge: Sustained.

Phillip: Good people of the Jury, My Friend, and Client Terrance is no more a murderer than you or Me, He has never written a Hikou in his life, Plus he is a good man who loves Puppies and Hates Mean things, Would a Murder go to the Zoo and do this?

He Held up a Picture of Terrance feeding a Carrot to a Llama, The jury was silent.

Phillip: Of course not, So in submission, he is not the Killer, So please find him innocent, The defense rests.

Phillip returned to his seat with a Fart in Scott's face.

Judge: Madame Forman would you please read a verdict so we can get the hell out of here?

Forman: We have your Honor, We Have Found Terrance, for the Murder of Dr. Jeffery Odwa…

Terrance and Phillip farted before she could finish, Than laughed.

Judge: Uh, your gonna have to repeat that.

Forman: I said, We find-

Another Fart sounded followed by laughter.

Forman: We find Terrance.

More Farts and Laughter.

Forman: NOT GUILTY!

Terrance and Phillip stopped the farts and Laughter.

Phillip: Oh not guilty? Sorry, we thought it was the other.

Terrance: You did it, Terrance, You saved me from the gas chamber!

Phillip laughed.

Terrance: That wasn't a joke.

Phillip: Oh.

**Later.**

As the court was Adjourned Terrance and Phillip left the courthouse.

Terrance: Well now what should we do Terrance?

Phillip: Maybe just go home, And eat craved dinner.

Just then Scott came up to them.

Scott: Well looks like you got away with it Terrance and Phillip.

Phillip: Oh hello Scott, No hard feeling about losing in Court pal?

Scott: Shut up! This isn't over! I'm gonna make you both pay for your Humiliations against me, And do you know why?

Terrance: Because you're a dick?

Scott: No, Because I hate you, You think Fart jokes are so funny, Well they aren't Fart jokes are the lowest form of Comedy, and If you-

Terrance cut him off with a Fart, Followed by laughter from both him and Phillip.

Scott: Gah! I hate you both! I hate you both so much I wish you had Cancer.

Terrance and Phillip were shocked.

Phillip: Cancer!?

Scott: Yes, In the head! This is not the end you two, Mark my words!

Terrance: Wow, Scott really hates us, Phillip.

Phillip: Yeah, Maybe he's homophobic.

Terrance: But we're not gay Terrance, right?

Phillip: No of course not… Right?

Terrance: What do you mean?

Phillip: Your not gay are you?

Terrance: What? No, are you?

Phillip: Of course not!

Terrance: Okay, Okay just wondering.

Phillip: …

Terrance: Phillip If everyone here started questioning their Sexuality, We'd figure out How and Why Scott tries to convict me of Murder every week, Like right now.

Phillip: Okay, Okay, Just wasn't sure Come on lets just take the Subway home.

Terrance: Right.

And with that, The two straight friends boarded the Subway.

**Meanwhile.**

Scott had just returned to his house when the phone rang, he picked it up and Answered.

?: Ey guy! Is this Scott from Canada?

Scott: Yes, Yes it is.

?: You're a Journalist, right?

Scott: Yes, I'm a television critic for Magazines.

?: I understand that you hate Terrance and Phillip.

Scott: Yes, Yes I do, How do you?

?: That's not Important right now, I just wanted you to know that I could help you get rid of them once and For all.

Scott was unconvinced.

Scoot: Who is this?

On the other line, The Caller turned around in his chair.

?: You know, Some big shot Villain.

Scott: What Big shot Villain?

Scott felt a sudden lump in his Throat.

Scott: Wait… Are you? Lord Jargafar?

?: What? No! Of course not, This is just your old pal, Saddam Hussein!

Scott gasped.

Scott: Saddam Hussein!? The Irakian dictator?!

Saddam: Hey relax guy, I'm just your Average joe take a rest.

Scott: What do you want?

Saddam: You want Terrance and Phillip out of Canada, I want you to bring me and my friends into Canada, That sounds like a Fairtrade, right?

Scott: I'm not sure I should trust you.

Saddam: Hey relax Guy! Trust me.

Scott paused and Considered his options.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip just arrived home.

Terrance: So you wanna go looking for Treasure sometime Phillip?

Phillip: Oh yes, Phillip I would certainly- Oh god It's Bob.

Terrance: What? Crap.

A man with an Orange Shirt with the letter B on it came up to them.

Bob: Hello Terrance, Hello Phillip.

Terrance: Ugh… Hi Bob.

Bob: How's it going.

Phillip: Fine until you showed your ugly face.

Bob: How can you say that?

Terrance: Because you're Ugly as Hell.

Bob: I know that but-

Phillip: Seriously, Your face looks like somebody tried to put on a Force file with a Screwdriver.

Bob: Well I can't help how I look, Besides It's not what's on the outside that matters, It's what's on the inside.

Terrance: Tell that to the 99 children you traumatized with your face.

Bob: One time!

Phillip then pulled out a Paper bag and put it on Bob's head.

Phillip: Look, Just where this paper bag, If people can't see it, They won't know how ugly you are.

Bob: Really? Thanks, guys, Maybe now I can score with chicks.

And he walked off, Terrance and Phillip walked back into their house, Where their Dog and cat were.

Phillip: Barky, Perry we're home.

Barky and Perry responded with their signature noises.

Terrance: Well you just see what's on Terrance, I'll go make us dinner.

As Terrance went into the Room, The doorbell rang and Phillip wen to Answer it as he opened the door he was faced with a Man Holding a Clipboard and a Letter.

Mailman: Special delivery for Terrance?

Phillip: Terrance lives here yes.

Mailman: Sign here and Here and Here and Here… And Here.

Phillip wrote down their Signatures on the Assigned lines.

Mailman: Here's your letter, Have a good day.

And He left.

Phillip: Oh Terrance.

Terrance came back into the living room.

Terrance: Yes Phillip?

Phillip: You got a letter.

Terrance: For me? From who.

Terrace took the letter, Opened it, and Red it.

Terrance: OH MY GOD!

Phillip: What?

Terrance: It's Sally! She's being held prisoner in Iran!

Phillip gasped.

Phillip: Oh No! Not Sally! Wait, Who's Sally.

Terrance: My daughter.

Phillip: What?! You have a Daughter?

Terrance: Did I ever mention I had a Daughter.

Phillip: No.

Terrance: Well…

And Terrance told Phillip the whole Story about him and Celine Dion.

Phillip: We were with Celine Dion?!

Terrance: Yes, And now our daughter is being held captive in another County, I have to go save her.

Phillip: Then I'll come with you, Terrance.

Terrance: Thank you Phillip, But first though… I need to do something.

**Later.**

Terrance walked up to a large pink house, Before ringing the doorbell, He sighed and pressed the Bottom, Out came a Woman with a Brown hair, A Purple shirt with the Initials C.D. on them.

Terrance: Hello Celine…

Celine Dion: Terrance, what a surprise.

Terrance: You're looking well.

Celine Dion: And you.

Terrance: Celine, I need to know where our Daughter is.

Celine Dion: She's in the Middle East, Studying anthropology.

Terrance: No! I got a letter saying she was taken Hostage and being held in Iran!

Celine Dion: What?!

Terrance: Phillip and I are going to Rescue here If we don't return… Okay, I just scared myself.

And he turned to leave.

Celine Dion: Terrance wait!

Terrance stopped and looked back.

Celine Dion: What happened to us?

Terrance sighed.

Terrance: We just...Grew apart… I have to go.

Celine Dion: Please bring our Daughter home safe.

**Later.**

Soon Terrance and Phillip arrived at the Airport, they went up to the Front Counter to order tickets.

Phillip: Yes we'd like to get two Tickets to Iran, please?

The Ticket man was surprised.

Ticket Man: Iran? You can't go there, That's dangerous.

Phillip slammed his fist on the Counter.

Phillip: Damn it, man! Danger or no I'm going to help my friend find his Daughter!

The Ticket man looked surprised than checked his Logs.

Ticket Man: If you say so… There's a flight leaving today.

Phillip: Good We'll take it.

Terrance and Phillip took their tickets and headed to the Plane.

Phillip: You know Terrance, I'm sure going to miss Canada for a while.

Terrance: Same here Phillip.

Phillip: Terrance, If I die in Iran, Please Bring my Body back to Canada and Bury me in a box with a side of Craved dinner.

Terrance: Only if you promise to do the same.

And with that, they bored the plane, Unaware that Scott was watching.

Scott: This is Guy to Red Dragon Come in Red Dragon.

Saddam: Go ahead Guy, This is Red Dragon.

Scott: The plan is working Perfectly, Terrance and Phillip have taken the bait.

Saddam: Excellent, My forces and I are Prepared to come to Canada, Has everything bean arranged?

Scott: Yes, Everythings proceeding according to Plan, And you did promise that when Terrance and Phillip Arrive in Iran the Assasins you hired would kill them.

Saddam: Ey relax Guy, I'll keep my side of the Bargain.

Scott: You better, Guy out.

And he put away his walkie.

Scott: I've got you now, You fart loving Tricksters.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip's plane flew all across the world Stopping in America and Other places on the way, They Farted and Laughed the Whole way to Iran Until finally, they arrived in the City of Tehran.

Terrance: Damn it, Phillip, How can we found my Daughter here? We're unwanted Strangers, We don't speak the native language and we don't know where to look.

Phillip: Do we evan know what your Daughter looks like?

Terrance: Of Course I have a photo of her right here.

Terrance pulled out a photo of his daughter, She was a small child with the Brown hair of her mother, A light Green dress, and a pink bow.

Phillip: Hmm, Looks more Celine Dion than you Terrance.

Terrance: Trust me you'll see the Resmbelance soon If we ever find her.

?: Perhaps I can help.

Terrance and Phillip looked to see A man in a Blackish Red robe and Greyish black hair with a Go tee of the same Color.

Terrance: Who are you?

Ult Al Cur: Just a fellow Traveler, I know where your daughter could be, He's in an Old warehouse down that way.

Terrance: Oh thank you, friend, Come on Phillip.

And the Two raced off to where Ult pointed, They rounded a corner and Found the warehouse, Slowly they opened the door and crept inside, There they found Sally, Just standing there.

Sally: Who were?

Terrance Quickly ran over and knelt down to her Daughter.

Terrance: I'm here Sally, It's your Father Terrance, I'm here to bring you home from your Captives.

Sally: Papa.

Phillip: Hmm, Still doesn't look like you, Terrance.

Just then, Sally farted.

Phillip: Ah now I see the Resmblense.

Terrance: Well enough of Iran let's get home.

?: Not really gonna happen Kunucks.

Terrance and Phillip turned around and saw a man, Dressed in a grey trench coat, and had a Bald head with a red target on it.

Terrance: Uh, Who are you?

Bullseye: Name's Bullseye folks.

And he pulled out some Cards.

Bullseye: Picked a card.

He then threw them at the Wall where Terrance and Phillip stood and they hit Areas in ver close Proximity to them.

Phillip: Uh… Fitting name.

Bullseye: Thank you, Now if you gentleman don't mind I've bean paid to kill you.

He then pulled out a Knife and aimed it at Terrance and Phillip.

Terrance: Kill us?! Why?

Bullseye: Like I said, Payment.

Terrance: Oh uh… I see, Well we could pay you.

Bullseye: How much?

Terrance and Phillip turned around and blasted Bullseye with Farts, Knocking him Uncoincise Than they both Ran off with Sally laughing! Back on the Plane and Back to Canada.

**Later.**

Terrance and Phillip were soon back in Canada.

Terrance: Well that was an Adventure Phillip, Now that I got my Daugther back, I'm thinking of going to Celine Dion's house and ask her to marry me.

Phillip: Oh… Good for you man, Feels like I'm losing a Freind.

Terrance: No, No your not, I'll make you the best man.

Phillip: Just kidding man.

Sally: Papa, Papa!

Sally was suddenly pointing at something.

Terrance: Sally? What is it-?

Phillip: OH MY GOD! What is this!?

All over the City were Giant posters of Saddam Hussien!

Phillip: Is this Canada?!

Terrance: It's… Changed.

Phillip: This is Madness! How could things have changed so much!?

Terrance: And who is that guy on all these Pictures?

Phillip: I don't know… Maybe we should go to Celine's house, perhaps she knows something.

**Later.**

Terrance and Phillip quickly took Sally to Celine Dion's house, Terrance knocked on the door and Celine came out.

Celine Dion: Terrance! Uh, What a surprise-

Terrance: Celine I brought our Daughter back, And there's a Bunch of Pictures of a Grubby man everywhere, What's going on?

Celine Dion: Could you come back a little later?

Phillip: Why?

Celine Dion: Uh, Just a little busy right now.

Terrance: Celine, Do you have a man over?

Celine Dion: Well, I.

Suddenly ugly Bob Appeared beside her.

Bob: Hi guys.

Phillip: Oh my god It's Ugly Bob!

Terrance: What the Hell are you doing here?!

Bob: I'm doing Celine Dion what's it look like?

Terrance was Absolutely Outraged and Devastated.

Terrance: You… You… You bitch! I wanted to make us a Family again, And now you go and sleep with him!? With Ugly Bob!?

Celine Dion: why are you calling him Ugly Bob?

Terrance: Because that's his Name you stupid bitch!

Phillip: Terrance! Calm down man You have a daughter here!

Celine Dion: You said your name was Handsome Bob!

Terrance: No it's not! Take a look.

He then ripped the Bag off of Bob's head, Celine screamed with Horror!

Phillip: Yep, Behold his Horrible face.

Celine Dion: Oh my god, He's… He's… So ugly! I … I'm pregnant with his child!

Terrance: WHAT?! No, No! NO!

Celine Dion: I'm going to have a freak baby!

Terrance fell to his knees and let out an Agonizing yell to the Heavens.

**Meanwhile.**

Saddam sat in his Office When Scott came up to him.

Scott: Hey Saddam, You helped me get rid of Terrance and Phillip and I appreciate that, But why are framed Pictures of you going up all over Canada?

Saddam: Huh? Oh, that? Don't worry guy, You just need a rest.

Scott: No I don't need a rest, I demand to know what this is all aboot.

Saddam: Hey relax buddy, I'm just making sure that Terrance and Phillip can never come back to Canada again.

Scott: I thought you Hired that Bullseye fellah to kill them.

Saddam: He should have done so by now, I just need a couple of things here, Then I'm headed back to Iran.

Scott: But your From Iraq.

Saddam: Iran, Irak what's the Difference? Relax guy.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip watched as Iraqian troops marched through the Streets.

Terrance: Oh Phillip, Something bad is Happening to Canada, I just know it.

Phillip: I agree whole Fartedly.

They both laughed at this, Than suddenly Scott the Dick marched over.

Scott: Hey! What the hell are you guys doing back here?

Terrance: Oh hey Scott.

Scott: I thought you went to Iran looking for your Kidnapped-

Scott stopped himself and quickly rethought what he was saying.

Scott: Uh, I mean, How are you guys today?

Phillip: What were you saying?

Scott: Nothing why?

Terrance: Here's why.

Terrance Farted and he and Phillip laughed.

Scott: Gah! I hate you Terrance and Phillip! I absolutely abore you both!

He then began waving his hands out at them.

Phillip: What are you doing?

Scott: I'm wishing Cancer upon you!

Terrance: What?

Scott: That's right, I'm trying to give you both Cancer with my Mind.

Philip: You can't do that.

Scott was taken aback.

Scott: What you can't?

Terrance; No you can't.

Scott: Dang it.

And he walked off, leaving Terrance and Phillip to glare suspiciously after him.

**Meanwhile.**

Saddam was in his office going over his Plans when one of his Lieutenants came into the office.

Lieutenant: Sir, There are men from the U.S. Army here to see you.

Saddam quickly hid his plans.

Saddam: crap really, Okay send them in.

Two U.S. Army generals then came into the Room.

Army general: Mr Huissen, We are here on Behest of the Canadian government, they're worried.

Saddam: Worried? About what?

Army General: Well you seem to be, Taking over Canada.

Saddam: Taking over Canada, Ey you need a rest fella, I'm not hiding any bombs.

Army General: We didn't say anything about Bombs?

Saddam: Oh, You didn't? Ey relax.

Army General: We're giving you Three days to pull your Forces out of Canada, If you do not comply by then we will be forced to bomb Iran.

Saddam: But I'm from Iraq.

Army General: Iran, Iraq what's the difference?

And with that they left, The lieutenant sneered after them.

Lieutenant: Bah, I hate Americans, Please let me Kill them sir.

Saddam: No, No you need to relax Guy, Remember the Plan, First we take over Canada, Than align ourselves with one of the other Villain factions, and with their help, We'll take over the U.S. and the Royal Council and with them out of the way, We will crush the Freedom watch and either conscript or Destroy the Other Villain factions and than, Take over the world!

Saddam then threw himself onto the table and Laughed Evilly! Just as Scott came in.

Scott: What's so funny?!

Saddam Collected himself and sat back down.

Saddam: Nothing, Relax buddy.

Scott: Saddam, Terrance and Phillip are back in Canada.

Saddam: Really?

Scott: You said you would take care of them!

Saddam: Well obviously Bullseye fucked up, Hardly surprising seeing as how he gets his ass handed to him by a guy in a Devil costume a lot.

Scott: Well what the Hell are we gonna do now?

Saddam: Nothing.

Scott: What?

Saddam: they're no threat, I only got rid of them to appease you.

Scott: Wait you mean you? Oh you Trickster I'll take care of you!

Saddam: Will you now?

Before Scott could do anything the Iraqian lieutenant held up his gun, Seeing no other Option Scott relented and left the office.

Scott: This deal just fucked me over.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip were back at home eating their long awaited Kraved Dinner while watching the news.

Phillip: Wow, Things in America's crazy right now, The last Airbenders bean found, The Prime Commander dead, As if there weren't enough problems in the world.

Terrance: Guess not…

Phillip noticed something wrong with Terrance.

Phillip: Terrance? What's wrong?

Terrance: Nothing, Nothing… It's just… I just wanted to be with Celine again, Raise our Daughter together, Get Married, Grow old, But now...

Phillip put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

Phillip: hey man, Chin up there will be other girls out there, You never know.

Terrance: I guess So.

He then turned the Channel to the News.

News Anchor: And in other news It appears that Saddam Huissen Iraqian dictator has signed an Agreement to let the US military and other Peacekeeping factions to inspect his Military operations, When asked if he would Uphold his side in the Agreement, Huissen replied "Ey relax fellah, You need a rest guy."

Terrance: Saddam Huiseen? That's the guy we've seen all over Canada.

Phillip: Yeah the Oragian Dictator!

Terrance: Oh my god! Phillip we can't let Canada be Conquered by this Monster! We have to do something!

Tha the Phone rang, Terrance went over and Answered it.

Terrance: Yes?

On the other end of the Phone was Scott.

Scott: Terrance, this is Scott.

Terrance: It's just Scott.

Phillip: Tell him he's a smelly bastard.

Terrance: Phillip says Hello-

Scott: Just shut up and Listen, You've unleashed a monster onto Canada and only you can get rid of him, Even though I hate you and I wish you had Cancer.

Terrance: God your such a dick Scott.

Scott: No, You're a dick!

Terrance: You're a dick!

Scott: You're a dick!

Terrance: You're a dick!

Scott: You're a dick!

Scott paused for a moment.

Scott: You're a Dick!

Terrance: You're a dick!

Scott: They two of you are the most annoying dicks in Canada, You give other Canadians a bad name, and I if I had my-

Terrance: oh I'm sorry Scott, Could you hold on a Minute.

Scott: Sure.

Terrance Held the Phone to his Butt and Farted, He and Phillip laughed.

Terrance: How do you like that Scott!?

Scott: You Son of a Bitch! I'll get you if it's a last thing I-

Terrance: Oh wait, I have another Call Scott could you please, Can you hang on?

Scott: Sure.

Terrance repeated his Earlier action and laughter ensued again.

Scott: Ah! God damn it! Now listen here If you want to save Canada You'll meet me at Carl's kravved Dinner restaurant in half an Our.

He then hung up.

**Meanwhile.**

At Celine Dion's House, She and Bob lay naked in bed together.

Celine Dion: Oh Bob, I have so many conflicting emotions, I love your Personality, But you are so Freakishly ugly.

Bob: Maybe the Baby will have your face instead of mine.

Celine Dion: Really? I suppose we'll be okay as long as you keep that bag on your head.

Suddenly the door burst open and Three Iraqian Soldiers burst in, Followed by Sddam Huiseen.

Celien Dion: What is this?!

Saddam Huiseen: Hello, My name is Saddam, I'm a big fan of Polo and have been searching for you for Quite a while Celine Dion.

Bob: Oh no you don't, She's my Bitch!

Saddam: Who are you?

Bob: I'm Bob, But my friends call me Ugly Bob, Because I have the features of a Deformed Burned Victim.

Saddam: Really? I thought all Canadians looked alike, Let me see.

Bob took off his Bag and Celine Dion screamed, Saddam and his Men just looked unimpressed.

Saddam: Hmm, Looks pretty normal to me.

Bob: Really?

Saddam: I guess, Look man I may need a favor for you, There's a Canadian football game tomorrow, The Iowa Rough Riders against the Vancouver Roughriders, It's at that Game where I will officially turn the Cnadian flag over to my Iranian one.

Celine: But I thought you were from Iraq.

Saddam: Iran, Iraq what's the Difference? I just need you, Celine Dion to sing the Iraqian National Anthem there, To signify my Hostile takeover of Canada.

Celien Dion: And if I refuse?

Saddam: No worries, Relax fellah.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip stood at the Restaurant waiting for Scott to arrive.

Phillip: Well Scott's not showing up, what now?

Terrance: I know, Let's search for treasure.

Phillip: Oh good Idea let's search for treasure.

Terrance and Phillip looked around when Scott arrived.

Scott: What are you Idiots doing?

Phillip: We're looking for Treasure.

Scott: Treasure? Is that some kind of Metaphor for Nothing?

Terrance: No, We're just looking for Treasure.

Scott: Listen, You know about Saddam Huiseen right?

Phillip: Uh yeah, We've seen him all over town! He's taking over our Country.

Scott: So what are you gonna do about it?

Phillip: What do you mean?

Scott: It's your fault he's here, You brought the Iraqians back with you when you came back from rescuing your daughter.

Terrance: What?! Were to blame?

Phillip: Wait a minute, We came back from Iran, Not Iraq.

Scott: Iran, Iraq what's the difference, ANyway now you must make amends, Tomorrow Saddam will finalize his takeover of Canada at the Football game, It will be your only shot to take out Saddam, So take this.

Scott pulled out a Timebomb and handed it to Phillip.

Phillip: Is this a bomb?!

Scott: That's right, One of you must strap it to yourself, Go to the game and Sacrifice your life to take out Saddam.

Terrance: Why would we do that!?

Scott: For Canada!

Terrance and Phillip glanced solemnly at each other.

Phillip: For Canada Terrance.

Terrance: For Canada.

And they walked off, Leaving Scott to stare evilly after them.

Scott: Yes, and when the dust is settled, Canada will be rid of both Huissen, And your Fart humor.

**Meanwhile.**

Terrance and Phillip sat on their couch with the time bomb.

Terrance: Well, Looks like one of us has to die for Canada.

Phillip: Do we?

Terrance: Wait what do you mean?

Phillip: I don't exactly trust Scott Terrance, Didn't you hear what he said when we came back to Canada?

Terrance: Vaguely yeah.

Phillip: He said something about Sally, Like he knew she had bean Kidnapped.

Terrance was shocked.

Terrance: Wait are you saying… He hired Bullseye.

Phillip: Maybe, while we're gone, Saddam Huiseen and his Army come in and Take over Canada.

Terrance: Wiat, so your saying this was All Scott's doing?

Phillip: Yeah, and now he's blaming us and Tricking us into killing ourselves with this bomb to clean up his own mess!

Terrance: That Rat Bastard! When I get my hand on him-!

But before he could finish he farted, Causing them both to Laugh.

Phillip: Wait a minute, That fart gives me pause.

Terrance: Why is that?

Phillip: Does Saddam Huiseen use German Chemical warfare?

Terrance: I've heard Rumors.

Phillip: Terrance, Get the Phone book, We must call every Canadain we can!

And he quickly picked up the Phone.

Terrance: Sounds like you have an Idea Phillip.

Phillip: I do Terrance, I do.

**The next day.**

The Stadium was crowded with People as they watched The Ruffriders face off against the Ruffriders, The score was 28 to 7.

Announcer: And the Ruffriders are really giving the Riffriders a run for their money, I must say that these Ruffriders are certainly out matched by these Ruffriders, Be sure to stick around for the Halftime show, Saddam Huiseen and the Electric Iragis, In a salute to Hostile takeovers.

Two ends of a Stage were connected in the center of the Field and a Brass band marched through, In the seats, Terrance and Phillip sat incognito as they waited, with Sally.

Terrance: Well, It's almost time Phillip.

Phillip: Yes, Get everyone ready.

Saddam then climbed onto the stage and addressed the Audience.

Saddam: Hello, to my Canadian friends, Everybody relax, Take a rest, Put your feet up, Those dogs are barking, Anyway you may have noticed some changes to your country, But don't worry the changes will continue, Starting now, Canada from this point on will be referred to as New Bagdah!" Qoloh Qolah!

On cue, The Canadian Flag was taken down and replaced with an Iraqian flag, The same happened to the Flag on the Stage, Everyone gasped in Horror.

Saddam: And now, You will bow down to me! You will obey my laws or you will be killed! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Celien Dion was brought on stage with a Gun pointed at her back.

Saddam: And you will now sing the Iragian national Anthem! Or you will be Stabbed in the Head!

Celine Dion: Shtud balaa shtud inca inca brusht...

Terrance: Now Phillip?

Phillip put on a gas mask, While Terrance sounded a microphone signaling everyone else to do the same.

Saddam: Hey! What the Hell is this?!

Celine Dion had put on a Gas mask too, Suddenly Everyone had taken down their Pants, Turned around and Farted, The Fart all combining and swirling Together around Saddam and his Minions.

Lieutenant: Ah! They are using Chemical warfare!

Saddam could not bear the Stench and he fell off of the stage and lied Unconuise, When the stench and Fumes cleared he and his Troops were Knocked out, Everyone cheered!

Terrance: We did it Phillip! We put down Hussein!

Phillip: Oh Glorious day!

Saddam was still knocked out when several Canadian Soldiers and took him away, Terrance and Phillip went over to Celine Dion and Ugly Bob, Celien embraced Terrance.

Celine Dion: Oh Terrance, You did it you saved Canada.

Terrance: It was all Phillips Idea.

Bob: God Bless you Phillip.

Phillip: God bless us all Ugly Bob.

Just than Scott the Dick appeared.

Scott: Hey what is all this?! You two were supposed to be blown up!

Phillip: Well, We came up with a better plan, You see Scott For all your criticism, It was farting that Saved Canada.

Scott: Ah! That is so Juvenile!

Terrance: Would you like an Apple?

Scott: Yes please of course.

Terrance jumped up and Farted in his face.

Terrance: How do you like them apples!

And he Terrance, Phillip, Ugly Bob and Celine Dion all laughed.

Scott: I HATE YOU TERRANCE AND PHILLIP!

And with that, Scott stormed away.

Terrance: So Celine, You feel like singing the true National Anthem?

Celine Dion: I thought you'd never ask.

She picked up the Mic and sang.

Celine Dion: _O Canada, Our home and Nation land._

Crowd: _True patriot love!_

_In all thy sons command!_

_With glowing hearts we see the rise,_

_The True north Strong and Free._

_From Far and Wide O Canada, We stand on ground for thee._

_God keep our land Glorious and Free_

_O Canada we stand on ground for thee._

_O Canada we stand on ground for thee._

__Terrance and Phillip laughed.

**The End… In Canada for now.**

**Enjoy this? No? Don't worry we'll see more Crossover legends soon, See you then. :)**


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